Edwin Akpan Joel – Assessments – International Institute for Global Leadership

As a Man Thinketh Assessment
By Edwin Akpan Joel (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

That man can create his own destiny by choosing to think the right thoughts.

2. What were the seven ideas which were personally most important to you and why? List these seven ideas followed by an explanation after each one as to why it was important to you. Use personal examples from your own life.

a. Dream lofty dreams, as you dream so shall you become – I have been accused and chided for always dreaming big. My mum, with a motherly concern, would say I shouldn’t aim high. According to her, my dad, instead of dreaming small dreams dreamt big dreams, and ended up achieving nothing.

I grew up with this kind of believe until I learnt in the words of Les Brown that I should shoot for the moon even if I miss it, I’ll land among the stars. The idea, “As you dream so shall you become” make a lot of impression to. It’s very important. But then, I have learned to think BIG and start small.

b. The thoughtless and the ignorant talk of luck – I have always believed that there is no such thing as luck. James Allen reinforce this when he wrote in this book- As a man thinketh, “The thoughtless, the ignorant, and the indolent, seeing only the apparent effects of things and not the things themselves, talk of luck, of fortune, and chance.”

The idea that in the success equation, there is no such thing called luck has and will continue to help me to work hard to attain success rather than wishing that the so-called Mother luck will smile on me one day.

c. Man is always the master even in his weakest and most abandoned state – In many streets in Lagos, we have beggars “litter” the whole place all because of their disabilities. They have written themselves off at the chance of leading a normal life. This happens because they don’t recognize that even in their weakest and most abandoned state; they are still the masters of their destiny. I have used this believe to change people’s life and personally, I am driven by the believe that no matter the degree of my disability, I still have my mind which I can still use to live the life I imagine for myself. The story of the former American President Roosevelt who was paralyzed yet made it to the White House validates this idea and inspires me a lot.

d. The body is the servant of the mind – Before now, if I notice any change in my body, I’d think I have been hit by a terrible sickness. For example, sometime ago, I observe some unusual muscle swelling on my chest. Incidentally, I was unknowingly suffering from pneumonia that comes with shortness of breath at the same time.
So, when I saw the swelling, I linked it with shortness of breath and concluded that it could be a cancer! I was so nervous when I went to see the doctor. But immediately the doctor told me nothing was wrong with me, I was okay instantly without taking a drug. And about the pneumonia, I just changed my lifestyle and stopped worrying about it. Today, I jealously lead a healthy life. So, the idea that the body is the servant of the mind is an important knowledge to me.

e. A man’s mind is like a garden – I have been hearing the expression, “Nature abhors vacuum”, but I didn’t grasp the full meaning until James Allen explained it in this book where he liken the mind to a garden. If it’s not cultivated and flowers planted, wild weeds will take over. Since then, I have nurtured my minds with pleasant, positive and noble thoughts. And its effect in my life has been remarkable.

f. Man is where he is that he may learn to grow – I have faced so many problems in my life. And when these problems come, I always blame everything conceivable and curse the day I was born – that was before. My thinking and life changed when I learnt that whatever problem I am facing in my life is being sent to instruct and not to obstruct me. The knowledge that man is where he is that he may learn to grow is one of the most powerful lessons I have learnt in my life. It’s not only changed my life, but also the lives of the people I mentor.

g. Men do not attract that which they want, but that which they are – This realization of this fact has led me to on myself in so many areas. I discovered that what I wanted in life wasn’t what I really wanted, I didn’t understand why initially. But since I learnt that we do not attract that which we want, but that which we are, I have been working tirelessly to be a person of value. And today, I attract great minds that provide me with the resources I need to succeed in life. Sometimes, it looks like magic or luck, but it isn’t. It’s just a validation of the idea that James Allen projected in this timeless book.

Additionally, this idea has helped me to take responsibility for where or what I am and for what happens or doesn’t happen in my life. So, I have been living my life in such a way as to attract good things and people into my life.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so, how?

First, these ideas will help me in the area of my health, which is very important. I rarely worry about illness because I now realize in an effective way that as a man thinketh so he is, and as he continue to think so he remains.

Secondly, these ideas will teach me to take personal responsibility, for what happens and doesn’t happen in my life. I also take responsibility for what happens or doesn’t happen in the lives of the people I lead at home, Church, club, and elsewhere.
Daily, I devote a significant amount of time to meditate on how to become a better person because I know that if I don’t fill my mind with positive thoughts, negative thoughts will take over.

It has always been my belief that the greatest sermon preached is the one that is lived. Many people may not get to read the book As a Man Thinketh, but by leading a noble life, I automatically become the book, As a Man Thinketh, read by all men. This will help to create a better world – a world filled with positive thinkers, great dreamers and doers, and people who have sound physical and mental health.

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“Everyman is where he is by the law of his being; the thought which he has built into his character have brought him there, and in the arrangement of his life there is no element of chance, but all is the result of a law which cannot err.”

Comment: This quote teaches me that the universe is unfolding as it should for my own good. So I don’t need to regret or worry about anything.
“The soul attracts that which he secretly harbors.”

Comment: In the area of my health, if I think illness, sure enough, the sickness will come. If I dwell my thoughts on noble things, then surely I’ll enjoy sound health. Even in relationships, the people I think about seem to be attracted to me.

“Circumstance does not make the man; he reveals him to himself.”

Comment: I was born into a bad environment so I was corrupt and I blamed it on my environment. But now, I have learnt that external circumstances reveal the kind of person I am because there are also people who have been born into the same environment and they are leading a noble life. This quote is really important to my life.

“The dreamers are the saviors of the world.”

Comment: This quote inspires me to dream big dreams. I have organized big seminars that started as a dream. And after each seminar, the feedbacks I get are always overwhelming. So, the expression, “The dreamers are the saviors of the world” is very inspirational.

“Nature helps every man to the gratification of the thoughts which he most encourages, and opportunities are presented which will most speedily bring to the surface both the good and the evil thoughts.”

Comment: This is very important to me in the area of goal setting. I have observed that 80% of the goals I intend to achieve expressed in writing and impressed upon the subconscious mind have always been attained. Opportunities I never before imagine begin to reveal themselves in amazing fashion. On the other hand, thoughts I don’t encourage a lot fade away without being realized.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

Absolutely none.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them helpful?

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions? If so, please comment.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

A. How interesting was it to read? 9
B. How helpful were the contents? 10
C. How easy was it to understand? 8
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 9

Jonathan Livingston Seagull Assessment
By Edwin Akpan Joel (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?
The main idea the author is trying to pass on is that as beings, we have a higher purpose we must follow and have no limitation whatsoever.

Idea #1: Not minding temporary pains in the pursuit of a worthy goal.

In part one of the book, Jonathan Livingston Seagull’s mother pointed out to him that he’s bone and feathers because he won’t eat preferring to spend his time flying. In reply, Jon said he didn’t mind being bone and feathers that all he wanted to know is what he can do in the air and what he can’t.

This idea is important to me because for quite some time now, my folks have been saying I am “bone and feathers” (To borrow Jon’s mother’s line). According to them, instead of spending my money on food, I spend it acquiring books and attending seminars. Sometimes I am tempted to think that my folks are right, but this idea reinforces my belief that things that matter shouldn’t be at the mercies of things that don’t matter.

Idea #2: Boredom and fear and anger are the reasons that our life is so short.

Before now, I lived a life of fear and anger and as a result, I frequent the hospital more times than I could remember. With this idea, the belief is implanted in me, that in the absence of boredom, fear and anger, I can live a fine and long life. And this will happen if keep doing what I love to do, following a higher purpose, and having no limitations at all, except the ones I build for myself in my mind.

Idea #3: There is more to life than eating, or fighting, or power.

In so many instances, the idea of doing something or going somewhere because of food, fame or power has always crossed my mind. Natural, though it is, but it isn’t the ultimate.
I have discovered that the exact opposite is nobler. The idea that there is more to life than eating, or fighting, or power reminds me of the gentle truth that correct principles can be presented in many ways. Henceforth, when faced with the desire to fight for food or power, I’ll remind myself that there is more to life than eating and fighting for power. This is an important idea I won’t toil with.

Idea #4: Any number is a limit; perfection doesn’t have limit.

This idea gives me a fresh and new perspective all together. This is the first time I am coming across this simple truth. I remember suggesting in the introductory meeting of the investment club I am about starting that the Club’s name should be “The young millionaires investment club.” A prospective member stood up and picked hole in the name saying the word “millionaire” is limiting, that it won’t allow us to aim higher and he added that we aren’t growing younger. What a perspective that was! I immediately realized the truth in what he said and agreed to change the name. That any number is a limit has changed my thinking pattern remarkably – for good.

Idea #5: Friendship doesn’t depend on space and time.

Said Jonathan: “If our friendship depends on things like space and time, then when we finally overcome space and time, we’ve destroyed our own brotherhood! But overcome space, and all we have left is Here. Overcome time, and all we have left is Now. And in the middle of Here and Now, don’t you think that we might see each other once or twice?” I am so impressed by this idea that I’ve to quote it before making my comment as to why it is important to me.

After high school, my friends, brothers and classmates either left for the university or left town. Because I resolved not to go to college to get the type of education I wanted, I was at home and I felt lonely, bored and devastated. I thought life would never remain the same again since I am going to miss them. Now I’ve learnt not to miss people, so to speak, because if friendship depends on things like space and time, then when we finally overcome space and time, we’ve destroyed our own brotherhood. This is another great principle for me to apply in my relationships and teach others as well.

Idea #6: The Law of the Great Gull – Be Yourself.

For the greater part of my life, I struggled to live up to people’s expectations. I copied other people in a bid to be accepted by the society. I wobbled and fumbled in different areas of my life because of trying to be like somebody else instead of simply “stupid” being myself. Even now that I have resolved to be myself, my acquaintances and friends still expect me to be something else – something that is generally acceptable. The idea of being oneself will not only help me to break free from the past but enable me to eliminate approval-seeking as a need.

Idea #7: Love is seeing the good in everyone and helping them see it in themselves.

Sometime ago, I was called to do an impromptu speech in the church. In between my speech, I brought in the need for love for one another. But I struggled to explain it practically. So, I tactically asked my audience what love is while I gathered my thoughts. How I wished I have read Jonathan Livingston Seagull and discovered one of the great meanings of love – seeing the good in everyone and helping them to see it in themselves. This simple idea of love will enrich my relationships as well as help me in my calling – human capacity development.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so, how?

In practice, the aforementioned ideas will empower me to jettison immediate gains and instant gratification and press on to live the purpose of my existence, which to me, is to help people solve their problems and achieve their goals.

First, I will enthrone love, which has been described as seeing the good in everyone and helping them see it in themselves, in my heart. Then I’ll break free of the opinions of others and go ahead to make the world a better a better place. But this will start from me making myself a better person which will in turn rub off on others especially those with whom I come in contact with daily.

I’ll dream big and avoid the idea of attaching number to my dreams since any number is a limitation and perfection has no limit. I’ll initiate life-changing programs that are too big for someone of my age – as the so-called experts are wont to put it.

These are just some of the practical ways I will apply these lessons to help me personally and then enable me to create a better world.

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

Quote: “Don’t believe what your eyes are telling you. All they show is limitation. Look with your understanding, find out what you already know, and you’ll see the way to fly.”

Comment: Even with all the motivational books that I’ve read, sometimes I still see limitation because of what’s happening around me. But again, the simple truth that the eyes show limitation will more than help me to overcome some limitations I harbour in my mind. And the great advice: “Look with your understanding, find out what you already know, and you’ll see the way to fly.”, is an advice whose time has come for me.

Quote: “You need to keep finding yourself, a little more each day.”
Comment: I earlier thought that discovering oneself will happen in one fell swoop, not knowing that the moment of discovering oneself is just the beginning, that it’s an everyday thing. This quote has helped me to level the fact that I’ve not arrived; I am still under construction like the Webmasters would say.

Quote: “This kind of flying has always been here to be learned by anybody who wanted to discover it; that’s got nothing to do with time. We’re ahead of the fashion, maybe. Ahead of the way that most gulls fly.”

Comment: There is nothing extraordinary about extraordinary feats, if I may put it that way. I have found out that when I say I’ll be happy and fulfilled when I meet a certain target or achieve whatever I am pursuing; I am not always happy or fulfilled. Instead it is the process I went through to meet the target that will exhilarate me and make me excited even to go for more. This quotation also shows others and me that the impossible is the possible that hasn’t been made possible. Everything great thing is waiting for anybody with average intelligence to make happen.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

No.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them helpful?

There are no exercises to complete.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions? If so, please comment.

Nothing.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

A. How interesting was it to read? 8
B. How helpful were the contents? 9
C. How easy was it to understand? 7
D. Would you recommend it to others? 9
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 8

Psycho-Cybernetics 2000 Assessment
by Edwin Akpan Joel

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

Main idea: It is your self image that set the limits for what you can and cannot achieve; every one of us acts, feels, and behaves in a way that is consistent with our self image.

Idea#1: The human mind has a goal seeking function that makes it always have something to aim for whether good or bad

This idea is so important to me because before now I take goal setting fro granted. For instance, I always enter a new months or new year or new week even new day with no plan and no goal to aim for. The result has always been what life chooses to give me, which more often than not is less than desirable.

Now I know that the human mind can either be a success or failure mechanism, that if I don’t set what I intend to achieve, life will set the ones I don’t desire for me.

Idea #2: My imagination can guide me towards success

This idea is so important to me because most of the time I engage my imaginations in things I don’t want. I imagine scarcity, I imagine sickness, I imagine lack, I imagine failure; in short, I imagine all the negative things in the world.

Now, this book has stressed to me again that the subconscious can’t tell the difference between a real experience and one that is vividly imagined. It agrees with every suggestion the conscious mind gives it. It accepts all my mental images as literally true and initiates the process of actualizing them, whether the images are constructive or destructive. I will be more careful now in what I feed into my subconscious mind.

Idea #3: Learn to relax, for only then will you access your creative imagination to succeed

This is probably the most impacting thing I learnt in this book. Truly, as the book has said, stress is private enemy number one. Why? Because stress has been running my life. I work so hard, but with little to show for it. I work 20 hours a day, rush to speaking engagements, in fact, I rush everywhere. I checked my blood pressure and the result I got was not so cheering.

Now, my life has changed. Even if I’m late for speaking engagements due to the crazy Lagos traffic, I’m as relaxed as Albert Einstein when he formulated the theory of relativity.

Idea #4: Use CRAFT formula to create new image

The reason I find the CRAFT technique to creating new image as important is because I’m being surrounded by folks with self-esteem problem at home, in the church, and in the club. I’m going to use the CRAFT technique to help them create a new image and use it to strengthen my own.

Idea #5: Use reflecting relearning to challenge popular beliefs

While growing up, I learnt so many things, things that bordered on money, relationships, sex, religion, and so on. And most of these things, I now realize, are not true after all. Now I can use reflective relearning to challenge, reevaluate, and confront these beliefs to succeed.

Idea #6: Avoid the willpower trap

This idea helped me to break free from the past. It led to a great paradigm shift and changed the way I think – for good.

I have tried several times to change many negative habits in my life such as lateness to events, but to no success because I used will power (“I will not go late,” I will assure myself, but as the book says, “Will power is often won’t power.”) Now, I’ve learnt to control my imagination to solve this problem.

Idea #7: A positive self-image equals longevity

This also is important to me because, naturally, I’m shy. But since I’ve learnt that shyness can actually be hazardous to health, I’ve practically become a sanguine when I’m not a sanguine by temperament. I create humour everywhere I go and, surprisingly, I can’t remember the last time I was sick.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so, how?

As revealed above, these ideas will help me in my daily life in planning, in having different perspective about life and helping others. I am going to teach Psycho-Cybernetics in my Church’s youth class. I am going to talk to my mentor to include it as part of his public speaking academy course. This I believe will help create a better world.

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“Physical relaxation plays a key role in the dehypnotization process. Our currently held beliefs … were formed without effort, with no sense of strain…. Our habits, whether good or bad, were formed in the same way. It follows that we must employ the same process in forming new beliefs, or new habits, that is, in a relaxed condition.”

Comment: This quote is commonsense and will motivate to relax I order to generate creative ideas instead of spending my time working, working, working.

“Always remember to measure success by your on standard — not “the Joneses” or your mother’s, or anyone else’s.”

Comment: I live in an environment where the media defines everything and states what should be done and what should not be done. This quote will help me challenge misleading popular beliefs and help others do so as well.

“Every idea that you have learned can be reevaluated and challenged. Every idea that has been reevaluated can be relearned with new data to replace the old.”

Comment: I just like the word “can” in the above quote. I discovered that all the ideas I’ve believed along were made up by people like me and not God, so they can be challenged.

“Surround yourself with people who want you to succeed.”

Comment: This one is a kind of confirmation of my belief. I discover that when I’m down emotionally, being with people who want me to succeed always boost my morale. So, I always pay my way to their places just be around them and get encouragement.

“If you postpone your trip to Mexico until you can speak Spanish like a native, you’ll never see the pyramids of Teotihuacán except in the National Geographic.”

Comment: This quote just have one message for me and others: Start, start, start whether you’re ready, you’ll learn as you go along and every other necessary thing will fall into place later.

“If you can’t stand the heat, don’t get out of the kitchen; just turn down the heat.”

Comment: This is important to me in goal-setting, that I should adjust and change direction instead of giving up easily.

“Strive for one-percent changes instead of 100-percent changes. If you try to improve your success by one hundred percent overnight, you’ll end up frustrated. Instead, try to improve by one percent in an hundred different ways.”

Comment: This quote will help me revel in accomplishing a bit in the process of pursuing the actualizing of my goal instead of going at it’s actualization in one fell swoop. I’ve made this mistake in the past and ended up being frustrated and almost gave up.

“Having a low opinion of yourself is not “modesty” — it is self-destruction. Holding your uniqueness in high regard is not “egotism” — it’s a necessary precondition to happiness and success.””

Comment: Hmmm… another great truth. This quote will help me to rebrand myself. Of late, in the drive for modesty, I sold people on the idea I am an idiot, stupid and inexperienced. But it didn’t work; people still maintained a different perception of me.

“When depressed, remind yourself “This too shall pass.””

Comment: This quote seems to be easier said than done, but it works. I am going to use it a whole lot since I descend to depression easily when faced with heart-breaking problems.

“When others doubt you, remind yourself that their doubt is their problem, not yours.”

Comment: This will help me reinforce what I am already doing. Before, I remain in my shell because I accepted peoples’ opinion of me as reality and it took me nowhere significant. Now, even if someone calls me a monkey I won’t care, I’ll start dancing.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them helpful?

Yes, I completed all of them. They were very useful. To mention a few:

* Taking Stock of My Set Point
* Exploring Where My Beliefs Come From
* How to Identify My False Beliefs
* How to Discover Why I Procrastinate
* My Frustration Index

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions? If so, please comment.

No.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

A. How interesting was it to read? 9
B. How helpful were the contents? 10
C. How easy was it to understand? 7
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 10

Success Through Positive Mental Attitude Assessment
By Edwin Akpan Joel

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

Main idea: Having a positive mental attitude will enable one see opportunities, solve life problems and live a happy, successful life as against one with negative mental attitude.

Idea#1: The human brain produces pulses and transmits ideas

This idea is important to me because one of my core strengths is generating great ideas with reckless abandon. I generate more ideas than I can work on. I am always surprised that most of the time I see people put the exact idea I generated to work and there’s always nothing I can do about them.

Now since I have learnt that it is because of the pulse my brain transmits, I’ll strive to work on my great ideas and not give other people the room to beat me to it.

Idea #2: It is not too late to succeed in any endeavour

The story of Milo C. Jones that was used in the book to illustrate this point made a massive impact on me.

It taught me that if a man, who late in life, became completely incapacitated could make use of his mind and make it happen, then I can, too, even in the harsh Nigerian economic environment where I spend a fortune everyday on electricity alone to run my business and have no rich uncles or influential connections in high places.

Idea #3: Using the principle of semantics to understand what people mean before jumping to conclusions

The idea is so important to me because, I easily jump to wrong conclusions and pick offense when people say things that could have other meanings. Instead of seeking first to understand what they mean, I judge them and it affected my relationships.

This idea will help me especially in my relationships to seek first to understand what the other person really mean so that I can communicate with them more effectively.

Idea #4: First remove the mote from your own eyes before seeking to remove it from other people’s eyes

This idea is going to help me a lot in building my credibility. When I want to criticize other people it will help me to first check myself and make adjustments so that I can have the moral authority to correct other people.

Idea #5: Use the step-stone theory to find satisfaction in your work

Indeed I was fascinated by the step-stone theory and it’s going to help me a lot in finding satisfaction in everything I do. Sometimes, when result takes long in coming, I find what I do boring. The step-stone theory is going to help me tie my daily routines to my major goals and make them stepping stones to the achievement of my goal.

Idea #6: Find one reason for the accomplishment of your goals instead of hundreds of reasons why you cannot achieve them

This idea is important to me because I run a business and business can be one complex system to run. Each time I have an idea for a new product or service, I’ll look for many reasons why I can’t implement them instead of reasons why I can.

For instance, I can rationalize that it is going to take a lot of article writing, it is going to take a lot of time to create, a lot of research, a lot of follow up, a lot of this and a lot of that. Now, this idea is going to help me change my thinking pattern so that I can succeed in my business and in life.

Idea #7: Business is other people’s money

For so long, I have been operating on the faulty belief system that I need my own money to start and run a business or any project. Now, this idea is going to help me use other people’s money. I now realize that millionaires make use of OPM (Other People’s Money) to create the wealth we see. I don’t have any money excuse not to succeed.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so, how?

These ideas will help me to look at the positive side of things, to see a cup as half full instead of half empty, to light a candle instead of cursing the darkness. In fact, it is already helping me. In the church, at home, and elsewhere, I look for solutions instead of looking for people to blame. I carry positive mental attitude into everything I do and I maintain it.

With the solutions I will proffer and the lives I will touch, the world around me will be much better. My positive mental attitude will be contagious and will rub off on other people who in turn will transfer it to others.

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“You have everything to gain and nothing to lose by trying. Success is achieved and maintained by those who keep trying with positive mental attitude.”

Comment: Really, this quote is going to help me try a lot more. Recently I discover that one of my weaknesses is not taking enough risk. But since I now learn that I have everything to gain and nothing to lose by trying, I am going to try out a lot of ideas and see which one works out.

I am trying to ask a lot more people for things I need. I am going to challenge members of my investment club which I preside over to try out new things, invest in stocks they are afraid of as well as put more money into real estate regardless of the nervous economy we now find ourselves.

“Keep your mind on the things you want and off the things you don’t want.”

Comment: Very simple quote that will help me greatly. I think a lot of thoughts like any other human being do, but most of them are… on the things I don’t want. Really, I don’t know why, but this quote is instructive enough and will help a great deal. The authors should know better than I do.

“When you have a positive mental attitude, the problems of your world tend to bow before you.”

Comment: This quote is going to help me relax and maintain a positive mental attitude to find creative solutions to the problems around me. I tend to go into depression when faced with problems of great magnitude, but now I have a secret weapon in positive mental attitude. Great quote!

“Your world will change whether or not you choose to change.”

Comment: This quote will help me change my world instead of waiting for life to change it for me because life changes my world to a world I don’t desire.

“Life never leaves us stranded. If life hands us a problem, it hands us also the abilities with which to meet the problems.”

Comment: This is a comforting quote. Another useful one that will help me have faith in the creator for solutions when faced with the problems of life.

“You are and will be the same you even though you lose an arm, an eye, or other parts of your body.”

Comment: This quote teaches me that there is ability in disability as they say. And also, that I am unique and my most important possession is my mind, and not my arms, leg or any other part of my body for that matter.

“It doesn’t take courage to take one step.”

Comment: True talk. It will help me overcome procrastination and take the first all-important step toward the actualization of my goals.

“The man who has something to live for lives longer.”

Comment: Wow! I’ll see. I always think I have a short time to live even with many things to live for. Now, this quote sort of gives me hope.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

No.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them helpful?

Yes, the success quotient analysis. It was indeed very useful.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions? If so, please comment.

No.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

A. How interesting was it to read? 8
B. How helpful were the contents? 9
C. How easy was it to understand? 8
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 9

Napoleon Hills Keys to Success Assessment
by Edwin Akpan Joel (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author is trying to put across in the book is that success don’t just happen, it is the application of certain immutable principles.

Idea#1: Once you have written down your plan, read it aloud to yourself at least once a day.

This idea is so important to me because I have written plans and goals, but I easily forget about them and do nothing about them.

This idea is going to help me focus, generate plans of actions, and do something everyday towards the attainment of my goals. In addition it will help make my goals an obsession so that I can achieve them faster.

Idea #2: Clearly determine rewards for participation in your mastermind alliance.

This idea is important to me because I have formed teams to achieve some programmes I initiated. But most of the time, members of my team don’t do the tasks assigned to them, they’re not always committed to the cause even though they show initial enthusiasm, and they always tend to give one excuse after another.

This idea has helped me to figure out that it is because there is no reward for their participation in the team. From now on, I’ll think up rewards to give to them in order to encourage their full participation and get their full cooperation and commitment.

Idea #3: Try smiling the next time you’re angry.

Because my work requires me leading and working with human beings of different ages, they get to annoy me most of the time. And what I do in anger has not always produced the best fruit.

Now, this idea is going to help me solve a lot of problems and prevent some from happening. Though funny and a bit unusual, I know it works because I’ve tried it a couple of times already. And it doesn’t only apply to when I’m angry; it also applies to when I’m having a terrible day. Laughter and smile work wonders in this circumstance.

Idea #4: Set aside at least an hour a day to contemplate your relationships to Infinite Intelligence.

What the author is talking about as relationships to Infinite Intelligence is mainly prayer.

This idea is important to me because in this world of hurry, hard work, and stress, it is very easy for me to forget about praying and reflection.

The little time I’ve spent doing this in the past has yielded enormous results that I can’t quantify. This idea is going to help me a lot spiritually and consequently physically.

Idea #5: Write out a list of all the advantages of your definite major purpose, and call them into your mind as often as you can.

I find this idea very important because at certain points in my life, I have stopped to ask myself whether my goals were really achievable. When I ask question like this, discouragement easily sets in, and I’m always tempted to give up.

But with this idea of listing all the advantages of my definite purpose, all the advantages of achieving my goals, whenever I get discouraged along the way, I’ll look up this list to fire me up.

Idea #6: Always render the most service you are capable of, with the best attitude, and you must do so regardless of your immediate compensation, even if it appears you will receive no immediate compensation.

My life is full of activities. I do so many things for people and have little or no time to call my own. But all this while, I seem not be getting the rewards I was told I’ll get when I go the extra mile. As a result, I tended to back off from rendering any service and if at all I did, I did with a not-too-good attitude.

This idea, which Ralph Waldo Emerson calls the Law of Compensation, is very important to me because it’s going to change my attitude and thinking pattern not to expect immediate returns from the services I render especially in monetary terms.

I remember how I almost blew a chance for referral when I went to facilitate in a seminar but was not paid before the seminar. I felt I have done enough and paid all the dues to begin getting pay checks for my speaking engagements. This idea is going to help me avoid this in future.

Idea #7: As an accurate thinker you must scrutinize every bit of information you encounter.

Just like other people living in a media-suffused environment, I tend to take everything I read in books, see in a video, and hear in audio programs hook, line, and sinker.

This idea is important to me because it is going to help me continually challenge anything I read, see, or hear regardless of the pedigree of the author of such learning materials.

I particularly appreciate the techniques for evaluation of books included in the book. It is going to help me a great deal and help me find the motive behind statements before I accept them as facts.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so, how?

These ideas are going to help me in the way I think, it’s going to help me take a lot of risks and help me focus.

This ideas have already helped me discovered the problems in my life like lack of focus, not being fully committed to my goals, and others.

I believe that by changing my thoughts and ultimately changing my life, it will help me to change others since I will have credibility. This will in turn help me to create a better world.

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“If you would plant for days, plant flowers. If you would plant for years, plant trees. If you plant for eternity, plant ideas!”

Comment: This will help reinforce the power of ideas over other things I see as obstacles to achieving my goals. I’ve always known that my problem is not money, people, or environment, but ideas. But I’ve always underestimated it. This quote will help me to follow through.

“If you can see an opportunity as quickly as you can see the faults of others, you will soon succeed.”

Comment: Again, this quote is important to me because I’ve overlooked many profitable opportunities that others also saw, but went ahead to work on it and reap massive reward.

“You can overcome almost any obstacle you face, no matter your own education or talents, if you use the mastermind principle effectively.”

Comment: This quote is important to me because as a result of my personality I like going at everything alone. Most of the time I achieve what I do, but they always take me a very long time. This quote is going to help me cut the achievement curve remarkably.

“Whatever you fear will follow you around like a puppy.”

Comment: Just like any other human being, I fear a lot of things. This quote will help me to look my fears in the eyes and confront them instead of running away from them since they are going to follow me, anyway.

“The quantity and quality of the extra service you render will come back to you greatly multiplied.”

Comment: I labour a lot, giving my very best in everything I do, but to my disappointment I don’t always receive immediate material rewards, this quote is going to help me a lot in keeping my head up knowing that the quantity and quality of the extra service I render will come back to me greatly multiplied sometime someday.

“That which you share will multiply; that which you withhold will diminish.”

Comment: This quote is particular important to me because it is a natural law. Sometimes, I get weary of doing good, I get weary of giving especially of my time and skills. Now, this quote is going to keep me on track next time I get weary of giving.

“The worst thing that happens to you may be the best thing that can happen to you if you don’t let it get the best of you.”

Comment: I easily get depressed when some misfortune befall me, this quote is going to help me maintain a positive attitude and look for God’s plan for my life in the problems I face daily in life.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them helpful?

Yes, I completed all of them. They were useful to my circumstances.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions? If so, please comment.

No.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

A. How interesting was it to read? 8
B. How helpful were the contents? 10
C. How easy was it to understand? 9
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 8

Nonviolent Communication
Assessment by Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea that the author conveys in this book is that human beings can communicate in a way that leads us to give from the heart, connecting us with ourselves and with each other in a way that allows our natural compassion to flourish.

2. What are the seven ideas which were personally most important to you and why? List these seven ideas followed by an explanation after each one as to why it was important to you. Use personal examples from your own life.

i. That we are responsible for our feelings.

This idea is important to me because I usually unknowingly pass the responsibility of my feelings to the other person by saying things such as, “You made me angry”, “I am disappointed because you didn’t do what I asked you to do,” and so on. I realized that this approach always doesn’t put me in a resourceful state and will do nothing to help me or shine the light on my needs. But by taking responsibility for my feelings, I focus on what I need and this has been putting me in a resourceful state to request for what I want.

ii. That we should express our feelings instead of calling people names or expressing our opinions.

This idea is important to me because I now realize that by expressing my feelings it helps to relieve me from emotional stress and enable me to connect with the other person on a compassionate level.

For example, I come under a lot of stress when I discover that the tasks I delegate to my team members don’t get done most of the time. So recently it repeated itself and I was tempted to give the other fellow a piece of my mind by telling him that he’s lazy, indiscipline, and inconsiderate and that I will never delegate anything to him again ever. But when I remembered this aspect of nonviolent communication, I expressed my feelings by telling him I feel sad and unhappy because I needed to get things done so that I can focus on some other important tasks.

iii. That we should observe without evaluating.

This idea is important to me because it transformed my communication and that of my protégés. I never knew it was possible to observe without evaluating and never knew either that evaluating is a life alienating communication.

Before now, my efforts to persuade people to do things always arouse resentments and self defense. This principle of observing without evaluating helped me to turn the table around. For example, I have made observation about people coming late to meetings without evaluating or judging them, I have made observation about my folks keeping late nights without arousing their resentment.

iv. That we should empathize with people in need of empathy.

This idea is important to me because I saw dramatic changes in people I’ve used it on. For example, I’ve used it to defuse my dad’s fiery anger when he had a very sharp disagreement with my brother, I have equally used it to connect with a young lady I was counseling who was bent on living up to the negative expectations of her parents who consistently call and affirm her as a bad child. In short, I use it everyday and the result has always been amazing, in that people feel better as if I gave them a magic pill and all I do is listen and ask questions.

v. That we should make requests instead of making demands.

This idea is important to me because before now I use to make demands and people always react to this by calling my bluff or doing things out of fear and guilt and this often affect my long term relationships. But my learning to make requests instead of making demands people now willingly do what I ask them to do.

For example, when I had just read the introduction of this book, I went with it to visit a friend and during our discussion, I demanded, “I want it now and I don’t care how you do it, all know is that I want it now!” He jokingly pointed to the book and said, “Edwin, you’re communicating violently and you’re reading nonviolent communication.” It got me thinking.

Then I literally ran through the book in about two weeks to learn how to make requests for my needs instead of making demands and cajoling people to get things done.

vi. That there is different between stimulus and cause of anger.

This idea is important to me because I usually hold other people responsibility for my anger. But the idea that the cause of my anger is what I tell myself when people do something to me has helped me tremendously in ridding my life of anger.

For example, recently I was angry beyond measure when my ophthalmologist wasted an enormous amount of time before attending to me and I had a very important business meeting to attend.

By listening to what I was telling myself and shining the lights on my needs and expectation at that time, I was led to empathize with myself and consequently defused the anger.

vii. That we should listen to people’s needs and feelings as well as our own.

This idea is important to me because it helped me to connect with people on a compassionate level and get in touch with their worlds. The people I perceive as bad I now perceive as good, the people I don’t talk to because of the way they live their lives, I now flow with because I now learn that we’re all needy beings in need of connection, understanding, empathy, love, and compassion.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These powerful ideas and lessons are going to help me especially in my communication as a leader and in all my relationships.

I’m going to be making a mental review of what I’m about to say before saying them using the principles of nonviolent communication as my standard. It’s already helping me in creating a better world. I now attract great people into my life by the way I communicate and I have begun teaching others the principles of nonviolent communication using examples from my personal life.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “We all pay dearly when people respond to our values and needs not out of desire to give from the heart, but out of fear, guilt, or shame. Sooner or later, we will experience the consequences of diminished goodwill on the part of those who comply with our values out of a sense of either external or internal coercion.”

This statement is important to me because I am always fond of making feel guilty especially when they don’t do things I want them to do. I now learn that in the long term, goodwill will diminish.

ii. “It is in everyone’s interest that people change, not in order to avoid punishment, but because they see the change as benefiting themselves.”

This statement is important to me because in my counseling sessions I always try to change people by telling them to avoid so and punishments and talk little about how the change is going to benefit them.

iii. “When we combine observation with evaluation, we decrease the likelihood that others will hear our intended message. Instead, they are apt to hear criticism and thus resist whatever we are saying.”

This statement is important to me because I evaluate people a lot and it has not been helping me. Now I know better not to combine observation with evaluation.

iv. “What others say and do may be the stimulus, but never the cause of our feelings. Our feelings result from how we choose to receive what others say and do, as well as from our particular needs and expectation in that moment.”

This statement is important to me because it’s going to help me manage my moods and anger.

v. “The message we send out is not always the message that is received.”

This statement is important to me because most of the time when I delegate certain tasks to people, they do something else. I’ve now learnt to request for a reflection to ascertain whether my intended message was accurately received.

vi. “If we openly acknowledge that our own distress is preventing us from responding empathically, the other person may come through with the empathy we need.”

This statement is important to me because sometimes, if not always, especially when I’m under stress and need to respond empathically, I fail at.

vii. “We “say a lot” by listening for other people’s feelings and needs.”

This statement is important to me because it will help me to be a better communicator.

viii. “When we are internally violent toward ourselves, it is difficult to be genuinely compassionate toward others.”

This statement is important to me because I have been communicating violently with myself and it has not been helping me to connect with others compassionately.

ix. “When critical self-concepts prevent us from seeing the beauty in ourselves, we lose connection with the divine energy that is our source.”

This statement is important to me because in trying to display humility and living up to my standard of excellence, I become hyper-critical of myself and it’s always left me in a non-resourceful state.

x. “Despite our unease in receiving appreciation, most of us yearn to be genuinely recognized and appreciated.”

This statement is important to me because I often feel uneasy whenever I’m being appreciated but on the other hand I do complain to people that nobody appreciates me. This statement is going to help me accept appreciation and enrich my life.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

Yes, I completed all of them and t found the expression feelings exercise particularly useful.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

None.

Ratings:

A. How interesting was it to read 9
B. How helpful were the contents? 10
C. How easy was it to understand? 9
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 10

Leadership for Dummies
Assessment by Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea that the author conveys in this book is that leadership is a people-centered skill that has to do with the ability to put other people’s needs above your own needs and the ability to listen and elicit cooperation.

i. That as a leader, I am never going to make everyone happy.

This idea is important to me because there are some points in my leadership where I must make a decision, and the decision will make one group happy and another unhappy. Based on this dilemma, I tend to go with the majority when making decisions which most of the time turns out not to be the best.

The idea that I am never going to make everyone happy is going to help me to be making the right decisions without worrying about people who are going to be unhappy.

ii. That I should always respond to situations flexibly.

This idea is important to me because as a leader I’m always faced with complex and difficult situations that stimulate my temper. Usually, the natural thing to do is call people names, yell, point accusing fingers, look for the scape goat, but the illustration given about responding flexibly is going to help me keep the end in mind, respond flexibly, elicit the cooperation of people at that point to prevent further damage and solve the problem on ground instead of “screaming and cursing the Fates.”

iii. That a leader’s most important job is “the relentless search for the truth.”

This idea is important to me because there have been situations in my leadership that I wish I had listen to every piece of key information before taking a very important decision.

iv. That the responsibility of a leader is to communicate the vision so clearly that no room is left for doubt among those who must execute it.

This idea is important to me because I have always been intrigued about why some people in the teams I lead, especially not-for-profit teams, execute things while others do not.

This idea made it dawn on me that the communication of the vision has not been very clear and leaves doubt in the minds of the team members. For example, in the not-for-profit team I lead, I have assigned team members to do some tasks to realize our vision — tasks like research, writing of some documents, making enquiries, but most have not done their tasks.

v. That leaders must not only explain, but they must also motivate their followers to take action.

This idea is important to me because most of the times, in executive meetings, I merely explain things to be done without motivating my team members to do the things I explain.

For example, I have asked my team members to do seven days fasting to approach a big challenge we were facing first from a spiritual standpoint. I did this without any motivation. This idea is going to help me turn things around.

vi. That I should always hang my goals on the wall and make copies available to every member of my team.

This idea is important to me because I always forget the crucial things that are to be done even though I do write them down on my executive diary.

For example, there was an important package that was to be sent to a very important team member as an incentive based on our reward system, but more than 60 days later, the package wasn’t sent because I forget about it and it affected the morale of the team member because he was expecting it. This idea is going to help me remember the goals and tasks that are to be done to avoid problems like this from arising in the future.

vii. That I should make a contract with my teams.

This idea is important to me because it is going to help me make use of a natural principle to motivate my team members to get things done without necessarily parting with large sums of money and it is also going to help me to get them focused.

As the authors suggested, when everyone agrees on a goal, I will sit down and write an agreement between me and all the members of my team. I will state clearly what the goal is and loosely define the mission. Give everyone a copy, and ask each person to sign it and return it to me. Make copies, sign them all, and return the two-signature copies to each person. Then, when we have meetings, I will refer to the contract whenever problems arise.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas and lessons are going to help me take right and better decisions, chair meetings effectively, develop visions and missions everywhere I lead.

It is going to help me create a better world by empowering and re-kitting me to provide sound, exceptional, and visionary leadership because everything rises and falls on leadership.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “If your own group cannot solve a problem, open it up to other people in your company. Post it on the company bulletin board and offer up a prize for a solution.”

This statement is important to me because there have been point my leadership that I was stuck on the way forward. This statement is going to remind me to offer incentive and motivate other people to help me look for solution.

ii. “Great leaders inspire people to go beyond what they think they are capable of doing, making it possible for a group to attain a goal that was previously thought unattainable.”

This statement is important to me because of the environment I find myself. I live in an environment where people think small, embrace mediocrity as a culture and see obstacles in their imagination all the time. This statement will help me inspire people to achieve the so-called impossible.

iii. “Leaders ask the what and why questions, not the how questions.”

This statement is important to me because I now know the kind of questions to ask when looking for ways out of problems as a leader and in facilitating meetings.

iv. “A leader has to keep the vision in the minds of his or her followers in every conversation, whether in a spoken or unspoken manner.”

This statement is important to me because my teams always tend to go off course; they make suggestions that are way off the vision. By keeping the vision in their minds, it will help them stay on course and make suggestions that align with the vision.

v. “A leader is allowed to say, “I don’t know” and ask for as many options as are needed to arrive at the best answers.”

This statement is important to me because some people, especially my followers, always look upon me as a superman, a magician, a miracle worker, and a demi-god who has answers to all questions. And I have unconsciously been trying to live up to this perception and expectation to the detriment of the group. Now, I know better with the help of this statement which the authors call Intellectual Honesty.

vi. “A leader is both frank and honest in describing the difficulties, but optimistic in his or her faith in the team’s ability to overcome obstacles to reach the goal.”

This statement is important to me because it is going to help me not to pump people full with lies and give them false hope. It’s going to help me to be realistic as well as optimistic without running down the team’s morale.

vii. “People work toward a goal when their lives or livelihood depend upon it.”

This statement is important to me because it will help me to ask the right questions when things don’t work out. For example, when people don’t come for meetings or do tasks delegated to them, it is going to help me to pause and ask, “Do their lives or livelihood depend upon these goals I’m asking them to work toward?”

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

Yes, I completed all of them and found them very useful especially the SWOT assessment.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

None.

Ratings:

A. How interesting was it to read? 8
B. How helpful were the contents? 8
C. How easy was it to understand? 8
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 8

Unlimited Power
Assessment by Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea that the author conveys in this book is that you can provide your brain with the most effective signal to empower you to take successful action in spite of any fear and do what was previously thought impossible.

i. That the difference between success and failure all comes down to the way in which we communicate with ourselves.

This idea is important to me because it makes me realize the negative way I’ve been communicating with myself for years.

For example, if I do something and fail at it, instead of taking it as a feedback, I’d say I’m no good, I’m not lucky, I’ve screwed up again, what the hell is wrong with me, and all sort of negative reinforcements and questionings.

Even recently, in the leadership course I just completed, I “screwed up” in a group assignment but did many things right. Throughout the day, I brooded on the one wrong thing I did and spoke negatively to myself. This idea helped me to be conscious of the kind of things I say to myself and helped me change my self-communication pattern.

ii. That if I see anyone in this world producing a result I desire, I can produce the same results if I’m willing to pay the price of time and effort.

This idea is important to me because it is going to help me to benchmark against the best in the world, to redefine and change my beliefs. I’ve long held on to beliefs that have been limiting me and preventing me from attaining my goals.

For example, one of the beliefs is that I can’t produce results like those of Bill Gates, Obama, Mandela, and other greats. This idea has changed that belief system.

iii. That misfortune is a point of view

This idea is important to me because it remarkably change my point of view about life. It showed me that if I take a position on any situation, that that is my point of view and that there are other view points to be considered.

For example, I’ve been battling with a health condition for years which I consider as a misfortune for years. But I’ve learned it is my point of view which I can change anytime to a view that will support me and put me in a resourceful state.

iv. That there is no such thing as resistance, there are only inflexible communicators who push at the wrong time and in the wrong direction.

This idea is important to me because it will help me to take responsibility for the results of my communication. It helps me to realize that if I can’t get people to do things I want them to do for me, then my communication wasn’t effective rather than saying the other person is insensitive or not understanding. Instead, this idea teaches me to me flexible and be responsible as a communicator.

For example, I have been trying to persuade my siblings to study hard for their exams instead of spending hours in front of TV. But they’ve remained adamant. Instead of saying they are stubborn and uncooperative, I now accept responsibly for my poor communication and look for better ways to persuade them to read.

v. That to create belief, I should acquire knowledge, see movies and view the world as portrayed by others.

This idea is important to me because apart from helping me realize the awesome power of believe, it also revealed to me how to create new beliefs that support me in the actualization of my goals.

For example, by reading books, I have seen instances where a public speaker who asked nurses to remove intravenous drip on him on hospital bed so that he can go to speak and after the speech returned to continue his treatment. And watching motivational movies has helped me to create new beliefs about what I can achieve. It helps me to now view the world as portrayed by others who are successful.

vi. That we can use pattern interrupt to change old and destructive patterns to new supporting patterns.

This idea is very important to me because it not only helped me to change my old destructive patterns like thinking of failure when I mount the podium to speak, it also help me to interrupt the pattern of my audience and those I counsel.

For example, when we wanted to engage in a serious legal and spiritual battle with someone who was oppressing one of my team members. My team members were scared to the bone and communicated in “but’s”, I stood up and announced very seriously that I don’t ever want to hear the word “but” again, I painted a picture of how everything will proceed and how the future will look like in few days from the day. Not one single person objected!

So, pattern interrupt is one of the most important ideas I learned from the book.

vii. That my environment plays a role in shaping my values and beliefs.

This idea is very important to me because before now I believed that the environment doesn’t play a role at all based on what I read in the book, As a Man Thinketh, that circumstance do no make man, I completely misunderstood it.

For example, I stay in an environment were people are not all that successful. Somehow, it provided me with a template, with values to live my life, but this idea that my environment plays a key role in shaping my values and believe has compelled me to go to places where I will be inspired to achieve great things.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas and lessons are going to help me simply change my thoughts, beliefs, and values. It is already helping me make impact in my world.

For instance, I have implemented and taught many of the principles like how to run my brain, establishing rapport, getting anything I want from anybody, and so on.

In my personal life, it is really going to help me in my family and in my church. I have already used the principle of changing people from kinesthetic thinking to visual thinking on my little niece to stop her from crying and disturbing people in the house, among other principles I have used.

On the world stage, these ideas are going to help me empower myself self and then others so they can live lives of possibilities that are without limits.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “You can have an idea or product that can change the world, but without the power to persuade, you have nothing. Communicating what you have to offer is what life is all about. It is the most important skill you can develop.”

This statement is important to me because I have products I consider to be the best in their classes, but I have been failing at selling them. This statement reinforced my need to acquire the most important skill of persuasion.

ii. “Consistency of a stimulus is a powerful linkage or anchoring tool. If you hear something often enough (like advertising slogans), there is a good chance it will become anchored into your nervous system.”

This statement is important to me because it helps me to be conscious of what I choose to listen to and see most of the time. It helped me to cut down on the kind of music I listen, the kinds of adverts I watch, the kind of books I read, and the movies I watch per time.

iii. “There are ways to see our biggest problems as our greatest opportunities –- if only we can step out of our trained patterns of perception.”

This statement is important to me because it helps me to be conscious of the trained pattern I’ve allow myself to buy into overtime that is not supporting me anytime I face so-called problems.

iv. “One of the keys to success is finding the most useful frame for any experience so you can turn it into something that works for you rather than against you.”

This statement is important to me because it empowers me to look for ideas, beliefs and values I could anchor any experience on to work for me instead of working against me. When I am faced with failures or difficult situations, instead of being upset, I look for the best frame to put around it.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

Yes, I completed all of them and found all of them very useful especially the one on the beliefs that have been holding me back and writing down my future the way I want it without any limitations.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

None.

Ratings:

A. How interesting was it to read? 10
B. How helpful were the contents? 10
C. How easy was it to understand? 9
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 10

Giant Steps
Assessment by Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea that the author conveys in this book is that there are specific and simple actions that will yield measurable results far beyond our expectations if we are committed to consistently putting our energies into them.

i. That whether or not we take action is strongly influenced by the specific questions we ask ourselves.

This idea is very important to me because it makes me to be aware of the internal questions I ask myself. Before I became aware of it, I used to ask myself questions that disempowered me. Question like, “When will I ever make it? Why is it that I keep facing this challenge all the time? Why me?” What if it doesn’t work out?” and so on. Now, anytime I catch myself asking any of these disempowering questions, I quickly rephrase it and ask myself questions that will empower me to take positive actions as the author suggested.

For instance, these questions enabled me to go into a profitable business partnership with one of the top players in my industry – a project I have been postponing because of the obstacles I foresaw and the “what if” questions I used to ask myself.

ii. That we should expand our personal “reference library” by reading books, watching movies and videotapes, attend plays, go to seminars, talk with strangers because all references have power and could change our entire life.

This idea is important to me because it provided me with something to inspire my faith, to think possibility, and aim higher. I have learned that if I can provide enough references for anything, I can achieve anything. And the suggestion of reading books, attending seminars and watching movies is a powerful reinforcement as well as a timely reminder to me.

This knowledge, for example, led me to do a leadership course that changed the course of my life. It inspired me to be watching the popular movie series – 24 starring Kiefer Sutherland that shows how one can overcome daunting obstacles to achieve anything.

iii. That the secret to achieving our goals is mental conditioning – that we should review our goals at least twice daily because whatever we consistently think about and focus upon, we move toward.

This idea is important to me because I have always believed that there is something missing in my goals setting system. And I discovered it in this idea.

The idea has helped me to review my goals daily and I’m seeing tremendous results already – I now do things that will move me closer to the attainment of my goals since. By reviewing my goals daily, it occupies my mind and helps me evaluate everything I do based on my goals.

iv. That obstacles are merely a call to strengthen our resolve to achieve our worthwhile goals.

This idea is important to me because I face a lot of obstacles and challenges everyday of my life. And sometimes I get so discouraged and dispirited. When that happens I lose momentum. For example, my laptop crashed amid several important projects I’m handling, a governmental organization space I wanted to use for office because of electric power issues suddenly went on strike, and so on. I was angry, unhappy and discouraged. But this idea fired me up and helped me to give a new empowering meaning to the obstacles I face in my life, relationships, and business.

v. That we should enjoy life’s “puddles” and make cheerfulness, outrageousness, and playfulness new priorities in our lives.

This idea is important to me because it has enabled me to enjoy every moment of my life. Before now, I brood a lot, I complain and whine. But not anymore – I now live with a “spring in my step, a smile on my face” as the author suggested.

For example, whenever I return home, my folks even if they were sleeping will know I’m back because I sing with a hilarious voice, whenever I yawn, I make fun of it, whenever I walk, I make it fun. And I must say this has had great impact on my health.

vi. That nothing has to happen in order for us to feel good; that we can feel good right now if we choose to.

This idea is important to me because it helped me to take responsibility for my feelings and feel happy at all times.

I was used to going about being despondent and getting pleasure from people showing me concern and asking what was wrong with me. I go about looking for pity parties. Now, whenever anything happens that tends to send me to depression, I remember I can still make myself happy, I can be happy because I’m alive and when there’s life, there’s hope. After all, even the Bible says a living dog is better than a dead lion.

vii. That whatever happens to us, we all have the capacity to create meanings that empower us.

This idea is important to me because it serves as another gentle reminder and reinforcement of my core believe that “all things happen for good.”

Like I said earlier, I face obstacles every single day of my life – some small, some so excruciating I’m tempted to give up. I’ve now learned to create meanings that empower, uplift and give me hope. And I have used this idea not only for myself, but to the many people that look up to me for learning and inspiration.

For example, the setbacks I suffered in the place I wanted to use as office and my laptop crash. I gave new meanings to them that enabled me to move on, the situations regardless.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

Taking consistent actions no matter how small I perceive them to be, clarifying my values and asking myself the right questions. It will help me to create a better world by seeing the good in everything and everyone and helping others to see it and act in ways consistent with our values.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “Those who succeed tend to make decisions rapidly and are slow to reverse a well-thought-out position.”

This quotation is important to me because I tend to wait for things to fall into place before I get started. The quote enables me to take decisions quickly whether I’m ready or not, especially well-thought-out decisions.

ii. “Having a powerful enough why will provide you with the necessary how.”

This quote helps me to find reasons for the absolute accomplishment of my goals and also to set big goals. More importantly, it helped me to discard the goals I didn’t find enough reasons for and hang on ton goals I have enough reasons for

iii. “What you get will not make you feel good, but learning how to change your state of mind in an instant will.”

This quote helps me to be happy even if I’ve achieved my set goals; it brought about a shift in my thinking. Now, I don’t wait to achieve my goals to be happy, I make happiness a way of life.

iv. “We can turn any idea into a belief if we just provide enough reference experiences to support it.”

The quotation helped me to strengthen beliefs that empower me by looking for references. For instance, I have looked for references to turn the idea that my sister will gain admission in the university into a belief.

v. “Commit to yourself that, regardless of the environment, you will consistently act as a person who is already achieving the goals you’ve set.”

This quote is important to me because it helped me act as if I already had what I wanted and as a result, I’m attracting people and resources that will help me get what I want. It’s miraculous.

vi. “Limited experiences create a limited life. If you desire enrichment and growth, you must increase your references by pursuing ideas and experiences that wouldn’t be a part of your life if you didn’t consciously seek them out.”

This quote inspired me to take on big responsibilities so that I can have unlimited experience to call upon later in life.

vii. “Don’t expect people to abide by your rules if you don’t clearly communicate what they are.”

I just love this principle, it’s an eye opener. The quote helped me to clearly communicate my values to my partner and get her to do the same. As I write this, our relationship is running smoothly without any friction or conflicting rules and values.

viii. “Invariably, masters are simply those who have more references than the rest of us about what leads to success or frustration in a given area.”

The quote helped me to develop a reference library which I call upon to inspire myself and my team in very challenging times.

ix. “The mark of a true champion is consistency.”

This quote is important to me because I now use it as a mantra to inspire my publication team to always strive to publish consistently because we’ve been out of market for long.

x. “The best time to handle a negative emotion is when you first begin to feel it.”

This quote empowered me to declare myself a murderer of negative emotions, I kill them as soon as they find their way into my mind, thanks to this quote.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

Yes, I completed all of them. The exercise on goal setting was a breakthrough for me, the one on Neuro-Associative Conditioning™ as an eye-opener. And almost all the pages are exercises because the author ended every article with a powerful question.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

I want to say there are thousands of people who know and teach success, but none does it like Anthony Robbins, he has a way of breaking down principles not only for people to understand but to believe and take immediate action. I’m blessed to learn from him through this book.

Ratings:

A. How interesting was it to read? 10
B. How helpful were the contents? 10
C. How easy was it to understand? 10
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 10

How to Win Friends and Influence People
Assessment by Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea that the author conveys in this book is that we can influence people’s behaviours and win them to our way of thinking by sincerely doing things that make them feel important.

2. What are the seven ideas which were personally most important to you and qwhy? List these seven ideas followed by an explanation after each one as to why it was important to you. Use personal examples from your own life.

i. That we should not criticize, condemn, or judge people.

This idea is very important to me because naturally I tend to criticize and judge people especially when they do things that conflict with my values. I erroneously expected them to have the same values as mine. As a result my relationships with people suffered especially with people that mattered most to me.

For instance, my sister kept bad friends (I’m judging already), kept late night and seemed to be heading to no where in life. What did I do? I complained, judged, condemned, yelled and threatened. It didn’t change her. But by changing the approach and stopped judging and criticizing her, she’s become a much better person.

ii. That the only way on earth to influence people to do what we want is to talk about what they want and show them how to get it.

This powerful idea is extremely important to me because it lighted the bulb of understanding in my head. I have often wondered why people don’t do the things I want, when I ask them to.

For instance, I was asked to help raise funds and organize an album launch by my friend. I send texts to some “big” men in my church asking them to help me out. They showed initially interest. But after the first meeting, whenever I call meetings, nobody shows up; they are busy with what is more important to them. Naturally, I was not pleased.

This idea make it dawned on me that what people care about are themselves and themselves alone, that if I really want to succeed at getting them to do what I want, I should talk about what they want and show them how to get it.

iii. That we should be genuinely interested in people.

This idea is important to me because as a result of implementing it, I have observed a remarkable increase in people liking me. And I must say that before I got to know this principle, I succeeded in turning people off, I succeeded in putting away people from me because I was not interested in them. I was only interested in myself.

For instance, my fiancée invited me to the wedding ceremony of her cousin. Personally, I had no iota of interest. I should be busy working on the myriad of projects on my table than spend money and time on things that won’t get me closer to the attainment of my goals.

But after getting to know this principle, I became very interested; I asked her questions about what my presence at the wedding will mean to her, the dress code, the venue, and so on. I set my alarm and was even the one reminding her of the date. Her attitude towards me changed for the best since then.

iv. That we should avoid arguments with people.

This idea is important to me because it is really going to help me greatly in my human relationships. In my family, in my business, in the workplace, in the church, in the associations I belong, I often find myself in a position where I’m right and others are wrong. And I’m always tempted to argue.

For example, recently in the church I fellowship with, some group of people were causing serious problems in the leadership that wanted to tear the church apart. I was very annoyed. I felt I had a duty to maintain the unity so I engaged some of the leaders in a discussion. I argued with the first person I spoke to. I discovered that the more I quote the Bible to support that what they were doing was wrong (which was obvious even to them), the more he countered everything I said and defended himself.

But when I changed my approached when I spoke to others by finding points we both agree on, I discovered we were getting towards resolving the problem.

v. That we should show respect for the other person’s opinions and never tell people they are wrong.

This idea is important to me because it helped me to get into other people’s world and think how they think and feel how they feel instead of rushing to tell them they are wrong.

For instance, in some of the ministry works I do that has mainly to do with persuading people to change their beliefs. My fellow workers often tell people they are wrong and this has resulted in a negative image for us and nothing significant is happening.

I find this idea very important because I’m going to leverage it to cause a revolution.

vi. That we should always begin in a friendly way whenever we want to correct somebody or make peace.

This idea is important to me because it has added to my skill set as far as human relations is concerned and I’m already using it to make a difference in people’s lives.

For instance, recently, my brother told me the management of their company wants to cut their salary because according to them they were paying them the current salary in error. He was apprehensive and unhappy. He then asked me to help write a letter to their management to maintain the status quo.

In writing the letter, I used the principle by beginning in a friendly way. I wished I could wait to get the result before sending this assessment.

vii. That we should let the other person feel that what we want them to do is their own idea.

This idea is important to me because it has proven to be a guaranteed way to get people to do what I want. I have a lot of negotiation projects that I will implement this powerful idea. Projects like resolving the problem in the church where I fellowship, raising fund for the club I coordinate, and so on.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

Putting myself in other people’s shoes. Refraining from criticizing, judging and condemning people. Avoiding arguments at all cost and being genuinely interested in other people. These ideas are also going to help me underly my relationships with making people feel important. By diligently applying these principles I believe it will reduce violent communication and inspire others to communicate and relate in ways that will enhance the well-being of others.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “Criticism is futile because it puts a person on the defensive and usually makes him strive to justify himself. Criticism is dangerous because it wounds a person’s precious pride, hurts his sense of importance, and arouses resentment.”

This statement is important to me because it give compelling reasons to make “no criticism” my personal human relations mantra.

ii. “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.”

This statement is important to me because it is going to help me make remarkable improvements in my relationships especially with great people I’m dying to develop relationships with.

iii. “Your smile is a messenger of your goodwill. Your smile brightens the lives of all who see it.”

It serves as a gentle reminder to me to always employ this powerful body language to my advantage.

iv. “The average person is interested in his or her own name than in all other names on earth put together.”

It’s going to help me avoid committing the blunder of forgetting people’s name which I have not been taking so serious.

v. “Be an attentive listener. To be interesting, be interested. Ask questions that other people will enjoy answering. Encourage them to talk about themselves and their accomplishments.”

I’ve been guilty of not paying quality attention to people when they talk to me. This statement is going to help me turn things around.”

vi. “A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still.”

It convinces me not to argue with people or tell them they are wrong.

vii. “You never get into trouble by admitting that you may be wrong. That will stop all argument and inspire your opponent to be just as fair and open and broad-minded as you are. It will make him want to admit that he, too, may be wrong.”

It works; I’ve tried it time and time again.

viii. “In talking with people, don’t begin by discussing the things on which you differ. Begin by emphasizing – and keep on emphasizing – the things on which you agree. Keep emphasizing, if possible, that you are both striving for the same end and that your only difference is one of method and not of purpose.”

It gives me a powerful principle to use in designing my negotiation project system.

ix. “Get a student to say “No” at the beginning, or a customer, child, husband, or wife, and it takes the wisdom and the patience of angels to transform that bristling negative into an affirmation.”

It will help me to be more careful about the specific questions and statements I make in the beginning stages of my communications and even throughout the entire communication.

x. “No one likes to feel he or she is being sold something or told to do a thing. We much prefer to feel that we are buying of our own accord or acting on our own ideas. We like to be consulted about our wishes, our wants, our thoughts.”

This will help me a great deal whenever I’m making any request.

xi. “Other people may be totally wrong, but they don’t think so.”

I noted this because I observe it to be true. It happens to me, I know I may be wrong in some things, but I don’t think so. This gives me something to chew one when dealing with other human beings like me.

xii. “The people who come to you irritated, bigoted, unreasoning, deserve very little discredit for being what they are. Feel sorry for the “poor devil.” Pity them, sympathize with them. Say to yourself: “There, but for the grace of God, go I.””

This quotation is amazing! It got the whole of my attention. It’s going to help me a lot in empathizing with other people especially in my close family relationships.

xiii. “A person usually has two reasons for doing a thing: one that sounds good and a real one. The person himself will think of the real reason. You don’t need to emphasize that. But all of us, being idealists at heart, like to think of motives that sound good. So, in order to change people, appeal to their nobler motives.”

It’s provides yet another principle to add to my persuasion project system.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6 . Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

The book didn’t contain any exercise for the reader to complete.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Ratings:

The New Dynamics of Winning
Assessment by Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea that the author conveys in this book is that there is a psychological component of achievement which is the ability to access our inner resources.

i. That I should break my goals down into smaller parts.

This idea is very important to me because I used it to accomplish some of my goals late last year and I’m still using it. For instance, I broke down reading IIGL study books into chapters and few pages to read per day. With this approach I was able to finish reading the books faster than I usually did. And I’ve set a goal to graduate this year from IIGL.

ii. That I should view my mistakes as corrective feedbacks to get me back on track.

This idea is important to me because I always dwell on the mistakes I make on my road to success rather than focus on the things I did right. This quote now helps me to represent mistakes I make as necessary feedbacks without which I will not reach my set goals.

For instance, I recently made a blunder in a public presentation I made. Instead of brooding over it, I look for the lessons to be learned. And I felt better as a result of taking that approach.

iii. That as a leader I should never punish mistakes.

This quote ran contrary to what I believed all along. It is important to me because it will help me become a better people manager.

For instance, two members of my team made some grave mistakes that rubbished the entire team. I was tempted several times to call a meeting and rebuke them publicly. But I controlled myself and rather chose to talk to them privately.

iv. That I should politely refuse activities for which I have no time, no talent, or no real interest.

This idea is going help me focus and maximize my time by learning to say no. For instance, I was recently approached by a client to coach him and he promised to pay me handsomely. I was tempted to dump what I doing temporarily to take up the offer, but I politely turned it down so I can focus on the many projects on my desk.

v. That I should become aware of my own negative self-talk and stop it in its tracks.

This idea is important to me because it helped me to apply the principles I learnt from the book How to Win Friends and Influence People in internal conversations with myself.

For example, there is a big seminar I want to hold this year compared to the ones I’ve been hosting before. I targeted having 500 people in attendance. I kept seeing obstacles, but this idea helped me to turn it around. Now, I’m on course, come what may.

vi. That I should learn from the experts.

This idea is important to me because I have mentors but rarely go to them to learn from them. With this gentle reminder, I’ve lined up several things I’m going to consult my mentors for this year.

vii. Get comfortable with the unfamiliar; put your TV in a closet for a month.

This idea is important to me because I have applied it and it’s worked wonders. Though not by putting my TV in a closet (I’ve since overcome the distraction of TV, I rarely watch TV), but my phone. I have learned to put off my phone for a day on a weekly basis. The result has been positive, in that it helps me avoid distractions

I hope to graduate to weekly, then monthly, then to do away with going about with any phone at all. I plan to hire someone else to answer my phones.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

They are going to help me look inward instead of outward in the process of achieving my goals. In my daily and personal life, I will question myself after every action if it is the best I can do. In creating a better world, these ideas are going to help me get along well with others and help me bring out the best in people even if they don’t believe in themselves.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

(i) “Most of our hurdles in life are self-imposed limitations that can be overcome if we never, ever give up on ourselves.”

This quote is important to me because it will help me think big – one thing I’ve not really been practicing as a habit.

(ii) “There are no mistakes or failures, only lessons. The failed attempts can be as much a part of the success process as the attempt that finally succeeds.”

This quote now helps me represent so-called failures and mistakes as lessons which now empower me rather than be disempowered by them.

(iii) “Don’t compare yourself to others. Competition should be viewed as a way to maintain excellence, to keep yourself performing up to your own potential.”

This quote is important because I usually compare myself to others and I’m surrounded by folks who “specialize” in comparing themselves to others a lot. It’s going to help me stop it and help them and I set our own internal standards of excellence.

(iv) “The most important conversations, briefings, meetings, and lectures you will ever have are those that you hold in the privacy of your own mind.”

This powerful quotation is going to help be to be careful of how I talk with myself. Now, I will rather not talk to myself at all than talk rudely or negatively to myself.

(v) “What you see is who you’ll become.”

This quote will help me imagine the kind of person I want to become rather than what I don’t want to become.

(vi) “During an actual performance, champions are simply pushing the playback button to access their physical and mental preparation.”

This quote is important to me because it will help me to always give more time to mental preparation than physical preparation.

(vii) “A high expectation of success is more important than natural ability or the lack thereof. It’s more important than practice or preparation. This has been proven in any number of controlled experiments.”

This quote is going to help me to always expect nothing short of extraordinary feats in any endeavour I undertake.

(viii) “At the world-class level in any field, it truly is mind over muscle, mind over competition, mind over everything.”

This quote is really important to me, because when I look at myself, I’ve got no muscle or any physical advantage. This quote is going to help me smile and launch at any big project with confidence because I now know how to run the most important component of winning – my mind!

(ix) “Champions dominate and focus their thoughts and energy on the desired result, and they move toward it. They are propelled by desire, not compelled by fear.”

This quote is important to me, because before now, when I set goals I base my reasons for wanting to absolutely accomplish the goals on what I fear, on what I don’t want. And the results have been far from desiring. This quote will help me focus on what I desire because I now learn that what I focus on is what I’ll get.

(x) “When you enroll in a class, get your money’s worth. Never take a seat in the back of the room. Winners sit up front. From the first row, you can interact with the instructors, see and hear from the best vantage point, be noticed when you raise your hand, and be in a position to ask more personal questions immediately following the session.”

This quote is important to me because I always seat in the middle or back and I easily get distracted a lot. This quote will help me maximize my time and money in any class I attend.

(xi) “The job of a corporate leader is to set a mission, decide upon a strategic direction, achieve the necessary cooperation, delegate authority – and then leave people alone.”

This quote is important to me because it will help me delegate and leave people alone to get the job done.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6 . Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

Yes, I completed the 21-day plan and I did find it fairly useful.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Ratings:

A. How interesting was it to read? 9
B. How helpful were the contents? 9
C. How easy was it to understand? 9
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 8

Real Magic
Assessment by Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea that the author conveys in this book is that we are spiritual beings with human experience capable of creating miracles using our thoughts.

i. That I should keep track of how many scarcity thoughts I have versus prosperity thoughts I have, then surrender and stop fretting about it.

This idea is important to me because it will help me to monitor and be aware of the kind of thoughts I think and to reflect about the thoughts that brought me to where I am today.

For instance, immediately after reading this idea, a scarcity thought came to my mind about a certain project I was working on, I immediately countered it with an abundance thought.

ii. That what I think and talk about expands into action.

This idea is important to me in so many ways. One of them is that, I’m now conscious of what I think about, especially conscious of thinking about the things I don’t want. Another one is learning not to focus on my weaknesses.

For instance, I observe that before, when I prepare to speak in public, I think about my weaknesses, and when I get on the platform, it is my weakness that I display. Secondly, there was a time I dwelt so much on sickness. I visualized people coming to visit me in the hospital and me getting all the love and care. Amazingly, it happened!

This idea has helped me to think only about the things I want and not the things I don’t want. And to think on my strengths rather than my weaknesses.

iii. That I should stay focused on what I am for rather than what I’m against it.

This idea is important to me because it’s already causing a great paradigm shift in my life and the way I think.

For instance, I no longer talk against mediocrity, rather I preach excellence. I no longer talk about a political leader I don’t want, I talk about the kind of leader we need for our country. I can’t join people to protest against certain leaders and policies; I join campaign for certain leaders and policies I support.

iv. That everything I already need I already have.

Wow! What an idea. It is so important to me because I have always been thinking that there is something missing in my life that’s responsible for me not achieving the main goals I want to achieve.

But this idea helps me to know better. That I am complete, I am a total person, I am already that miracle I’m seeking. That when it’s time for me to die, I won’t say, “Wait Lord, I still got some degrees to earn in school, I still got some skills to acquire.” No, I got to go.

v. That I should give myself a daily gift of a quiet place and quiet hour to meditate.

This idea is important to me because I have been practicing it and it has literally transformed my life. I have resolved difficult riddles of life facing me during meditation. I have generated life-changing ideas during meditation. I feel relaxed and more healthy and happier after each meditation. It’s an amazing gift, it’s an amazing idea.

vi. That I should ask nothing of anyone and practice unconditional acceptance.

This idea is important to me because it came right when I was angry because I needed something from my sister and I couldn’t get it. I was so annoyed that I put my phone off the hook for days.

This idea worked so much on me that I called her and apologize and told her that I now realize that even though she’s my sister, it doesn’t mean she owes me something, that I love and accept her exactly the way she is. That pretty much ended everything.

vii. That I should treat others as if the fullness of God resided within them.

This idea is important to me because it transformed my relationship with people. It changed the stereotypical thinking I had of certain people. I now saw them in a new light.

For instance, there is a member of my church with bad mannerisms that people make jest of and avoid. But I chose to spend time with him, talk with him, and show him love because I see the fullness of God residing within him. As a result, he shares so many intimate things with me and feel loved.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

The ideas and lessons are going to help me meditate daily, pray daily, see myself as a spiritual being. It is going to help me touch the world in a great way by focusing and acting on what I am for rather than on what I’m against.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

(i) “There are no limits to what you can create in your mind during your meditative hours. You can consult anyone, create their presence right there in your mind, and come to rely upon that guidance at will.”

This quote is important to me because it’s already empowered me to solve seemingly impossible situations during my meditative hours.

(ii) “If you are not generous when it is difficult, you won’t be generous when it is easy. You must be willing to give to others, even when your coffer is not full, for this is your purpose.”

This quote is important to me because I have been postponing giving to the people I put down on my giving list because I thought I don’t have enough. But now I have begin giving to them from the “little” I have as a result of this quote.

(iii) “I figure if I can talk to God and call it prayer, believing in such a universal divine presence, then there is nothing loony about having God talk to me.”

This quote is important to me because it has helped me to listen to God for direction.

(iv) “The non spiritual being hates evil, and is determined to eradicate that which he believes to be evil. The spiritual being knows that everything that he hates and fights weakens him, and all that he is for, all that he supports, empowers him.”

This quote is important to me because it has helped me to focus on what I support and not fight what I hate. And the results have been wonderful.

(v) “Most conflicts arise from a need to control someone or to prove that you are right and the other person is wrong. If you can give up the need to control as well as the need to be right just once in your own private practice session, then you will be able to empower another person in a unique way.”

This quote is important to me because it has helped me to relate better with people by finding areas of agreement with them and avoiding things we disagree on.

(vi) “There is no way to prosperity, prosperity is the way.”

This quote is important to me because I’ve always thought there is some magic formula I need to apply to prosper. But I now know I already got all I need to prosper.

(vii) “When you trust in yourself, you trust in the wisdom that created you. And obviously, when you doubt yourself, you question that same divine intelligence that brought you here!”

This quote is important to me because it has boosted my self-esteem by acknowledging that I was created by a divine intelligence and I don’t have to question that supreme intelligence by doubting myself.

(viii) “The spiritual partnership is a relationship of equals. No one needs to be proven wrong. There is no “right” way or “winning” argument. Each person has the right to his or her own point of view.”

This quote is important to me because it’s helping me in my relationship with my fiancée. I don’t see myself as superior to her but as equals, and interestingly, we hardly have disagreements because of taking this approach.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

No.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

No.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Ratings:

Goal Setting 101
Assessment by Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

That there are fundamental techniques for setting goals that ensure goals will be achieved.

i. That I should use SWOT analysis in goal setting

This idea is important to me because I have always known SWOT analysis to be used in business analysis. It opened my understanding and helped me to discover my strengths and weaknesses; threats and opportunities in the goals I set for 2011 and 2012.

For instance, I used it in my 2012 marriage goal and I was particularly grateful for the threats the analysis revealed. And I consequently strategize to effectively deal with the threats.

ii. That I should implement now and perfect later

This idea is important to me because I was hesitating on going ahead with an important task on my seminar project. I wanted to be perfect before launching out. The idea gave me the inspiration to move ahead and perfect later. Looking back, I am so grateful I went ahead because other things fell into place as a result of me taking a step.

iii. That I should focus! Focus! Focus!

This idea is important to me because not focusing has been my major weakness. I usually dabble into several things at the same time. I generate great ideas with reckless abandon and believe I should work on them or the guy next door will beat me to it. As a result, I perform below my potentials.

This idea came as a reminder to me and I have since cut down my involvement in many projects regardless of the financial rewards. For instance, I turned down about four juicy business proposals to focus on the nationwide seminar I’m hosting on March 19, 2011.

iv. That I should say and think the following effective phrases to bolster confidence:

“I can! I choose to do this! I am responsible! You can count on me! Give it to me; I’ll get it done! I’m on top of it! I give you my word! You’ve come to the right place! Let’s get started! It’s a done deal!”

This idea is important to me because as a leader I need these words to inspire confidence in my people.

For instance, I was asked to deliver some important package and I sent a member of my team to do that. Two weeks later, I got a call from the person who asked me to deliver the package that the package was not delivered and he talked roughly on the phone with me, obviously offended. I was not happy, even at that, I remembered to use three of the effective phrases to calm the situation.

I used the phrases: I am responsible, I’m on top of it, I give you my word! And I got busy and subsequently resolved the issue.

v. That it is better for me to run toward a goal than away from fear

This idea is important to me because it caused a positive shift in my goal-setting system. Before now, I used to set goals that I want to move away from, and I wonder why the things I run away from are the things I get.

For instance, I set goals to move away from debts, but I sank deeper and deeper into debts.

vi. That I should maintain momentum

This idea is important to me because there are remarkable things I have achieved before but didn’t capitalize on them to launch myself. As a result, I often return to square zero, all because I didn’t maintain momentum. Looking back, I can see my mistakes and make corrections.

For instance, I once wrote an article that was published and ranked 7th in the world in a popular website, but I never maintained that moment. I stopped writing and went into oblivion.

vii. That I should celebrate my accomplishments

This idea is important to me because it gave me an idea on how I can deliberately leverage the Law of Attraction by sending more and more positive feelings and vibrations out in order to get more and more of it.

Now, I not only celebrate my own accomplishments but also that of others. For instance, a friend of mine recently got a job after many months in the unemployment market, I screamed and leapt for joy as if I was the one who got the job. And when someone sent me some money I wasn’t expecting, I danced and rolled on the ground in my house.

Now, anytime my people hear me shout, they I have accomplished something. I even celebrate seemingly minor things like a call from someone enquiring about my product or my sister registration for examination.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

The ideas and lessons are going to help me analyze the strengths, weaknesses, threats and opportunities of any project I’m embarking on. They’ll also help me to choose my words carefully in communication with myself and others. By being conscious of the way I communicate with people, I believe it can help create a better world.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “Every thought, decision, and action moves you closer to or further from your goals.”

This statement is important to me because whenever I think and take decisions and remember this statement, my goals come to mind and how badly I want the goals accomplished. As a result I alter negative thoughts and reverse decisions that draw me back in order to move closer to the accomplishment of my goals.

ii. “Just as chess has its rules, so does the game of life. And while knowing a game’s rules does not guarantee that you’ll win every match, disregarding the rules makes playing the game difficult and winning impossible.”

This idea is important to me because it made me to understand and appreciate the importance of the rules I should keep in life if I want to succeed, for instance, persisting and taking many steps in the direction of my goals.

iii. “You cannot afford to wait for the perfect conditions. Goal setting is often a matter of balancing timing against available resources. Opportunities are easily lost while waiting for perfect conditions.”

This statement is important to me because sometimes I wait for everything to fall into place before taking a step. For instance, in getting married, I wanted to build a house first, get Toyota Armada, and sit on top of a multi-million dollar business.

iv. “Nothing of any lasting value was ever created by someone who was reasonable. It is the unreasonable people, those discontented with the status quo, the dreamers and visionaries who nevertheless have their feet planted firmly on solid ground, who improve people’s lives and advance society.”

This statement is important to me because it describes me and gave me more confidence and courage to keep pressing on. I have come under many ridicules and discouragements from people who are supposed to encourage me. But I don’t care.

v. “Effective goal setting is consultative, it does not squander – it leverages – all available brainpower.”

This statement is important to me because it ministered to me at a crucial time I was about to set a team goal alone without involving my team members.

vi. “You will never lack for nay-sayers to tell you that all is lost or that you are beaten. Don’t join the party! Exhaust all alternatives. Victory and defeat are rarely absolutes.”

Touché! That is what I say to that quote. It is important to me because it prepares my mind in advance to face the obstacles I will encounter on my road to success.

vii. “If you don’t let it devastate you, failure can be an opportunity: for learning, for recovery, for the creation and demonstration of character.”

This statement is important to me because it enables me to interpret so-called failure in a way that empowers me.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

No.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

Yes.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Ratings:

A. How interesting was it to read? 6
B. How helpful were the contents? 7
C. How easy was it to understand? 9
D. Would you recommend it to others? 8
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 7

Goals!
Assessment by Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

That the ability to decide exactly what you want, write it down, make a plan, and then execute the plan is the key to personal effectiveness and high achievement.

i. That I should think long-term

This idea is important to me because it affected almost every decision I took in a positive way.

For instance, I have invested a lot of money into my business and forgoing so many gratifications now. I have gone out of my way to help people even at my own disadvantage now, knowing that it will pay off big-time in future.

ii. That I should use project-planning model to plan how I will accomplish my goals

This idea is important to me because it enabled me to see my goals as if they were already accomplished. As a result, my confidence was bolstered and I got into the thick of things with excitement and strong conviction.

For instance, the process of getting married now seem very achievable to me because of using this model to lay everything out.

iii. That I should plan everyday in advance, preferably, the night before

This idea is important to me because it helped me to become more organized and easily get things done.

For instance, there was a difficult task I wanted to do the next day. I wrote it down on my to-do list for the next day just before sleeping off. I meditated on it a little. And in my dream, the solution was revealed to me. This idea works like magic.

iv. That I should set measures for my goals

This idea is important to me because it provided me with a tip to make me believe I can accomplish my goals. And belief is a crucial element in accomplishing goals.

For example, I set the number of people I want to attend my seminar. And I broke it to different locations. I discovered I only need 3 people per location to meet the target. Everything seemed so easy and achievable and my mental pictures changed from negative to positive.

v. The way to develop courage and confidence is with knowledge and skill

This idea is important to me because it provided me with another device to inspire believe and conviction in my projects. I would have started so many big things if not for many limiting beliefs. This idea opened my eyes to the fact that I can overcome them by acquiring knowledge and skill in the key areas I’m having doubts.

For instance, in placing full page advert in a national daily for one of my products, I doubted if I will recoup the enormous investment I wanted to put into it.

vi. Conduct an honest analysis of my situation by speaking to people in my family and relationship circles

This idea is important to me because it helped me improve my relationships. The author suggested I ask my people these four questions.

1. Is there anything that I am doing that you would like me to do more of?
2. Is there anything that I am doing that you would like me to do less of?
3. Is there anything I am not doing that you would like me to start doing?
4. Is there anything that I am doing that you would like me to stop doing altogether?

When I did I was shocked at what my people said about me. For instance, I was told I projected myself as a know-it-all person. I was very shocked because the reverse is what I work on everyday. I subsequently made changes and altered my people’s negative perception of me.

vii. That if I want to be one of the top people in my business, I should dress like the top people, groom myself like the top people, and organize my work habits the way they do.

This idea is important to me because it changed the way I dress, talk, groom myself, walk, and do things. I dress like Mr. President, walk like Mr. President, and always ask what Mr. President would do in the situations I find myself because I want to become Mr. President. The result has been nothing short of phenomenal.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

The ideas and lessons are going to help me set goals on my finances, relationships, health, business, and career. And it’s going to make me serve as a role model to upcoming generation.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “There is a direct relationship between the number of things you attempt and your accomplishments in life.”

This statement is important to me because it make me realize that the more attempts I make, the more my chances of achieving my goals.

ii. “One quality that successful people have in common is their willingness to actually start with no guarantee of success, as opposed to continually talking about it.”

This statement is important to me because it moved me into action on a certain business I’ve been dragging my feet on.

iii. “The more you can completely relax and let go, both mentally and physically, the more rapidly your superconscious mind will click into action and begin giving you the ideas and insights that you need.”

This statement is important to me because it opened my understanding to the power of the superconscious mind and how it works and how to leverage it for breakthrough.

iv. “Your superconscious mind is stimulated by clear, written, specific goals, intensely desired, visualized regularly, and constantly worked toward. Whenever you relax, visualize, and emotionalize a specific result that you intensely desire, you stimulate your superconscious mind into giving you ideas and energy for goal attainment.”

This statement is important to me because it gave me more reasons to set goals, and to relax, visualize and emotionalize.

v. “As you read your local newspapers, make a list of the top people in your community. Assemble the names, titles, and businesses of one hundred of the “players” in your city. As you gather these names, write each of these people a letter and send a copy of a small book, a poem, a newspaper clipping, or anything that might be of interest to the person, based on what you have read about him or her.”

This statement is important to me because it gave me a powerful way to network with the top minds in my industry.

vii. “If you read fifteen minutes each evening, rather than watching television, you could complete about fifteen books per year. If you read the great classics of English literature for fifteen minutes each day, in seven years you could complete the one hundred greatest books ever written. You could be one of the best-educated and most erudite people of your generation.”

This statement is important to me because it provided me with a formula to become one of the best educated people of my generation. And that has been my goal.

viii. “As you set your goals and begin moving toward them, it is essential that you establish a series of benchmarks or measures that you can use to evaluate your progress, day by day and hour by hour. The more clear and specific the measures you set, the more accurate you will be in hitting your targets on schedule.”

This statement is important to me because it added a key principle to my goal setting system.

ix. “Every minute spent in planning saves 10 minutes in execution.”

This statement is important to me because it gave reason to spend more time in detailed planning.

x. “Successful people fail far more often than unsuccessful people. Successful people try more things, fall down, pick themselves up, and try again – over and over again – before they finally win. Unsuccessful people try a few things, if they try at all, and very soon quit and go back to what they were doing before.”

This statement is important to me because it encouraged me to keep pressing on regardless of setbacks. I have had many setbacks, this quote helped me to understand that I have the habit of successful people.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

No.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

Yes.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Ratings:

A. How interesting was it to read? 8
B. How helpful were the contents? 8
C. How easy was it to understand? 9
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 9

Law of Attraction
Assessment by Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

That we attract to our lives whatever we give our attention, energy, and focus to, whether positive or negative.

i. Whenever I hear myself stating a negative belief (or having doubt), I should use the formula below to remove my doubt:

– Start by asking myself if there’s anyone currently doing what I want to do or having what I want.

– If so, then how many people have been doing this today? Yesterday? Last week? Last month? Last year?

– Write my statement in general terms (3rd person), because making reference to myself may create more doubt.

– Ensure the statements are plausible.

This idea is important to me because I have a lot of negative beliefs and self-doubts that have been holding me back from becoming the champion I was born to be. In using this formula, I have eliminated all doubts and self-limiting beliefs and anytime any doubt flashes into my mind unconsciously, I use the formula to murder it.

Additionally, I have used it on some people I’m mentoring and it has really been useful. It’s a breakthrough formula.

For instance, I wanted to start a bookstore that will be ubiquitous like fast food restaurants, but I kept dragging myself back with doubts about my ability, about the enormous capital, and so on. But with this formula, I have taken steps and doors are opening in amazing fashion.

ii. Record evidence of my abundant-ness

This idea is very important to me because it gives me enormous confidence and faith and courage to move on, on my major definite goal.

To implement this idea immediately, I bought a notebook, where I record every evidence of things that happened during the day that prove that my goals can be accomplished. I record every door that opened that I never imagine will open.

For instance, someone called me outside of the state I reside (Lagos) to come and speak in a big seminar, I recorded it. A gospel minister saw my advert and sent me cash to support my project without me asking for it, I put it down. A friend gave me two books that turned out to be miracles and so valuable to my project, I wrote it down. I can go on and on. Needless to say, the notebook is full and I guard it with my life.

Anytime I feel doubt or angry or unhappy for any reason, I simply open the notebook and immerse myself in it and soon enough I’ll be engulfed with strong feelings of happiness, joy, excitement, and gratitude.

iii. That I should create a void or vacuum

This idea is important to me because it enables me to attract into my life anything I want. As the author observed, “A void or vacuum is always waiting to be filled.”

For instance, I have created a fund for myself to help me out in my personal development – nothing is there yet, but surely, things are happening. I have equally created a fund to help others and I’m confident, it will overflow with abundance. All these wouldn’t have happened if I didn’t discover this idea.

iv. That I should always say yes to money and favours

This idea is important to me because it had a dramatic effect on me. Before now, I used to humbly turn down favours as a cultural practice. If I was offered money, say for my transportation, I will say not to worry, I’ll be fine. Not again!

I now accept even the smallest unit of money. I accept all favours. And I have observed that more and more favours are coming into my life.

For instance, whenever I meet with someone in restaurant maybe for a business meeting, he or she will offer to buy our food, I will encourage him to do so rather than claim “big boy” and offer to foot the bill like I use to do before.

v. That I should not talk about my flops

This idea is important to me because I never knew that talking about my flops and perceived failures attracted more flops and failures into my life. I now know that my talking about my flops I send more negative energy to the atmosphere and it will return back to me.

For instance, I applied for a loan with the bank and it didn’t work out, I simply picked up myself and moved on. I didn’t tell anyone except when they ask, I simply reply that it fell through and that I will reapply. And when a handbill for my seminar was cut short, I decided not to tell people about it and I forgot about it altogether.

vi. That each time I hear myself using don’t, not or no, I should ask myself, “So what do I want?”

This idea is important to me because it helps me snap out of mental ruts with the speed of lightning. The immediate effect and the ability to apply it anytime, anywhere without opening a book or using any tool are the things that particularly make this idea important to me.

Also, I have used this idea to break people’s negative patterns during my discussion with people and consulting sessions. For instance, a lady (one of my acquaintances) came to me for advice concerning the challenges she was facing in her relationship. She took almost 30 minutes to narrate the ordeal she was going through.

As a result, she felt so sad, her breathing became shallow, and her body was tense. To break her negative state, I employed this very simple question, “So, what do you want?” That shifted everything from worst to great. When she began talking about what she wanted, she was filled with excitement.

vii. State affirmations starting with “I’m in the process of…”

This idea is important to me because it helped me identify why I am not where I’m destined to be. It gave me an aha! feeling.

I am a keen student and promoter of affirmation, but I soon stop when things were turning out the other way round. I affirmed things I doubted. But with this idea of stating affirmations starting with “I’m in the process of…,” things have gone from ordinary to extraordinary.

For instance, whenever I affirmed financial freedom, I used to feel negative. Now, I simply say, “I’m in the process of attaining financial freedom.” And that has been the difference-maker for me.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

The ideas and lessons are going to help me deliberately give my attention, energy, and focus to the positive things I want in my relationships, businesses, work, and so on.

By choosing to focus on what I want and helping others to do so, I believe it will reach a point where our collective thoughts will bring about a positive revolution and thereby help create a better world.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

(i) “We are always sending out a vibration.”

This statement is important to me because it will help me to be conscious about how I feel and talk about situations.

(ii) “While observing, you are sending a vibration, either positive or negative.”

This statement is important to me because I used to think I’m a positive thinker. But I was floored by this realization. I never knew that by simply observing something, I’m sending out a vibration – positive or negative.

(iii) “Your unconscious and conscious mind automatically filters out the words don’t, not, and no.”

This statement is important to me because it make me conscious of these three words and try to eliminate it as much as possible in communications with myself and other people.

(iv) “When your words change, your vibration changes, and the best news of all is that you can only send out one vibration at a time.”

This statement is important to me because it gave me the push to have a collection of words to use and the ones to eliminate altogether from my vocabulary in certain situations in order to attain that which I want.

(v) “The Law of Attraction doesn’t recognize what action you’re taking that’s causing you to generate vibration. You might be remembering, or pretending, or daydreaming or just merely observing.”

Wow! This statement is important to me because I joke a lot, I pretend a lot. And funny enough, the things I joke about always come to pass – most of the time, negative things. So, this statement became a game-changer for me.

(vi) “By observing contrast and identifying as something you don’t want, you become clear about what you do want.”

This statement is important to me because it enabled me understand the place of the things I don’t want, that they help me become clear about what I want.

(vii) “A positive affirmation can have a negative vibration.”

This statement is important to me because like I noted earlier, most of positive affirmation worked against me rather than for me. But by adding just few words and making a change to how I state my affirmations, things turned around in my favour.

(viii) “Using the word “ideal” is important. Referring to an ideal mate, or ideal health, or ideal career, allows you to talk about it now, thus enabling you to include it in your current vibration.”

This statement is important to me because it gave me a new powerful, difference-making word to add to my communication vocabulary.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

Yes. The author wrote that “The Law of Attraction doesn’t remember what vibration you were sending out five minutes ago, five days ago, five months ago or 50 years ago. It’s only responding to the vibration you are sending out right now in this very moment and giving you more of the same.”

I want to ask about the intensity of the vibration I sent out years ago and the one I’m sending out right now. If the intensity of vibration I sent out years ago is stronger than the intensity of the vibration I’m sending out right now, wouldn’t I still get what I sent out five years ago? Or doesn’t intensity count?

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

Yes.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

Yes, I’ll like to comment on the word the author chose to use on page 37. He used the word “selfish” to describe feeling good about oneself in all areas of life. Though he later equated selfish to self-care, but he asked questions like: “Are you selfish about what you eat? Are you selfish about what you wear?” And so on.

May I say that the word “selfish” is generally negative and have some negative emotions attached to it. Self-love or self-care would have been better and selfish not used at all. The word triggered some negative emotions in me and also did for someone I gave the book to read.

Ratings:

The Power of Intention
Assessment by Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

That there is a force in the universe known as intention that allows us to create miracles, healings, manifestations, and so on, and everything is connected to it, but our ego disconnects us from this force, and we can reconnect back to this force by aligning our thoughts with how this force thinks.

i. That I should surrender totally to intention.

This idea is important to me because it reminds me to allow intention to work on my behalf without my interference. In other words, I should let go and let God.

In my life, I have questioned the possibility of so many things, for example, healing an illness which the medical community says is inherited and doesn’t have cure. This idea will enable me to catch myself doubting and then surrender to the perfect force of intention.

ii. That I should be kind toward myself, others, and all of life.

This idea is important to me because kindness is one of those qualities I couldn’t define or picture due to its abstract nature. But the author helped me to understand it better by giving several examples of kindness and the power of kindness. These examples triggered off so many ideas of how I can show kindness especially to others.

For example, paying the fares and tickets for people I don’t know and may never meet, showing disabled children love, being kind to animals like dog, hen, and so on.

iii. That I should enhance my energy field with photographs.

This idea is important to me because it teaches me that photographs contain energy – a fact which I have also noticed myself.

With this new knowledge I will change my work environment to a more accommodating place where I will be able to strategically place photographs taken in moments of joy, happiness, and love, and also arrange photographs of nature, animals, and expressions of joy and love in my environment so that their energy can provide me with higher frequency and inspiration.

iv. That I should become conscious of the energy level of music I listen to.

This idea is important to me because I live in a city with no regulation on noise and playing of loud music in public. As a result, I listen to any kind of music whether I like it or not. And at home, because of my tight work schedule, I’ve stopped listening to music altogether.

This idea empowers me to watch out for the kind of music I listen and to return to listening to music – especially inspirational music that reflects my desires in order to lift my spirit and take me to higher levels of energy.

v. That I should seize every opportunity, no matter how small, to give my life away in service.

This idea is important to me because, at times, it is easy for me to focus too much on myself and overlook little ways I can be of service to others.

For instance, a friend of mine wants to wed and he has the challenge of raising funds. I wanted to look the other way and say, “Everyone has got his or her own life to live. Let him sort himself out.” But I had a rethink as a result of this idea to be of service and empower him with “my little knowledge” of raising fund.

vi. That I should not ask to be healed, but rather ask to be restored to that perfection from which I emanated.

This idea is important to me because it gives me the knowing of how healing takes place and how I can heal myself and help heal others. I discovered that there is no such thing as healing; we only have a reconnection of disconnected elements back to the Source.

vii. That I should seek out and cherish the silence.

This idea is important to me because according to the author, many people who have suffered with long-term illnesses have been able to make a reconnection back to the Source through the channel of nature and contemplative silence.

Consequently, I’m planning to go away for weeks to meditate in a natural place where I can make connection with intention. Additionally, this idea empowers me to make silence and meditation a way of lie.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

The ideas and lessons are already helping me to stay on the higher energy level regardless of low-level energy going on around me. I’m happy when people expect me to be sad because of the unpleasant things that happen to me or to my folks. Now, disappointments excite me. I pull people up to my own high-energy level instead of allowing myself to be pulled down to their low-energy level.

Concerning how these ideas and lessons will help me create a better world, they will help me to counterbalance the negativity of at least 90,000 individuals who calibrate at the lower weakening energy levels, because according to Dr. Hawkins’s result of research highlighted by the author, “One individual who lives and vibrates to the energy of optimism and a willingness to be nonjudgmental of others will counterbalance the negativity of 90,000 individuals who calibrate at the lower weakening levels.”

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

(i) “If there’s an omnipresent power of intention that’s not only within me, but in everything and everyone, then we’re connected by this all-pervading Source to everything and everyone, and to what we’d like to be, what we’d like to have, what we want to achieve, and to everything in the universe that will assist us. All that’s required is realigning ourselves and activating intention. But how did we get disconnected in the first place? How did we lose our natural ability to connect?”

My eyes were opened as a result of this quotation to the fact that I DON’T need to struggle to achieve anything I want to achieve or struggle to become anything I want to become.

(ii) “By allowing ego to determine your life path, you deactivate the power of intention.”

This quote is important to me because it helps me to answer the very important question: “How did we get disconnected in the first place? How did we lose our natural ability to connect?” This will help me put my ego aside so I can reconnect and remain connected to intention.

(iii) “When you form a thought within you that’s commensurate with Spirit, you form a spiritual prototype that connects you to intention and sets into motion the manifestation of your desires.”

This quote is important to me because it helps me to ask the important question anytime I feel that I’ve reached the end of the road in my undertakings: “How will the Spirit think in this situation?”

(iv) “The Spirit reveals itself to everyone with the same intensity and consistency, but only warriors are consistently attuned to such revelations.”

Though this quotation is from Don Juan Matus highlighted by the author in the book, I think it wise to highlight it here as well for the benefits of others who’ll be reading this assessment. The statement is important to me because it has moved me to “stay attuned” to revelations by the Spirit.

(v) “Research has shown that a simple act of kindness directed toward another improves the functioning of the immune system and stimulates the production of serotonin (a naturally occurring substance in the body that makes us feel more comfortable, peaceful, and even blissful) in both the recipient of the kindness and the person extending the kindness. Even more amazing is that persons observing the act of kindness have similar beneficial results.”

This quote is important to me because it compels me to show kindness every day of my waking life.

(vi) “If you aren’t doing what you love and loving what you do, your power of intention is weakened.”

This quote is important to me because it lets me know another way I and the rest of humanity get disconnected from the Source so that I can guard against it and also advise people to do what they love if they want to stay connected to the Source.

(vii) “Seeking beauty in the worst of circumstances with individual intent connects one to the power of intention. The face of beauty is always present, even where others see non-beauty.”

This quote is important to me because it helps me develop a positive attitude and attract more pleasant things into my life.

(viii) “You can’t discover the law of co-creation if you’re contemplating what’s missing. You can’t discover the power of awakening if you’re contemplating things that are still asleep. The Wright brothers didn’t contemplate the staying on the ground of things. Alexander Graham Bell didn’t contemplate the non-communication of things. Thomas Edison didn’t contemplate the darkness of things.”

This quote is important to me because it will help me not to think about the things that are missing in my life but how to get the things I want.

(ix) “Having a strong will and being filled with resolve to accomplish inner goals is asking ego to be the guiding force in your life. I will do this thing, I will never be stupid, I will never give up. These are admirable traits, but they won’t reconnect you to intention. Your willpower is so much less effective than your imagination, which is your link to the power of intention.”

This quote is important to me because it helped to understand why I don’t do the things I say “I will” do.

(x) “By shifting in the middle of a weakening thought to one that strengthens, you raise your energy vibration and strengthen yourself and the immediate energy field.”

This quote is important to me because it gave me the relief that I can sometimes think weakening thoughts but the most important thing is to catch myself thinking it and make an immediate shift to thoughts that empower.

(xi) “Harsh, pounding musical vibrations with repetitive, loud sounds lower your energy level and weakens you and your ability to make conscious contact with intention. Similarly, the lyrics of hate, pain, anguish, fear, and violence are low energies sending weakening messages to your subconscious and infiltrating your life with similar attractor energies.”

This quote is important to me because it will help me be conscious of and filter the kind of music I listen to.

(xii) “Prayers, paintings, crystals, statutes, spiritual passages, books, magazines, the colors of your walls, and even the arrangement of your furniture all create energy into which you’re catapulted for at least half of your waking life.”

This powerful quote is important to me because it awakened a desire in me to optimize my surrounding with prayers, paintings, crystals, statutes, spiritual passages, books, magazines, and to be mindful of the colors of my walls, and the arrangement of my furniture.

(xiii) “Place your affirmations in strategic places where you’ll notice and read them throughout the day. For example: I intend to heal myself of this persistent fatigue.”

This statement is important to me because it will help me remember the things I intend to bring to being. I’ve already implemented it and its effect is positively remarkable.

(xiv) “Change the way you look at things, and the things you look at change.”

This quip is important to me because it places the responsibility of bringing about change on my table. It shows that the power to change things lies with me and not with the circumstances I face.

(xv) “You don’t need a reason to be happy… your desire to be so is sufficient.”

This quote is important to me because it will help me to be happy whether I have a reason or not.

(xvi) “You feel good not because the world is right, but your world is right because you feel good.”

This quote is important to me because it help me to take responsibility for the things that happens in “my world.”

(xvii) “In a universe peopled by creative, divine, organizing intelligence … there are simply no accidents.”

This quote has been a game changer for me. Now, any situation I face – whether bad or good – I know they are all working for my own good.

(xviii) “Study and replicate the lives of people who’ve known their purpose. Whom do you admire the most? I urge you to read biographies of these people and explore how they lived and what motivated them to stay on purpose when obstacles surfaced.”

This quote is important to me because it reminds me to buy more books on biographies of great men. The little biographies I’ve read have led me to doing many great things.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

No.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

No.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

Ratings:

A. How interesting was it to read? 8
B. How helpful were the contents? 10
C. How easy was it to understand? 8
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 9

Raising Children Compassionately

Assessment by Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that the best way to raise children is to raise them in a way where they are expected to do things not because of punishment or reward, but because they see it as contributing to their own and other people’s well-being.

i. That I should see my children as human beings and not label them as children.

This idea is very important to me because it has changed the way I now relate to my 4-year old niece under my care and other children. I now see them as another human being. I discover that because I label them as children, I shout at them, command them, and demand that they do this and do that, which haven’t been working for me. For instance, instead of commanding her to stop watching too much TV, I initiate a discussion with her in the simplest language possible to influence her to do something better with her time like painting, reading, and drawing.

ii. That it is not my job (as a parent) to make my children behave in a certain way.

This idea is important to me because my belief that it is my job to make a child behave leads to a lot of frustration when they don’t behave. For instance, getting my 4-year old niece to share things with her friends or even to stop her from using some negative words led to nothing but frustration. Now, I know better that my job is to influence and not change their behavior.

iii. That whenever I want to punish, I should pause and ask myself: “What do I want the child’s reasons to be for acting as I would like him to act?”

This idea is very important to me because I’ve unknowingly been teaching my niece something else and reinforcing it while thinking I was doing her a favour. For instance, when her friends from the neighborhood come to play with her at home, at a point she’ll start beating her friends knowing that I’m around to protect her. After warning her repeatedly, I usually beat her and ask her friends to go home since she doesn’t want them to be around. I thought I was teaching her tolerance, but unknowingly teaching her that someone older than her can force her to do things she doesn’t want to do.

iv. That I should be aware of the important difference between my objective being to get my children to do what I want and being clear that my objective is to create a quality of connection necessary for everyone’s needs to be met.

This idea is important to me because it reveals a fundamental thing I unconsciously want in my relationships, not just with my children but every relationship. And I love fundamentals. So, as a result, whenever I want to ask my niece, or anyone for that matter, to do things I want, I remind myself that my objective is to create a quality of connection necessary for everyone’s needs to be met. Sometimes I even state this objective upfront in my conversations. I used this when I engaged in a crucial conversation with my fiancée when we had a disagreement.

v. That I should not use rewards to get my children to do something but rather to communicate my needs and feelings.

This idea is important to me because I’ve been using rewards to get my niece, my sister, my fiancée, my team members to do things for me. I was so delighted when I learned this principle. Now I sincerely give them gifts when I don’t need them to do anything for me. And when the time comes for me to ask them to do something for me, I simply state my needs and feelings and they connect and do the things for me. As a result, my relationships with them have improved remarkably.

For instance, I ask my younger sister to make some emergency deposit at the bank for me on behalf of a friend. She asked me for reward thinking I was still operating from the paradigm of reward. I stated my need and feelings at that point and she joyfully helped me out.

vi. That I should take my time to communicate in a natural way that’s really in harmony with my values rather than communicate quickly in a habitual noncompassionate way.

This idea is important to me because in my rush to handle things I react in a non compassionate way. But by taking my time, I’ve been able to communicate in a compassionate way. For instance, one afternoon, while writing some articles, my niece was playing loudly with her friend in a way that distracted and disturbed me greatly. I wanted to react by shouting at them to stop disturbing me and stay quiet. But I took my time to rehearse the appropriate compassionate response. Then I stood up and walk to where they were playing, called them aside and communicated my request to them compassionately. They looked at me baffled, then they smiled, and returned back to their play quietly.

vii. That I should love my children unconditionally.

This idea is so important because it transformed every single one of my relationship from the root up, not just with the children. Recently, my little niece fell sick and wouldn’t take her drugs. I was deeply concerned. After spending money repeatedly for drugs and watching her spit it out time and again, I wanted to spank her out of anger. Then I remember this principle: love her unconditionally, regardless of whether she takes her drugs or not. So to prevent her from seeing my love for her as conditional (only when she does what I want), I spent hours persuading her, petting her, and appealing to her. As a result I was late for church that day but was happy that I was able to connect compassionately.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas will help me to see children as human beings just like me and to focus on what I want them to learn whenever I ask them to do something and to create a quality of connection necessary for everyone’s needs to be met. These ideas are going to help me use sincere influence and not manipulate with rewards and punishments and to show love unconditionally and help my children see it as such.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “Anytime it is our objective to get another person to behave in a certain way, people are likely to resist no matter what it is we’re asking for. This seems to be true whether the other person is two or ninety-two years of age.”

This quote is important because I now see the futility of getting people to behave. I remember once I was trying to get my fiancée to read books, at a point she told me she’ll not read anything if I sustain my pressure on her the way I was doing it. I saw her point, quickly apologized, and promised to discuss ways to get her to respond.

ii. “So strong is our need to protect our autonomy, that if we see that someone has this single-mindedness of purpose, if they are acting like they think that they know what’s best for us and are not leaving it to us to make the choice of how we behave, it stimulates our resistance.”

This is important to me because it brings to my awareness what drives human beings. I discover I also resist it when people try to prevent me from exercising my autonomy, so I learn from that in my dealings with other human beings.

iii. “Punishment never works.”

I like its brevity and simplicity. It’s easy to remember whenever I want to employ punitive measures.

iv. “Reward is just as coercive as punishment. In both cases we are using power over people, controlling the environment in a way that tries to force people to behave in ways that we like.”

This quote is important to me because it’s a break from the norm. Besides, it’s based on a fundamental principle. It teaches me that reward for certain behaviours is manipulative.

v. “All human beings, when they are in pain, need presence and empathy. They may want advice, but they want that after they’ve received the empathic connection.”

This is important to me because it’s helped me catch myself several times when I offer advice and correction first before empathizing. Oftentimes, people shut down and don’t feel free to open up to me anymore.

vi. “Whenever people hear a demand, it’s hard for them to keep focus on the value of whatever is being requested, because it threatens their autonomy. They want to be able to do something when they choose to do it, and not because they are forced to do it.”

Powerful! It’s important to me because I want people to focus on the value of doing things for me and not learn something else — something negative.

vii. “People receive requests as demands if they think they will be punished or blamed if they don’t do the task. When people have that idea, it takes all the joy out of doing anything.”

True talk. This is important to me because it helps me distinguish between when I’m making request and when I’m making demand.

viii. “When people hear demands, it looks to them as though our caring and respect and love are conditional. It looks as though we are only going to care for them as people when they do what we want.”

Wow! Again, this is important to me because it logically provides reasons why I shouldn’t make demands. It’s going to help me communicate compassionately.

ix. “If we don’t take other people’s needs into consideration, our own needs can never really be met.”

Another fundamental fact that’s really going to help me in my interpersonal relationships.

x. “In the protective use of force, our intent is not to control the child; it’s to control the environment.”

This quote is important to me because it helps to know what I’m really doing when I decide to use protective force and it’s going to help me answer those who are against compassionate communication.

xi. “If we’re going to be brutal with ourselves when we’re not perfect parents, our children are going to suffer.”

This quote is important to me because most of the time I make a mountain out of a mole hill when I make mistakes as a guardian and as a communicator. Now, I’ll take it easy with myself.

xii. “Hell is having children and thinking there’s such a thing as a good parent.”

This quote is important to me because it helps me to drop unrealistic expectations as far as parenting is concerned and also helping other parents to do so.

xiii. “We can only really give in a loving way to the degree that we are receiving similar love and understanding.”

This quote is important to me because it awakens me to the responsibility I owe to myself to give myself attention and receive love and understanding when other people offer them to me.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

The book didn’t contain any exercise.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Ratings:

A. How interesting was it to read? 9
B. How helpful were the contents? 10
C. How easy was it to understand? 10
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 8

Difficult Conversations Assessment

Assessment By Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that when people communicate or fail to communicate there are underlying issues like feelings, identity, and who’s right that people usually do not talk about which usually boomerangs to undermine the relationship.

i. That in difficult conversations, I should move from certainty to curiosity. Instead of asking myself, “How can they think that?!” I should ask myself, “I wonder what information they have that I don’t?”

This idea is important to me because it’s going to help eliminate a practice I usually do that’s been undermining my relationships. When people say or do things that hurt me, I usually respond by saying “how can they think that?!” For instance, a friend of mine said something about my health that I interpreted as a discouragement and sternly questioned why she had to say something like that when I’m doing all I can and making little progress. She “shutdown” and said nothing more.

I became aware of the mistake I made and apologized promptly and shared with her the information I had (that she did not have) and how strongly I felt about the issue. That helped us to return to the communication path.

ii. That I should not assume they (the people I communicate with) meant to hurt me: disentangle intent from impact.

This idea is important to me because, again, I realized I’ve been making the mistake of assuming, to my own detriment, that people meant to hurt me, when in fact, I wasn’t certain. A good case in point was when I was having a difficult conversation with my fiancée. I excused myself for some minutes to answer a phone call, and on returning, I couldn’t find her but found a note she left for me about why she couldn’t continue with the conversation anymore.

I was angry and felt all sort of negative emotion and was hurt. I went out of my way to do something I shouldn’t have done because I concluded she meant to hurt me. But I was shocked and ashamed when I discovered that she left for my own good.

iii. That I should abandon blame: map the contribution system.

This idea is important to me because I used to take sole blame and responsibility when things go wrong in my relationships that I’m directly responsible for. This idea takes it a little further in a powerful way – that I should not just abandon blame, I should ask how we both contributed to the problem and how to prevent it from happening again in the future.

An instance was when I delegated someone to lead a team to a conference and things went awry in a way that undermined my leadership. I didn’t ask for contribution and ways to prevent it from happening again, I only took responsibility. And it happened again! Now, I know better.

iv. That I should acknowledge my feelings and deal with it

I rarely acknowledge my feelings and it usually burst out in ugly ways during the conversation. Because I’ve been scripted by my culture that it’s unmanly to show emotion. For instance, recently, the leadership of the Church I attend took a decision that flew in the face of the values I stand for. I was angry and totally unhappy, and I let them know promptly. If it was before, I’d have stomached it and pull out of the plan we were working on together. And that would have destroyed a lot of things. But by expressing my feelings and encouraging them to express theirs and sharing my own story and encouraging them to share theirs, we were able to connect empathically and reached an understanding. It’s an experience none of us will ever forget.

v. That to begin a difficult conversation, I should start from the “Third Story.”

The authors define the Third Story as the story a keen observer would tell, someone with no stake in my particular problem.

This idea is important to me because it provides me with a kind of step-by-step guide to starting a difficult conversation which is always the most difficult part. For instance, I had a problem with one of the youths in the church because she did something morally wrong and refused to see it as such. This built up a wall between her and me and even extended to her fiancé (who is new to the church that I’m supposed to welcome and show some love).

Well, she wanted the situation to change for better but she hadn’t the balls to raise the issue with me, instead she told other people about it. I took the lead but didn’t know how to begin. This idea helped me out. I started from the Third Story, told her my story and encouraged her to tell me hers as it makes sense to her. At a point in the conversation she was pleasantly shocked and at the end of the conversation she said I was a good man and we shook hands as old friends.

vi. That I should take the lead in problem solving

When I have problems in my relationships, I usually wait on the other people to raise the issue and take the lead in resolving it. Because in some cases, they are older than me and in some other cases, the issue is affecting them more than me. But they usually don’t take the lead and the problem festers.

Whenever I remember this nudging from the authors to take the lead if I really want to improve the quality of my relationships, I go out of my way to take the lead and the result is always gratifying. And example is the experience I just shared above.

vii. That I should sort out the Three Conversations

In the book, the authors isolated the three areas that are always the basis of difficult conversations: The “What happened?” conversation, the feelings conversation, and the identity conversation.

This idea has helped me to personally resolve issues within me and to share it with others and it often lead to amicable resolutions. For instance, the issue I had with the Church was a feelings and identity issue. By recognizing that, I’m able to ask myself and the other person the right questions that always lead to solution.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas will help me to be reflect on the underlying issues in my difficult conversations, to listen to other people’s story as it make sense to them and to have the courage to share my own story as it makes sense to me. These ideas will help me to stay open, to agree to disagree without being disagreeable, and to be humble enough to look for how we’ve both contributed to the problem at hand and how we can prevent it from happening again. These way, unnecessary quarrels, riots, and wars will be avoided and way will be given to peace – an important element in an ideal world.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “Conflict and differing perspectives, handled well and effectively, should become a competitive asset – an engine for rapid learning and innovation.”

This quote is important to me because it gives me the confidence that my communication skills (difficult conversation skills) could be a competitive advantage.

ii. “There is no such thing as a diplomatic hand grenade. Delivering a difficult message is like throwing a hand grenade. Coated with sugar, thrown hard or soft, a hand grenade is still going to do damage.”

This quote is going to help me to take my time to communicate in a compassionate way and not “sugar-coat” words I know will hurt people no matter how I say it.

iii. “Despite what appear to be infinite variations, all difficult conversations share a common structure.”

I love this because I like to know the structures of things so that I can know how and where to approach them.

iv. “Difficult conversations are almost never about getting the facts right. They are about conflicting perceptions, interpretations and values.”

This quote is going to help me to redefine the problems I’m dealing with.

v. “The quest to determine who is right and who is wrong is a dead end.”

This reminds me to shift my attention to problem solving and not insist on establishing who’s right and who’s wrong.

vi. “What I think about your intentions will affect how I think about you and, ultimately, how our conversation goes. The error we make in the realm of intentions is simple but profound: we assume we know the intentions of others when we don’t. Worse still, when we are unsure about someone’s intentions, we too often decide they are bad.”

I found it to be true and it helps me to be aware of this error in my relationships.

vii. “In situations that give rise to difficult conversations, it is almost always true that what happened is the result of things both people did or failed to do. And punishment is rarely relevant or appropriate when competent, sensible people do something stupid, the smartest move is to try to figure out, first, what kept them from seeing it from coming and, second, how to prevent the problem from happening again.”

This quote added two further important steps to take when things go wrong for me.

viii. “Telling someone to change makes it less rather than more likely that they will. This is because people almost never change without first feeling understood.”

I found this to be true and this quote is especially important because it gives me a better way of influencing people to change – listening to understand them.

ix. “To get anywhere in a disagreement, we need to understand the other person’s story well enough to see how their conclusions make sense within it. And we need to help them understand the story in which our conclusions make sense.”

This is a powerful quote because it helps me to shed my belief that it is only my own story that makes sense and this has helped me a lot in making headway in the difficult conversations I’ve had.

x. “The past gives meaning to the present.”

This quote helps me to know what to evaluate about the meaning that people give to situations. This way, we can both challenge the past to find an empowering frame to reframe situations to our advantage.

xi. “Our past experiences often develop into “rules” by which we live our lives. Whether we are aware of them or not, we all follow such rules.”

It helps me to be aware of how I form the limiting “rules” I’ve unconsciously developed so I can challenge and replace them with empowering “rules.”

xii. “It is useful to attempt to clarify your intentions. The question is when. If you do it at the beginning of the conversation, you’re likely doing it without fully understanding what the other person really means to express.”

This quote helps me to know where not to clarify people’s intentions.

xiii. “When we find ourselves being accused of bad intentions – we have a strong tendency to want to defend ourselves. ‘That is not what I intended.’ We are defending our intentions and character. However, starting here leads to trouble.”’

It’s going to help me not to accuse people of bad intentions.

xiv. “Feelings are too powerful to remain peacefully bottled. Thy will be heard one way or another, whether in leaks or bursts. And if handled indirectly or without honesty, they contaminate communication.”

It encourages me to express my feelings upfront instead of “bottling” it and I’ve discovered it helps a lot.

xv. “Our anxiety results not just from having to face the other person but from having to face ourselves.”

I discovered this to be true. Some of the difficult conversations I’ve had are about how I see myself, having to face the truth about myself. This awareness has helped me to see that most of the problems I’ve with other people stem from how I see myself as a result of their actions.

xvi. “We have a deep desire to feel heard, and to know that others care enough to listen.”

This really moves me to learn to listen more than I talk.

xvii. “How often do you change your values and beliefs – or whom you love or what you want in life – based on something someone tells you? And how likely are you to do so when the person who is trying to change you doesn’t seem fully aware of the reasons you see things differently in the first place?”

Wow! It helps me to step into other people’s shoes and really see how their minds work. This is a really good explanation of the Golden Rule.

xviii. “People are more likely to change if they think we understand them and if they feel heard and respected. They are more likely to change if they feel free not to.”

Another powerful observation that’s really going to help me to bring about changes that are almost guaranteed instead of using conventional means like coercion.

xix. “As an empathetic listener, you are on a journey with a direction but no destination. You will never “arrive.” You will never be able to say, “I truly understand you.” We are all too complex for that, and our skills to imagine ourselves into other people’s lives too limited. But in a sense this is good news. Psychologists have found that we are each more interested in knowing that the other person is trying to empathize with us – that they are willing to struggle to understand how we feel and see how we see – than we are in believing that they have actually accomplished the goal… struggling to understand communicates the most positive message of all.”

This quote helps me to understand that I cannot fully understand people and how they feel but at least I now know that my effort to do just that works just as much.

xxxi. “In a difficult conversation your primary task is not to persuade, impress, trick, outwit, convert, or win over the other person. It is to express what you see and why you see it that way, how you feel, and maybe who you are.”

This simplifies everything for me and what purpose I need to have as I enter into difficult conversations.

xxxii. “You can reframe anything.”

This quote fires me up to find empowering frames for any situation.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Ratings:

John Maxwell’s Three Books in One Volume

Assessment By Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that to succeed as a leader and make a positive influence in your world, you need to have the right attitude, be a person of influence, and develop leaders around you who’ll develop other leaders.

i. That I should find, recruit, and train other leaders to assist me in my leadership responsibilities.

This idea is important to me because I’ve never planned to find and train other leaders to assist me in my leadership responsibilities – I mean, an organized system for doing that. I was busy managing instead of leading.

Now, I’ve made a name list, created a folder for this purpose, and have started designing training programs. And in the new year, when I return from vacation, I’ll inform them and see how I can attract other potential leaders and deliberately train them.

ii. That I should develop an annual, written-down plan for my personal growth.

This is a great idea to me because it enabled me to sit down and think about my personal growth. As a result I’ve come up with a “killer” plan for my personal growth for the year 2012. My plan includes sharpening my communication skills, coaching, leadership, and business skills. And I’ve also created a dynamic lifetime personal development plan.

iii. That I should first create a climate for potential leaders to flourish.

As I am made to understand: flowers don’t grow and flourish in a stony garden. So, this idea gives me the reason why I need to improve the environment I currently operate in to make it conducive for growth. I’ve not really been able to come up with how to create a nurturing climate, but this idea surely gets me thinking. With time and more research and meditation, I’ll surely come off with enough ideas.

iv. That I should hire people who are more intelligent than I am.

This idea is an eye-opener. I discovered that naturally, I’ll want to hire people who are like me or worse, less intelligent than I am. In the first place, this calls for my own personal development and tells me what I need to be aware of when recruiting.

Recently, I taught a congregation who wants to hire an evangelist and brought to their awareness the tendency to hire people who are less intelligent than they are. They saw my point and are making changes to their interview questions.

v. That I should choose a leadership model for myself.

This idea is important to me because it enabled me to come up with names of leadership models. And by so doing, I suddenly have the vision of the kind of leader I want to become, the kind of legacy I want to leave behind, and to think big. For instance, one of the leadership models I chose thought big enough to acquire an estate for a resort and training center, I’m also dreaming and planning of acquiring an estate and building a training school.

vi. That for one week I should treat every person I meet, without exception, as the most important person on earth.

The author said for one week, but I’ve vowed to do this for the rest of my life because of the positive results I’ve seen practicing this. For instance, I attended a youth end-of-the-year program and almost unconsciously treated every person I met as the most important person on earth – both great and small. I congratulated those who sang well and those who didn’t – I sincerely told them how much I enjoyed their voices and the messages they minister. During the process, people I didn’t know before then opened up to me. I was able to relieve some people of their migraines and put smiles on their faces. In short, they were pleasantly shocked because they rarely got treated the way I treated them.

vii. That I should list the problems I’m presently facing in life and write beside the problems my present reaction to them, then challenge myself to discover at least three possible benefits from each problem, then look for ways to get the problems solved.

This idea is so important to me because it’s practical and it’s something I could do right away. So, I sat down and listed the three problems I was facing then (I resolve to continue doing this, though). One of the problems I was facing was a software I bought, which is the key component of a new business I want to go start. For weeks I got nothing but poor treatment from the vendors. I was very angry.

So, I sat down and did the above suggestions. I discovered that my reaction to it won’t lead me anywhere near what I really want. I also came up with possible benefits which I focused on, then came up with three ways to get the problems solved. As I write this, I don’t feel any bit of anger anymore but excitement as a result of the solution I came up with.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas will help me to look at the positive side of things, to “light the candle instead of cursing the darkness.” In my daily personal life, it’s going to help me treat everyone I meet as the most important person, and for me to commit to a daily personal development. And by providing great and exemplary leadership and training other leaders to develop other leaders, the resulting effect will affect the world in a great and positive way.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “The Stanford Research Institute says that the money you make in any endeavor is determined 12.5 percent by knowledge and 87.5% by your ability to deal with people.”

This quote gives me another compelling reason to invest more in learning how to relate with people.

ii. “When Goliath came up against the Israelites, the soldiers all thought, He’s so big we can never kill him. David looked at the same giant and thought; He’s so big I can’t miss him.”

It provides me with an empowering frame to look at problems in my own life.

iii. “Nothing is as hard as it looks; everything is more rewarding than you expect, and if anything can go right it will and at the best possible moment.”

I like this quote because it’s in response to the popular Murphy’s Law – “Nothing is as easy as it looks; everything takes longer than you expect; and if anything can go wrong, it will and at the worst possible moment.”

Now, I have a new, empowering way to look at situations instead of taking the grim outlook as if it’s the only way to look at things.

iv. “Eliminate these words completely: I can’t, if, I doubt, I don’t think, I don’t have the time, maybe, I’m afraid of, it’s impossible, (minimize) I. Make these words a part of your vocabulary: I can, I will, expect the best, I know, I will make the time, positively, I am confident, I do believe, (promote) You, God is able.”

Quotes with specific phrases such as this that I use in my daily communication with myself and others help me to catch myself saying them and replacing them with positive phrases instead.

v. “Acquiring and keeping people is a leader’s most important task.”

The word “most” helps me to take a serious look at the task of acquiring and keeping people.

vi. “Those closest to the leader will determine the success level of that leader.”

This quote made me to sit back and take a hard look at the people closest to me in the organizations I lead.

vii. “Grow a leader grow the organization. A company cannot grow until its leaders grow within.”

This quote has led me to commit to growing leaders. In fact, I intend to start a leadership academy.

viii. “Often, leaders wrongly believe that they must compete with the people close to them instead of working with them.”

This quote is important to me because I see it happen in the Church community I worship. I’ll surely bring this to their awareness.

ix. “Personal growth must be deliberate, planned, and consistent.”

It helps me to see that my personal development is not something I should trust to chance.

x. “There is no success without a successor.”

I come from a background whose leaders pay no attention to successors. So, this quote empowers me to re-script myself and start asking who’ll succeed me.

xi. “Right atmosphere allows potential leaders to bloom and grow. That is why the atmosphere needs to be valued and developed first.”

This quote enables me to get my priorities right; to develop the right atmosphere first.

xii. “Terminating a poor performer benefits the organization and everyone in it. It also gives the former employee the opportunity to reevaluate his potential and find the place and position where he or she can be a winner.”

It helps to frame firing employees in a way that the employee will see the benefit instead of seeing it as a setback.

xiii. “One of the best things you can do the people you’re developing, besides modeling personal growth yourself, is to help them develop their own personal plans for growth.”

I never thought about this. I’m just imagining the great impact this is going to have on the people I’m developing by the time I’ve help them develop a personal development plan.

xiv. “Great leaders share themselves and what they have learned.”

This quote reinforces what I have been doing and to do it even more.

xv. “Leaders tend to hire people whose ability and expertise are beneath their own. As a result, when organizations grow and more people are hired, the number of people with low expertise far exceeds the leaders who have great expertise.”

This quote is important to me because it made me to be aware of a very important tendency that I need to do something about. This revelation alone is priceless.

xvi. “Anyone can see people as they are. It takes a leader to see what they can become, encourage them to grow in that direction, and believe that they will do it.”

This quote empowers me to look at people’s potential instead of seeing them as they are. I’ve been guilty of seeing people as they are. Now, I know better.

xvii. “Too many people expect their people to encourage themselves. But most people require outside encouragement to propel them forward.”

I’ve always thought it is best to empower people to encourage themselves. But I discovered that even though I can encourage myself, I still expect other people to encourage me. Then this quote reinforced it that other people need what I need too. So, I’ve started encouraging them.

xviii. “The growth and development of people is the highest calling of leadership.”

This quote enables me to tweak my vision to include developing people and to ensure every action I take is towards that end.

xix. “We should not try to rely solely on ourselves as a result of delegation failure, nor should we blame the people to whom we have given the task. Rarely is delegation failure the subordinate’s fault. Maybe you picked the wrong person for the job, didn’t train; develop or motivate sufficiently.”

This quote helps me to lift the responsibility of failure in my delegation drive off the shoulders of my delegate and place it squarely on my shoulders. This way I’m able to evaluate the failure and take steps to ensure my delegate succeeds next time out.

xx. “Center for Creative Research discovered that though many errors and obstacles can be overcome by a person who wants to rise to the top of an organization, that person is almost never able to move up in the organization if he compromises his integrity by betraying a trust.”

It helps me to place a strong emphasis on integrity and not to betray a trust.

xxi. “Many succeed momentarily by what they know; some succeed temporarily by what they do; but few succeed permanently by what they are.”

It helps me to stoke my drive to develop myself personally.

xxii. “Integrity begins with a specific, conscious decision. If you wait until a moment of crisis before settling your integrity issues, you set yourself up to fail. Choose today to live by a strict moral code, and determine to stick with it no matter what happens.”

This quote moved me to sit down and envision how I’ll respond in many difficult situations.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

Yes.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Ratings:

Perfect Health

Assessment By Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that there is a place in every person called perfect health that is free from disease, never feels pain, that cannot age or die and we can all reach that place if we live in tune with the intelligent, never-changing nature.

i. That I should know my prakruti (body type) as the first step towards perfect health.

This idea is important to me because it helps me to identify what’s good for my body and what is not. For instance, I embarked on a local herbs treatment of an infection I was suffering from. In order to extract the components of the herbs the doctor soaked them in alcohol. I drank five 75cl bottles of it and I almost lost my life! It threw me off balance, purged me, and almost incapacitated me.

Though it was destroying the infection, it was destroying me as well. As I learned in the book, other body types can handle alcohol but for my body type, alcohol is strictly forbidden because it usually throws my body types out of balance.

ii. That I should respect, listen, and obey my body type

This idea is important to me it is shows up as the answer to my health problems. For instance, if I’m working, it will get to a time my body will say I need rest and food, but I’ll disobey it and continue working anyway. The result is the sick body I’m left with. Now I know better to listen to my body and obey it. Now, if I’m working, and I feel sleepy, I just drop it and go get some sleep no matter the urgency of the deadline I want to meet or how inspired I am.

iii. That I should balance my dominant body type (Pitta) by moderation, coolness, attention to leisure, exposure to natural beauty, balance of rest and activity, and decreased stimulants.

This idea is important to me because the seven things mentioned above (moderation, coolness, attention to leisure, exposure to natural beauty, balance of rest and activity, and decreased stimulants) are what I used to put together a health recovery plan for myself to be implemented daily.

I really needed this because usually at the end of each year, I go on vacation in order to plan for the next year. This idea helps me cut the meditation curve and saved me high-value time.

iv. That I should meditate at least for 20 minutes twice a day as a way of life.

This idea is important to me because I’ve been hearing about meditation, meditation, meditation. But the way the author really painted the power and effectiveness of meditation got me hooked. I’ve been trying my best to meditate; though, I’m still learning.

And of the few times I’ve done it, I noticed remarkable changes in my appetite, thinking, and health generally. I’ve since included it as part of my full health recovery plan.

v. That I should make it a point to spend time in nature and listen to the healing sounds that surround me

This idea is important to me enough to include it as part of my perfect health plan. This idea helped me to discover that the environment I spend most of my time is not health supporting. This same idea contributed to my plan to take a break at a place close to the beach so I can commune with nature.

vi. That I should ride nature’s waves and not fight against them

What the author means by riding nature’s waves is fitting into nature’s rhythm – the hundreds of things that are beautifully and intelligently arranged by nature – for instance sleeping at night and working during the day and not the other way round.

How this is important to me is that, I’ve reordered what I do within the 24 hours the day has to offer in order to fit perfectly into nature’s rhythm: rising (6 – 8 a.m.), lunch (noon – 1 p.m.), dinner (6 -7 p.m.), bedtime (9:30 – 10:30 p.m.). With these, I know when to rise, when to eat my breakfast, lunch, dinner and when to sleep. And once it’s time, it’s time. This has really helped me to be organized and effective.

vii. That I should exercise but not to my full ability

The author busted the myth of “no pain, no gain” as it pertains to physical exercise. This idea is very important to me because I remember countless times when I do exercise either by playing football or jogging very long distances, I fell seriously sick the next day and it usually takes about two weeks for me to fully recover. It makes no sense, yet I kept reading from so-called experts that I have to exercise to my full ability to get the full benefit of exercising.

So, this idea has sort of set me free and I’m seeing the benefits already. Once I start getting tired of exercising, I stop. It makes sense because the whole point of exercising is for me to be fit and not to get sick.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas will help me to pay complete attention to my body, to eat when I’m hungry, drink clean water when I’m thirsty, sleep when I feel sleepy, and exercise my body daily. By so doing, I’ll be at my best, improve my physical appearance, and hit perfect health. Based on my results, I’ll share my story with others and educate and empower them to do same to attain perfect health because a better world is composed of people with perfect health.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “Everyday we come in contact with millions of viruses, bacteria, allergens, and fungi, and only the tiniest fraction of these encounters ever leads to disease. It is not uncommon for doctors to see patients whose respiratory tracts contain clusters of virulent meningococcus bacteria living there harmlessly. Only on rare occasions do they break out and cause meningitis…many of us carry the varicella virus, lying dormant in our nerves since a bout with chicken pox as children, but only rarely, under stress, does it reactivate to cause the painful condition of shingles. What provokes such attack? No one knows precisely, but it seems to involve a mysterious factor called “host resistance,” meaning that we, the host of germs, somehow open or close the window to them. More than 99.9 percent of the time, the window is closed, which implies that each of us is much closer to perfect health than we realize.”

Wow! This quote is important to me because it shifted my focus from the conventional focus on germs to focusing on boosting my immunity. And it increased my confidence that I can attain perfect health.

ii. “In addition to our body’s physical immunity, we all have strong emotional resistance to sickness.”

The keyword I noted there is emotion. So, the quote helps me to pay attention to my emotions.

iii. “People who consider themselves “too busy to get sick” are known to have above-average health, while those who worry excessively about disease fall prey to it more often.”

This quote is important to me because I’m managing a health situation which the medical community maintains is incurable. So, I used to get obsessively worried. I found this quote to be true for me because at a time I got too busy not thinking about it and my health is better for it today.

iv. “The first secret you should know about perfect health is that you have to choose it. You can only be as healthy as you think it is possible to be. It involves a total shift in perspective that makes disease and infirm old age unacceptable.”

I was doing a research recently about my health condition and all I was seeing was doom and gloom. I remembered this quote and rejected the medical experts’ stance and consciously chose to be healthy, to heal any illness in me.

v. “The mind exerts the deepest influence on the body, and freedom from sickness depends upon contacting our own awareness, bringing it into balance, and then extending that balance to the body. This state of balanced awareness, more than any kind of physical immunity, creates a higher state of health.”

This quote helps me to see that the journey from poor health to perfect health is an internal journey, that it is a mind game and to pay more attention to my awareness.

vi. “What we build in our bodies we can also unbuild.”

This quote empowers me to confront my health challenges head on.

vii. “The secret of life at the quantum level is that anything in your body can be changed with the flick of an intention.”

This quote is important to me because it’s helped me to send signals to my quantum body that I intend to heal any infection in my body. And I believe that by piling pressure on it, someday, my quantum body will let me have my way.

viii. “The flow of oxygen, carbon, hydrogen, and nitrogen is so rapid that you could be renewed in a matter of weeks; it is only the heavier atoms of iron, magnesium, copper and so on that slow the process.”

When I read this quote, the rhetorical question that shot through my head was, “So my body can improve in a matter of weeks?” This quote is important to me because I’m desperate to improve my physical appearance within the shortest amount of time possible.

ix. “You body knows what is good and bad for it; nature has built the correct instincts into you from birth. Once you begin to notice and obey these innate tendencies, you will find that your physiology is capable of achieving balance on its own, with minimal effort on your part.”

This quote is important to me because I really didn’t like to work hard to achieve perfect health. So, with this quote that only a minimal effort is needed on my own part, I’m happy and hopeful.

x. “Everything you eat, say, think, do, see, and feel affects your overall state of balance.”

It raised my awareness on what I eat, say, think, do, see, and feel. I’m now more careful about what I eat, see, feel, think, and say.

xi. “Before a cancer can exist physically, it must be triggered at a deeper level.”

I like the logic behind this quote. It enables me to think that any sickness in my body was triggered at the quantum level and I can eliminate it at the quantum level.

xii. “Illness results from distortions in the patterns of quantum vibrations that hold the body intact. You can learn to take your awareness to that level of yourself – in fact, what we call thoughts and emotions are just expressions of these quantum fluctuations. Awareness has the capacity to heal, and it seems to be instrumental in causing sudden cures even in the most advanced cases of incurable disease.”

This quote provides another faith-building block to my intention to heal the illnesses in my body and increase my immunity.

xiii. “At the early age (10s – 20s) when incipient disease is easiest to treat and prevent, symptoms are often difficult to read.”

Though I was a little scared when I read this, it actually helped me to be careful about what I do with my body now and to warn others also.

xiv. “Every body type contains a wide range of possibilities. Unfortunately, we all have a tendency to compare ourselves to a norm, which generate feelings of inadequacy when we cannot live up to the standards we feel everyone must meet. Such conformity is not in natures’ plan.”

This quote is important to me because I have a friend who is obsessive about having a slim body but her body type is the exact opposite of the slim type. Regardless of what she does, she’ll never get there. I brought this quote to her awareness and I thank God she’s adjusted her thinking.

xv. “In Ayurveda, we don’t talk much about germs, which are basically well understood in the West already. What is poorly understood are “host defenses.”

It helps me to shift my attention from germs to my defenses. It makes sense to me because I can do something to my defenses but have little control over germs that are flying all over the place.

xvi. “Ayurveda doesn’t dictate that one food is “right” and another “wrong.” Instead, you discover right and wrong by listening to your body types.”

This quote helps bring sanity to the volume of literatures I’ve read on nutrition. Heck, the so-called nutrition experts don’t even agree on the same thing. As a result, I didn’t know who to believe and I was confused as the right step to take. Now, I know better to allow the instincts in my body to dictate which food is good for me and which is bad.

xvii. “The real medicine our bodies need is medicine for our awareness.”

Real talk! Before now, there were times when I became aware of certain realities, and as a result, sicknesses suddenly disappeared from my body till date. I intend to do just that to the remaining stubborn illnesses in my body.

xviii. “Your sadness is relayed chemically to each cell, causing a feeling of heartache, for example, and your immune system to grow weaker.”

It reminds me to quickly shift to gratitude when I’m sad because sadness weakens my immune system.

xix. “Ayurveda encourages a natural setting, preferably a beautiful one, for recuperation. The five senses are constantly feeding signals to your quantum mechanical body, and each signal gets metabolized by you, entering your storehouse of sights, sounds, smells, and so on. If what the senses see, hear, touch, and smell reminds you of sickness, then something unhealthy is getting absorbed. How can you renew your reality if you are always subtly reminding yourself of the old one?”

This quote helps me to set my goals higher (by choosing to acquire an apartment with a natural setting) and to be careful about the environment I choose to spend time in.

xx. “Physical impurities in cells have their equivalents in the mind: fear, anger, greed, compulsiveness, doubt, and other negative emotions. Operating at the quantum level, they can be as damaging to us as any chemical toxin.”

Hmmn… this quote is important to me because it helps me to realize the damage that negative emotions have on my health and to ensure I don’t permit them in my mind.

xxi. “Focusing your attention on an area in your body that needs healing and introducing an intention is a powerful therapeutic technique.”

I like this quote because this principle doesn’t cost anything economically. It’s something I can do anytime I choose to.

xxii. “Find music that resonates with your nature. Find the vibrations that are most nourishing to you and tune in to the effects the sounds have on your physiology. If you feel pleasantly refreshed, light, and alert, the music is working.”

Even though I have read books that recommended good music being good to the body I didn’t do anything about. This quotes kind of serve like an icing on the cake. And I’ve since included it as part of my full recovery plan.

xxiii. “All things being equal, regular habits are correlated with long life; these include eating three meals a day, getting eight hours of sleep each night, going to bed on time, and so on. Also, being married is indicative of a longer life expectancy than being single.”

This quote is important to me because before now I unconsciously skip meals, slept less, and work hard. Unknown to me I was unconsciously choosing sickness. I especially like the marriage part – another reason to hasten to get married.

xxiv. “For the most part, western nutrition comes out of laboratory analysis. Ayurvedic nutrition comes directly from nature. When your taste buds greet a bite of food, an enormous amount of useful information is delivered to the doshas. Working solely with this information, Ayurveda allows us to eat a balanced diet naturally, guided by our own instincts, without turning nutrition into an intellectual headache.”

This quote also helps bring sanity to the ever evolving and confusing dieting industry. Which food should I eat? Which should I not touch? Now I know what to do.

xxv. “For the sake of economy and convenience, many cooks like to save leftovers, but Ayurveda frowns on this practice. Food is meant to be eaten fresh, right off the stove if not right out of the garden – the fresher the produce, the more the ojas. Old, cold food, even when reheated, will not produce ojas in the same amounts. Frozen food in general is also good to avoid.”

This powerful quote opened my eyes to an important fact and inspired me to do the right thing about the food I eat. Now, I only eat food off the stove and not food that’s been kept and reheated for days.

xxvi. “The best possible foods for the body are fruits, vegetable, and dairy products raised in your area – foods that thrived on the same air, water, nutrients, and sunlight that you grow on.”

This quote makes things easy for me, in that I can readily get good foods grown in my area and more so, they are beneficial than imported foods.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

Yes.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Ratings:

A. How interesting was it to read? 9
B. How helpful were the contents? 10
C. How easy was it to understand? 9
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 10

The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People

Assessment By Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that effectiveness is the balance between production and production capacity; and for us to produce on a regularly basis we need to take care of ourselves and the people that produce and our character is the foundation.

i. That I should begin with the end in mind by developing a personal mission statement based on my roles and principles

This idea is important to me because I’ve been struggling to come up with a personal mission statement that really captures the essence of what I stand for. But by first defining my roles in life, a balanced mission is flowing from those roles. Since it’s a process, I’m taking my time to compose it. Some of the roles I came up with are: Son, role model, spiritual leader, change agent, educator.

And from my role as a Role Model I was able to come up with this mission: To live by a strict moral code and stick with it no matter what happens.”

ii. That I should identify an experience I might encounter in the near future where, based on past experience, I would probably behave reactively. Then review the situation in the context of my Circle of Influence and take several moments and create the experience vividly in my mind, picture myself responding in a proactive manner.

This idea is important to me because I really sat back, closed my eyes, and imagine difficult situations and how I’ll respond. For instance, I imagine an elder in the church telling me I’ve not developed the skin to take insults from people and me telling him that no, I’ve developed the skin for insults. Then I visualized him raining all sort of verbal abuse on me in a way that I’m dazed. I visualized myself remaining calm and seeing it as a test to overcome.

iii. That I should plan my week every Sunday based on a time management paradigm that flows from my mission statement, roles in life, and long-term goals.

This idea is a life-changer. This practice has become a ritual of some sort for me. I now sit every Sunday evening and visualize the entire week and what I’ll accomplish and how I’ll feel. I’m now balanced and purposeful. My happiness has climbed to new heights.

I no longer subordinate other important areas in my life to situations of the moment. Every night, I look at my list and make a list of to-do’s for the next day based on what I wrote down on Sunday. Surprisingly, I’m now effective without sacrificing my health and relationships.

iv. That I should start now to make deposits into the Emotional Bank Accounts of my important relationships

This idea is important to me because I’ve not been making deposits into the Emotional Bank Accounts of my important relationships as much as I want to. As a result, it hit back at me. This idea has helped me to plan it. For instance, my little sister, without the knowledge of anyone in the family, got enmeshed in a relationship that put the family reputation on the line. While others reacted and shouted heaven and earth, I asked the questions that made me aware that we have not been making deposit into her Emotional Bank account enough for her to have opened up when it all started.

I made a dramatic turnaround and scheduled many time outs alone with her to start making the deposits. It made the needed difference that we all craved for.

v. That I should listen with the intent to understand

This idea is important to me because I’ve been listening with the intent to reply. As a result, I don’t really understand the other person and this weakens my power to influence.

Now, when I listen, I focus all my attention to understand and not to reply unless the person asks me for advice. For instance, a friend of mine started work in a new place and he called me to tell me that the workplace was boring. Immediately, it came to my mind to tell him to make it lively. But I remembered this idea and asked myself whether I really understood him. So, I hold off my advice and tried to understand him and I discovered he felt better off than if I’d given him that piece of advice.

vi. That I select a specific relationship where I would like to develop a Win-Win Agreement. Try to put myself in the other person’s place, and write down explicitly how I think that person sees the solution. Then list, from my own perspective, what results would constitute a win for me. Then approach the other person and ask if he or she would be willing to communicate until we reach a point of agreement and mutually beneficial solution.

This idea is important to me because it enabled me to bring a new relationship I want to form into focus. I have a business proposal for a big firm in the country which I intend to provide a writing service for their customers in exchange for a fixed percentage of payments. And based on this idea, I came up with a list of WINS for them. I intend presenting the proposal next year (2012), so I can’t talk about the result now.

Just as important is the part of the idea that says I should ask the person whether if he or she would be willing to communicate until we reach a point of agreement and mutually beneficial solution.

vii. That I should renew the four dimensions of my nature – physical, spiritual, mental, and social/emotional

This quote is important to me because when talking of renewal, I always look at only one aspect – physical. And that’s by exercising. But this idea opened my eyes to the need for a balanced renewal. And I love how the author broke it down to the specifics: Physical (exercise, nutrition, stress management), Mental (reading, visualizing, planning, writing), Social/Emotional (service, empathy, synergy, intrinsic security), Spiritual (value clarification and commitment, study and meditation).

In one instance, to renew my mental dimension, I’ve started writing a daily devotional. And I’m improving my mental capacity by the day.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas will help me to pay attention to my capacity to produce twenty years down the line and not to sacrifice my health for short term gains. For instance, when my body needs rest and renewal, I’ll obey it. More importantly, these ideas are going to help me strike a balance among the four dimensions of life and not subordinate important areas of my life to other equally important areas. And by thinking win/win and seeking to understand first, I’ll help create a better world where we all are interdependent.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “If you want to achieve your highest aspirations and overcome your greatest challenges, identify and apply the principle or natural law that governs the result you seek.”

This is important to me because it’s enabled me to think in terms of natural laws in the problems I’m presently facing.

ii. “The need to produce today is today’s reality and represents the demands of capital, but the real mantra of success is sustainability and growth. You may be able to meet your quarterly numbers, but the real question is, are you making the necessary investment that will sustain and increase that success one, five, and ten years from now?”

It shifts my focus from just “production” to “sustainable production.”

iii. “The problem is that our modern culture says, “go in earlier, stay later, be more efficient, live with the sacrifice for now – but the truth is that balance and peace of mind are not produced by these; they follow the person who develops a clear sense of his or her highest priorities and who lives with focus and integrity toward them.”

This quote is important to me because it suddenly brought three very important things to my focus to form my theme for year 2012 and beyond: PRIORITIES, FOCUS, and INTEGRITY.

iv. “The greatest opportunities and boundless accomplishments of the Knowledge Worker Age are reserved for those who master the art of “we””.

Though I’ve done many things that leveraged the “principle of we”, but it’s really been a long time. This quote serves as a reminder to the core values I stand for.

v. “The way we see the problem is the problem.”

This forces me to have a rethink on the things I see as problems.

vi. “Interdependence is a far more mature, more advanced concept. If I am physically interdependent, I am self-reliant and capable, but I also realize that you and I working together can accomplish far more than, even at my best, I could accomplish alone.”

This quote serves as yet another reminder and reinforcement in my belief of the power of two and the powerlessness of an individual against a team.

vii. “Self-growth is tender; it’s holy ground. There’s no greater investment.”

Another inspiration for me to invest heavily in personal development.

viii. “A good exercise program is one that you can do in your own home and one that will build your body in three areas: endurance, flexibility, and strength.”

This is one of the most important things I learned from this book. Often times, when I wake up in the morning and know I should exercise but I will think of all the stress the road I’ll jog in presents, I’ll be discouraged. But this quote has helped me to exercise twice a day at home.

ix. “Look at the weaknesses of others with compassion, not accusation.”

At times, after reading books such as this, I want other people who haven’t read the book to practice what’s in the book with me. And when they don’t, I get angry and think that they supposed to know. Now, I see that as weakness, for not being fortunate to read the books I read. And I look upon that weakness with unreserved compassion.

x. “The metamorphosis taking place in most every industry and profession demands leadership first and management second.”

This quote is important to me because I’ve been doing it the other way round – management first, then leadership an afterthought – not deliberately, though. But now I know anything less than leadership first will result in ineffectiveness.

xi. “Efficient management without effective leadership is, as one individual phrased it, “like straightening deck chairs on the Titanic.”

I love the metaphor the author uses. It enables to picture the uselessness of great management without effective leadership.

xii. I suggest that in an interdependent situation, every P problem is a PC opportunity — a chance to build the Emotional Bank Accounts that significantly affect interdependent production.

This is the quote that helped me to view my little sister’s misbehavior differently. Where other people saw it as a problem, I saw it as a great opportunity to build the Emotional Bank Account.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

Yes.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No. And I want to strongly recommend that IIGL make this book a compulsory read in Level Two. It’s really going to help them come up with their life map in Level Three. I wished I read this book before Level Three.

Ratings:

Secrets of the Millionaire Mind

By Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that the root cause of financial struggle or financial abundance is our subconscious “financial blueprint” which is mainly shaped by our childhood experiences and until our “financial blueprint” is subconsciously “set” for success, nothing we learn, nothing we know, and nothing we do will help us to become rich.

i. That I should practice this money management system: create six accounts, then divide and deposit any money I receive into the six accounts in the following percentages: Financial Freedom Account: 10%. Play Account: 10%. Long-Term Savings for Spending Account: 10%. Education Account: 10%. Necessities Account: 50%. Give Account: 10%.

This idea is important to me because it helps me to manage by money holistically without feeling guilty or angry about the way I spend money. Also, it’s already helping me to be financially disciplined. For instance, I used to give almost all my income to my siblings to fund their education. And when I face financial challenges in my business, I get angry. Now, this money management system is going to help me strike a balance and derive joy from the way I manage my money.

ii. That I should do my best to find out what’s important to my partner in the area of money and what money really means to her.

This idea makes it dawn on me that the quarrels I have been having with my partner concerning money isn’t really about the money itself but about what money really means to her and to me. For me, money means seed, power, and freedom. But I don’t know what it means to her. So, we quarrel when she insist we spend money on something while I insist it must be part of our plan or we should plan about it first.

iii. That for the next seven days I should not complain at all. Not just out loud, but in my head as well.

T. Harv Eker (the author) got me there. Minutes before I read this particular idea in the book, I complained bitterly about my situation – not out loud but in my mind. So, this idea made me become aware that I actually used to complain when I thought I don’t used to complain simply because I don’t complain out loud for people to hear. Anyway, I decided to put this idea to work (in my head) and I caught myself several times (which I actually see as progress) and replace the thoughts immediately to thoughts of gratefulness.

iv. That if I really want to learn a business, I should get into it.

This idea hit me hard the day I read it. I wanted to go into a new business but was wasting time looking for startup capital when there were other parts of the business within my ability I could be working on so that when the startup finance actually comes in, I could kick-start the business immediately. I love what the author observed, “You’ll learn more by sweeping a restaurant and washing dishes than by ten years of research from the outside.” So, I dropped my pursuant for startup finance and got myself into the arena. Strangely enough, the startup finance I was looking for came.

v. That I should make a list of ten things I’m grateful for in my life and read the list aloud every morning for the next 30 days.

This idea has been a powerful booster for me. Even as I write this, the top ten things I’m grateful for are etched in my memory and I trigger them on cue (when I feel down) during the day to put me in a positive and empowered state to face the rigors and pressures of the day. Because of its profound effect on my state, I have decided to exceed 30 days; I want to do it for life!

vi. Practice admiring rich people, practice blessing rich people and practice loving rich people.

I’m laughing. Because this is something I do almost everyday that makes me smile ever since the author helped me to find the truth. Before now, I disdain the rich (I still can’t imagine I used to). Let me share an experience. One day, as I was passing by a popular fast food restaurant called Chicken Republic, I saw a young man with a package containing food he bought from the restaurant walking to his car. Immediately, my old pattern of disdaining the rich came to play: “Look at him,” I said in my mind, “Can’t these people ever cook and eat at home?” Instantly, I remembered the idea of admiring and blessing the rich, so I switched gears in my mind, “Hey! Big guy. I admire you. You should have bought more than that. That’s a nice car you have. I bless and love you. I hope to see you again here.”

vii. That I should think “both”, not “either/or”.

This is about the most important thing I learned from this book beside the money management system. As at the time I read this book, I was about cutting the time I spend in Church by almost 80% because I was thinking in “either/or” – that is, I don’t make much money because I spend more time in Church. In fact, I wanted to cut the time I spend with my family and others to face moneymaking. But the author helped me to realize that that is a poor way to think; that I can have both because both are important.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas will help me to be aware of the limiting and poor thoughts and replace them with noble and rich thoughts. It’s going to help me discover the root of my financial blueprint and to think and dream big in everything I do. And by sending out blessed thoughts and creating abundance, I’ll touch people’s lives in a positive way.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “Your income grows only to the extent you do.”

This quote helped me to swear to grow myself to the peak of my potential; to grow myself to the point that money will be chasing me instead of me chasing money; to grow myself to the point that millions will gather from all corners of the earth to hear me speak.

ii. “We are conditioned in these primary ways in every arena of life, including money: Verbal programming: what did you hear when you were young? Modeling: what did you hear when you were young? Specific incidents: what did you experience when you were young?”

This quote helps me to discover where my limiting money blueprint came from and to challenge it.

iii. “Saving for the rainy day might sound like a good idea, but it can create big problems. If you are saving your money for a rainy day, what are you going to get? Rainy days!”

This is important to me because the reality of saving for the rainy days have hit me times without number. I’ve had computer crashes and sicknesses that wipe out all the money I saved for the rainy days. More so, this quote is in consonant with the Law of Attraction which I strongly believe in.

iv. “If your primary motivation for acquiring money or success comes from a non-supportive root such as fear, anger, or the need to “prove” yourself, your money will never bring you happiness.”

I have told myself times without number that I’ll show them (folks who look down on me), I’ll make so much money and make them to eat back their words. Now, this quote has helped me to see that such stance and resolution will backfire in negative ways. So, now I want to make money because I want to make contribution, because I want to positively affect my generation.

v. “Seeking security comes from insecurity which is based on fear.”

This quote is important to me because it makes me see seeking security in a new perspective and to seek something better about money instead of security.

vi. “The biggest reason behind the fights people have about money is not money itself, but the mismatch of their “blueprints.” This goes for married couples, dating couples, family relationships, and even business associates. They key is to comprehend that you are dealing with blueprints, not money.”

This is important to me because it’s going to help me resolve financial issues in my relationships.

vii. “How well your business does is a result of your money blueprint. You will always validate your blueprint.”

I wanted to divorce my business success from my limiting money blueprint but this quote helps me to have a rethink and replace my old limiting money blueprint with the new one in my business.

viii. “You can try anything and everything else you want. You can develop your knowledge in business, in marketing, in sales, in negotiations, and in management. You can become an expert in real estate or the stock market. All of these are tremendous “tools.” But in the end, without an inner “toolbox” that is big enough and strong enough for you to create and hold on to large amounts of money, all the tools in the world will be useless to you.”

This quote gives “the why” of me not accumulating much money when I’ve acquired business, marketing, sales, and management skills.

ix. “You always get what you say you want – what you subconsciously want, not what you say you want.”

At times, even when I pray I have doubts in my mind. This quote calls me back to the need to be congruent in my thoughts and words.

x. “The primary mindset of poor people is “what if it doesn’t work?” or, more often, “It won’t work,” The middle-class people are slightly optimistic. Their mindset is “I sure hope this works.” Rich people take responsibility for their results and act upon the mindset “It will work because I’ll make it work.”

This powerful quote is important to me because it adds a winning expression to my success vocabulary.

xi. “Rich people are willing to promote themselves and their value. Poor people think negatively about selling and promotion.”

This quote, surprisingly, made me to be aware that I actually used to think negatively about promotion. I once saw a billboard ad by a certain Church about a conference they wanted to do. The next thing I said in my mind was, “Why are these people wasting money in promotion like this? Can’t they just print handbills and save some money?”

xii. “The size of the problem is never the issue – what matters is the size of you.”

This quote helps me to realize that if I have a big problem in your life, then it means I’m a small person and need to invest heavily in personal development.

xiii. “Rich people are excellent receivers. Poor people are poor receivers.”

This quote helps me attract good things into my life because as the author observed, when I’m not willing to fully receive, then I’m training the universe not to give to me. So, I now receive everything with all gratefulness.

xiv. “How you do anything is how you do everything.”

This quote gives me food for thought. It reminds to be committed to excellence in all I do – whether great or small.

xv. “Rich people choose to get paid based on results. Poor people choose to get paid based on time.”

Though I have been practicing this in some of the services I render, I’ve not looked at it from the angle of asking those who work for me to be paid based on result. The author made me realize this.

xvi. “Rather than say “When I have plenty of money, I’ll begin to manage it,” the reality is “When I begin to manage it, I’ll have plenty of money.”” Saying “I’ll start managing my money as soon as I get caught up” is like an overweight person saying “I’ll start exercising and dieting as soon as I lose twenty pounds.” First you start properly handling the money you have, then you’ll have more money to handle.”

This is one of the greatest things I learned from this book. It’s helped me to start managing the little money I have. Because as the author said, the habit of managing money is more important than the amount. It’s not just about what comes in; it’s about what I do with what comes in.

xvii. “Without passive income you can never be financially free.”

True talk. I like its brevity and simplicity. It’s something I can frame and place on a wall as a reminder. This is why it’s important to me.

xviii. “While poor people see a dollar as a dollar to trade for something they want right now, rich people see every dollar as a “seed” that can be planted to earn a hundred more dollars, which can then be replanted to earn a thousand more dollars.”

This quote is going to help me visualize money as seed and to realize I’m about to throw away seeds that could create a forest whenever I want to spend outside my budget or on impulse.

xix. “Rich people understand the order of success is BE, DO, HAVE.”

I used to think the other way round (HAVE, DO, BE) especially about my body and health. Now I realize it’s a formula for failure and heartache. As a result, I’ve put together a killer plan to develop myself first in order to Do and HAVE the things I want in life.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

Yes.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Ratings:

A. How interesting was it to read? 8
B. How helpful were the contents? 10
C. How easy was it to understand? 10
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 8

Raving Fans

Assessment By Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that just having satisfied customers isn’t good enough anymore because customers are only satisfied because their expectations are so low and because no one else is doing better. Therefore, if I really want a booming and sustainable business, then I must create Raving Fans.

i. That I should see my customers as individuals

This idea is important to me because implementing it will give me a competitive advantage. In the industry (bulk text messaging solutions) where my business operates, it is rare indeed for businesses to see their customers as individuals; they do mass marketing.

I intend to send my customers personalized offers with their name on it as against generalized mass marketing. This way, I hope to cause some ripples in the industry.

ii. That I should create a vision of perfection centered on the customer when he uses my products

This idea is important to me because it brings order and direction to the hitherto chaotic situation I found myself in business. I particularly like the part that says “when he uses my products.” It enables me to lock in my target and be hyper-focused on the kind of experience I really want my customer to enjoy.

For instance, I want to build a website that will load very fast – 3 seconds tops. I want a website that will appeal to my customers’ aesthetic needs, a site where people will like to visit to get educated. These are just a few things that I dreamed up after getting this idea from the book.

iii. That I should discover what customers want by asking them

This idea is important to me because before now I just assume I know what my customers want and I thought that asking them was hard work. As a result, I was heading no where in my business.

In implementing this idea, I designed a questionnaire and distributed it to potential customers and the feedbacks I got was quite revealing. For instance, I discover they wanted payment options that were convenient and safe for them as against the stressful “bank hall” payment almost everyone in the industry accepted.

iv. That I should know when to ignore what the customer want and, if necessary, tell the customer to take his vision elsewhere to be fulfilled

This idea is important to me because before now I thought customer service was about taking care of every need of the customer. No wonder I quaked under the excruciating work involved in going this way.

Now, when customers have requests, I know well to look at my vision and if it’s not part of my vision, I politely recommend another service to them.

v. That when asking customers for what they want, that I should listen closely both to what they say and what they don’t

This idea is an eye-opener laden with magnificent wisdom. I discover that, at times, I as a customer to other businesses do this. I may want something but won’t say it out. After all, I would think, they won’t do anything about it.

I don’t have any example yet, but I’m trying to train myself in doing this: to listen to what customers are saying and what they are not saying.

vi. That I should have a Raving Fan Index to measure performance periodically and tie it to employees’ raises and promotions

This idea is important to me because, again, it helps bring order to my customer service system. Plus, it helps to reinforce what I learned sometime ago that what gets measured gets done and what gets rewarded gets repeated.

I’m in the process of hiring a customer care representative to really implement this idea. I’ve been “solo-preneuring” all this while.

vii. That I should deliver the vision plus one percent

This idea is about delivering the vision little by little. According to the author, one percent improvement every week will amount to 52% at the end of the year. This idea is particular important to me because I swore to myself I won’t open doors for business until my customer care system is perfected, until I’ve put everything in place. As a result I kept my business in the cooler while my competitors were consolidating their market share I hope to open the shop of my new business sooner than I planned as a result of this idea.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas will help me to see my customers in a new light – human beings with needs coming to me to fulfill their needs. Again, I will not only apply these ideas in my business alone but also in other organization I lead. These ideas will help me to redefine what business is all about and bring sanity to the marketing industry that’s widely perceived as arm-twisting and dishonest. In so doing, I hope to be a model in customer service and business and organizational success.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “Quality is how well our product works in relation to the customer’s need. That’s just one aspect of customer service. Customer service covers all the customer’s needs and expectations.”

This statement is important to me because I actually used to think quality is about how good my company product appears to me. I didn’t event link it to anything customer service. Now, I can see customer service is holistic in nature.

ii. “A satisfied customer doesn’t count these days. Today, you need Raving Fans. You have to create Raving Fans to be successful.”

This quote is important to me because it helps me to look beyond satisfied customers and deliver services that will make customers rave about my business. This will help me cut down on marketing cost because my Raving Fans will help me do the marketing.

iii. “Service is so awful customers expect to be abused. People expect bad goods and rude service. Give them junk and they are not surprised. Just what they expected. As long as the abuse isn’t worse than they expected, they’ll be back for more. Do as survey. Check it out and they’ll say they’re satisfied.”

This quote is important to me because it states the reality in way I’ve never thought of before. I’ve been living in the world of creating satisfied customers for so long not knowing that that world is long gone.

iv. “Just having satisfied customers isn’t good enough anymore. You don’t own those customers. They’re just parked on your doorstep and will be glad to move along when they find something better.”

This statement is important to me because it gives me another compelling reason to be committed to creating Raving Fans.

v. “Successful organizations have one common central focus: customers. It doesn’t matter if it’s a business, a professional practice, a hospital, or a government agency, success comes to those, and only those who are obsessed with looking after customers.”

This quotes helps me to look beyond just business. Now, I’m also thinking in terms of church and NGO.

vi. “When all is said and done, goods aren’t sold; products and services are bought.”

This quote empowers me to help customer buy my products and not to sell them my products.

vii. “No one would dream of trying to design and market a sports car that was also a great off-road vehicle and at the same time serve as a commercial delivery van. Yet when it comes to customer service, those who decide to really try to give good service often aim to be everything to everybody. That doesn’t work.”

This quote is important to me because in my business I’ve tried to be everything to everybody hoping that the practice will put me head and shoulders above my peers. Did it work? My results say no. Now, I know better to be “something to everybody.”

viii. “Everyone touched by the product is a customer.”

This quote is important to me because it serves as an eye-opener. I’ve always believed that my customers are only people who buy my products and use my services. As a result, I lost customers that I would have won by not including them in my vision.

ix. “The vision has to be changing. Always developing. Visions do only two things. They grow or they die. And when visions die, it is customer service that gets buried.”

This quote is important to me because it is radically different from what I believed. I used to think that once a vision is created, it’s for life and never changing. Now, that notion sounds foolish to me. Customers’ needs change overtime and so visions have to change to continue to be relevant. This is what this quote makes me to understand.

x. “Listen to the music as well as the lyrics. Often what people really want doesn’t show up directly in what they say. They may even say one thing and mean quite another.”

Touché! This quote will help me to ask specific questions in order to discover what customers really mean by what they say.

xi. “Silence is a message and usually it’s not a good one.”

This quote is important to me because sometime ago, I sent out a feedback to my customers and most didn’t respond and I did nothing about them. Now, I know that that silence was a message and it wasn’t a good one.

xii. “When a customer complains, you know you’re hearing the truth. Listen to him. When a customer is a Raving Fan and is enthusiastic, listen to him too. But when a customer is silent or says ‘Fine’ with a smile, you have to really perk up your ears. You’ve got a problem. If nothing else, that customer isn’t a Raving Fan.”

This quote helps me to see customer complains as pure gold. And to take the answer: “Fine” with a pinch of salt.

xiii. “Past experience has taught people that chances are you don’t really want to know what they think and feel. If they are going to open up you have to first gain credibility… it can take a while, but if you take the time to get a conversation going, customers will sense you’re serious and will respond.”

Hmmn. Great words of wisdom. An important quote because I now know to gain credibility first. I also note learn that gaining credibility takes a while so I don’t have to hurry the process.

xiv. “If you don’t look after your people, they won’t look after your customers. And when they do, if you say thank you and reward them, they’ll do it again and again.”

An important quote to me because it serves as a reminder to first look after my own people and reward them for great service. There and then I count on them to look after my customers.

xv. “Consistency, consistency, consistency. Consistency is critical. Consistency creates credibility.”

An important quote because it reveals the key to gaining credibility.

xvi. “When you’re creating Raving Fans it’s a fragile relationship. They’ve been burned before and they don’t trust easily. You’re trying to pull them in and they are trying to resist. Consistency will overcome resistance, but in the meantime they are watching like a hawk for you to mess up.”

This quote will help me not to force it or beat up myself on the inside when I don’t create Raving Fans as fast as I’d want to.

xvii. “Promise more and deliver more. Just don’t promise too much at once.”

This quote is important to me because in the marketing world I’ve been taught to promise less and deliver more. This quote is a great paradigm shift based on a sound principle. And talking of not promising too much at once, that too, is a great advice for me, because like I said earlier, I’ve been delaying my business launch because I want to deliver everything at once.

xviii. “Customers allow themselves to be seduced into becoming Raving Fans only when they know they can count on you time and time again.”

I like the choice of words in that quotation. In addition, it gives me an insight to what it really takes to creating Raving Fans.

xix. “To be consistent, you have to have systems. At the core of every great customer service organization is a package of systems and a training program to inculcate those systems into the soul of that company. That’s what guarantees consistency.”

Another great quote because it gives me the keys to consistency.

xxx. “All systems in the world aren’t worth a pinch of salt if everyone isn’t trained to follow them.”

It serves as a reminder to take time to train my employees before allowing them go anywhere near the customer.

xxxi. “If you fall short of what you’ve said you’ll do, you’ve cheated the customer.”

I love the strong use of words there and I see it is the truth. It’s going to help me ensure I deliver on whatever I promise my customers.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

The book didn’t contain any exercise.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Ratings:

The Leadership Secrets of Jesus

Assessment By Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that we can become a winner like Jesus Christ by following his principle-based, inside-out leadership secrets.

i. That I should find those who need me and what I have to offer, then build my life around that contribution.

This idea is important to me because it comes at a point I discovered that to achieve sustainable succeed and be happy at what I do I need to build my life around my strength and passion. So, this idea is a kind of reinforcement. Before now, I always wonder whether what I’m doing is what I really should be doing.

For instance, I write, I create and market information product, I conduct training in public speaking, I have passion for leadership. And I was doing this all at once. At some point, I’ll get really confused. Now, I know better to stack them, find people who need what I have to offer, and build my life around those contributions. Great idea!

ii. That I should believe in my product.

This idea, too, is important to me because it comes at a point where I questioned the quality of my products based on the poor results I’m getting in sales. Looking closely, I realize the products are world-class judging from testimonials from the few customers who have bought and the problem really is that I don’t really believe in my products.

So, what I did was write down over 20 reasons why my products are of high quality and why people will buy them, and read it every morning, afternoon, and night for many days until it was entrenched in my unconscious mind. Now, whenever I catch myself thinking negatively about my products, handling it is as simple as mentally reviewing my list. It’s had enormous impact in my life generally.

iii. That I should never misinterpret my product.

This idea is important to me because the author pointed out that Jesus never misinterpreted his product. He laid out the total picture to his disciples showing them the pains and the gains. He didn’t hype, he didn’t sugar-coat his words. Coming back home to myself, I belong to an industry (marketing, to be specific) well-known for its hype, arm-twisting tactics, high-pressure sales techniques, and product misrepresentation. I followed this path few years back. For instance, I include false deadlines in salesletters because that’s what I was taught by so-called gurus.

But now I realize from the latest books I’m reading and from the results others and I are getting that the last men standing are the honest guys. So, yours sincerely now lays out what my product offers, include the price, and ask for the order. Those who need it will buy, those who don’t will bypass it. When this happens I simply focus on my next prospect instead of killing myself over prospects who don’t buy.

iv. That I should start my “People List” and use it to connect with people

I’ve always known that networking is something I should actively engage in if I really want to succeed big time. But somehow, I always get too busy and forget about this productive activity. This idea is so important to me because it is specific and it’s something I can stoop down to do immediately.

I did make a “People List” and started networking with people who have been around me all the while. And I was shocked recently when one of the people I was referred to gave me information that’s guaranteed to turn my life on its head positively. And the interesting thing is that I only spent about five minutes with this man and I got a highly-valuable piece of information worth its weight in gold.

v. That I should take one day a week off completely.

Super idea! Naturally, I love working. I work, work, and work. And it landed me in the hospital with a chronic health condition. I used to take one day a week off then, but I soon forgo the tradition. So, when I read this, it reminded me of the “good old days” and why I badly need to restart it. I’ve started taking Thursday off every week – no work, no phone, no Internet, just rest. And man I’m I better for it.

vi. That I should realize my business, products, and myself are seeds, so I may need to change locations to unlock the full potential of my success.

This idea is important to me because I’ve been dillydallying on whether to relocate on not. I’ve always known my present environment isn’t supporting my growth that I needed an atmosphere that will help in unlocking my full potential. I very much appreciate the point from which the author views it – as a seed. It’s helped me to reach a decision to move.

vii. That I should keep a prayer list and set a special time each day to pray, and if possible, have a special place.

Sometime ago, I read from a different book to make a prayer list and pray about items on my list everyday. I did and things that I wasn’t aware of were happening. Then something I can’t readily put my finger on now happened and I stopped praying with the list and many bad things began to happen – people I was praying for before died, one was expelled from school, and I barely made it through life myself. So, this idea is very important because it reminds me of something I should be doing and I particularly appreciate the idea of a special time and special place – this will help ingrain it as a habit I can’t do without.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas will help me to focus exclusively on my area of strengths, to evaluate new activities to engage in in the light of my strengths and choose the ones that play to my strengths and further my ambition. In addition, it will make me more productive by taking time to rest and help to build my faith in my products and to represent my products for what they are. In so doing, it will help me create a better world by symbolizing honesty, foresight, and passion – all, sterling qualities our world is in dire need of.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “Mind-management is the first priority for the overcomer.”

The word “first” got my attention. It helps me to rank mind-management at the top of priorities.

ii. “Doubt is deadly.”

I love the strong use of words. It acts as a negative pattern interrupt to me.

ii. “Your thoughts have presence.”

Again, I love the blunt way the author puts it. It’ll help me to control my thoughts knowing that they have presence, that people are seeing and hearing my thoughts.

iii. “You must make the time and make the effort to know your product… A lawyer must study new laws. A doctor must keep well-read on the latest journals concerning the body and new diseases. A policeman has to study his weapons, the laws of his community, his rights, and the mind-set of criminals. If he does not study this, he knows he is “a dead man in the streets.” His life is on the line.”

Another strong use of words. I’m particularly applying it to my business: if I don’t stay updated, my business is dead in the water.

iv. “Jesus spoke to many people of the good things and the benefits of what he offered, but he was also quick to talk to them about the total picture.”

This is important to me because it comes directly from Jesus who’s omniscient. So he knows what I don’t. So, if he told his disciples, and by extension we Christians, that we’ll suffer in this life, then I should also tell my team members of the pains they will go through as part of the total picture and not hide it from them.

v. “You’re already networked with the entire world.”

This quote helps me to realize that all I need to do is get up and network.

vi. “One notable president of the United States refused to make major decisions after 4:00 in the afternoon. He knew that a tired mind rarely makes good decision.”

Great reference. It’ll remind me to take major decisions that can wait till when I’m well rested and not to make major decisions superficially.

vii. “Rest is repair time. It is not a loss of productivity. It is time for renewing. It is receiving time. It helps release your potential.”

This quote is important to me because I always goad myself when I rest. There’s a little voice that plays in my head saying, “You should be working. You’re losing productivity.” The viewpoint of the author on rest is powerful – “repair time”, “time for renewing”, “receiving time”.

viii. “There are four kinds of people in your life: those who add, subtract, divide, or multiply. Every relationship will affect you – good or bad. Those who do not increase you inevitably will decrease you.”

This quote helps me to evaluate my present relationships and focus on building the ones that add and multiply.

ix. “Each relationship nurtures a strength or weakness within you.”

This quote helps me to ask myself this important question: “Which relationships nurture a strength in me and which relationships nurture a weakness in me?” Then I begin to look at those relationships in a new light.

x. “Your future starts with whatever is in your hand today. Nothing is too little to multiply. Everything is reproductive. Everyone has received something from God which is capable of reproducing.”

This quote is so important to me at this point that I printed it out and pasted it where I’ll see it always. I have products that can generate the capital I need to keep my business afloat but I keep thinking of borrowing. This quote has helped me to do the right thing by looking at what’s in my hands.

xi. “Jesus visited people where they work.”

It makes me realize that I don’t visit my followers where they work and to start doing it to make deposit in their “Emotional Bank Accounts.”

xii. “Jesus never begged anyone to believe in Him. He knew that integrity cannot be proven, it must be discerned.”

This quote empowers me to quit trying to make people believe in the kind of person I am.

xiii. “Passion is power. You will never have significant success with anything until it becomes an obsession with you. An obsession is something that consumes your thoughts and time.”

This quote helps me to ponder on things I’m really obsessed with and to focus on them because that’s where my success in life lies.

xiv. “Criticism is pointing out your flaws. Correction is pointing out your potential.”

An important distinction that will help me when I want to correct people or myself.

xv. “You will always remember what you teach.”

A powerful reinforcement on what I’ve realized to be true and to make it part of my personal development strategy.

xvi. “You are already important. You have nothing to prove to anyone. You are an offspring of a remarkable Creator.”

What an eye-opening statement! In the past few months I’ve been planning big on how to prove myself to my in-laws who are taking me at face value. What a waste of time, I now realize. I have nothing to prove, I am me. It’s left for them to discern that.

xvii. “It is more productive to set ten men to work than for you to do the work of ten men.”

This quote is important to me because it’s a forgotten precept. I learned it way back but forgot it and got busy doing everything myself. Now, I delegate almost everything.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

i. The author made this statement: “Rich people are not always happy people.” And I ask, “Always?” This is incorrect. As we have learned from people like the author, happiness is an inside thing, you can decide to be happy anytime you want whether you’re rich or poor.

ii. The author quoted one of the famous staff managers for the United States President who says, “I manage by the acorn management philosophy. I look for problems when they are the size of an acorn. I refuse to watch them grow into oak trees.”

My comment: While that is a good idea, a better and far more effective thing to do is to take steps to prevent the problems from happening in the first place because problems — whether they are big or small — are costly in human, time, and economic terms.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

The book didn’t contain any exercise.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Ratings:

A. How interesting was it to read? 7
B. How helpful were the contents? 8
C. How easy was it to understand? 10
D. Would you recommend it to others? 8
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 7

Cashvertising

Assessment by Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that I can create effective advertising that influences people to read my ads and buy like crazy by following principles and understanding consumer psychology.

i. That I should openly appeal to one or more of the Life-Force 8. In the book, the author calls our basic human needs “Life-Force 8.” Needs such as security, food, survival, approval, success, and so on. This idea is important to me because it’s helped me to increase not just the effectiveness of all my marketing messages, but my persuasive communications. For instance, in writing the sales copy to get people to forward my free report, I openly appealed to their need to help other people succeed by saying, “Make a Difference in the Lives of Nigerian Jobseekers.” And in composing the text message for my church’s evangelism program, I appealed to my audience’s basic need to belong: “Join other members to…” As a result, I’ve seen an increase in response to my marketing messages.

ii. That I should use credibility by osmosis. What the author means by credibility by osmosis is leveraging an authority figure to promote my business. This idea is important to me because it led me to go for great figures and institutions to sign up as customers to my business. I got two for a start which I’m going to feature on my website as my top clients to influence customers to buy my products.

iii. That I should use images in my ads to get attention and transfer good feelings. This idea is important to me because before now, I send out adverts without any images. But having reading this idea, I not only include ads in my marketing messages but also in my informational products like ebooks and reports. And I include the appropriate pictures in my blog posts as well. My statistics is reporting an increase in visitor engagement and in the amount of time people stay on my site. And also with the results I’m getting, it shows people are reading my ebooks from beginning to end.

iv. That I should write long engaging copies. This idea is important to me because I found myself sitting on the fence on this issue because of the myriad of opinions out there by so-called experts – should I write long sales copies or should I write short ones? People are in a hurry, you know? I thought. But with the way the author explained it, there was no more arguments or doubts in my mind as which is the best and most effective way for me. And so, I went ahead to write probably the longest copy for a bulk SMS website in Nigeria.

v. That I should be extremely specific in my ads. This is one of the greatest ideas from this book that stuck. It’s important to me because it kind of served as a powerful reminder to me of what I’ve learned before. Now, it’s become part of me. As a result, I went through all my marketing messages and transformed general and vague statements to specific messages. And I can feel the impact myself.

vi. That I should use longer guarantees than my competitors are using. This idea is important to me because it helped me to come up with a competitive advantage. I looked at the guarantees I gave for my products and services and increased 30-day money-back guarantees to 12-months. And I even offered to be paid by results! Though I haven’t tested, I’m confident it’s one of the factors driving the positive results I’m getting.

vii. That I should make it easy for people to pay me. This idea is so, so important to me because in my country, electronic payment is one big challenge we are facing. As a result, customers are reluctant to go to the bank to make payment. This idea gave me a simple way out. I decided to accept phone recharge cards (which is readily available on every street) as payment. With this people can pay on weekends and during holidays when banks don’t open in Nigeria. Indeed, this has contributed significantly to the result I’m getting in my business.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas will help me to craft deadly effective marketing messages in my business, in my personal communications, in my church; they will help me to shape the thoughts of the world. In a practical way, it’s helped me launch a weekly text message engineered to shape people’s thoughts for the best in order to make the world a better place.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “Research has found out that attitudes based on central route processing are more resistant to counter-persuasion and show greater attitude-behavior consistency than attitudes formed by peripheral route thinking.” This quote is important to me because it helps me to understand why people don’t change easily. It helped me to see the challenge I’m facing in my relationship and how to effectively deal with it.

ii. “…Another approach is to change the importance of beliefs, rather than the beliefs themselves. That’s because it’s easier to strengthen or weaken an existing belief than it is to change it.” This statement is important to me because it gave me a powerful way to influence people’s thoughts without arousing resentment or defensiveness.

iii. “Contrary to popular belief, men are most attracted to pictures of men, and women to pictures of other women.” A powerful quotation that gives purpose and direction to my use of pictures in my marketing messages.

iv. “Repeating your message not only helps break down walls of disinterest, but with each repetition your ad also gets exposed to those who may not have noticed it the last time. What’s more, with each repetition of your message, your audience naturally grows more familiar with your product and company. And unless they have reason to think otherwise, a feeling of acceptance begins to grow. As this acceptance strengthens, an affinity begins to develop. They, in essence, begin to feel comfortable with you. This comfort leads to greater trust, which opens the door to the sale.” This quote is so important to me because it helped me to thing big, sort of. I rarely repeat my ads. I place it once and if it doesn’t work, I bid it good bye. Now, I see why that has been a big mistake on my part.

v. “A product or service is more likely to be viewed favorably if the ad is long and contains numerous, credible facts and figures. It causes your prospects to say, in effect, “Wow…look how much is here. It must be true.” This statement is important to me because it helps me to justify the need for long sales copies.

vi. “Your sales letter is your salesperson. Think of it that way! It should be personal.” Keeping this in mind has helped me to create more personal marketing messages that connect with my prospects. I write as if I’m talking to them in a bar.

vii. “When people can’t distinguish you from your competition, they have no reason to prefer you. And your goal in business is to have people prefer your product, to choose you over everyone else offering the same or a similar thing.” This quote got me thinking about how to differentiate myself in the marketplace and how important it is. Now, I have a ready answer to clients I meet who ask why they should choose me over my competitors.

viii. “Make sure you put a picture of yourself on everything and you’ll become well known very quickly.” I love this. A great idea! I discover that I respect and revere authors and marketers who put their pictures in their book covers and marketing messages. The next product I’m working on certainly will have my picture on the cover.

ix. “Bigger ads attract more attention. This idea has been tested by various researchers using different methodologies, and they have all come to this same conclusion.” This quote helps me to think big and to see why I get little results from my marketing in the past.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6 . Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

The were no exercises to complete.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

Practical Intuition

Assessment By Edwin Akpan ( Nigeria )

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that I am already intuitive like every other person and I have been using it in decisions whether I realize it or not.

i. That I should just pretend as if intuitive information makes sense

This idea is important to me because these things are difficult to believe. But my pretending and confirming that it is true, I’ve now fully embrace and trust my intuition.

Sometime ago, I was in a commercial bus on a highway and suddenly I got a flash of a big truck hitting our bus and me hitting my head on the seat facing me. In fact, I could feel the sharp pain literally. I prayed silently for safety. Minutes later, I heard a bang from the back and our driver lost control of the bus… we were hit by a big truck. Though this kind of literal information is rare, I’ve been symbolically warned that something bad was going to happen.

ii. That while getting impressions I should record everything, even impressions that seem like interference

This idea is important to me because when I want to intuit, I will be doubting my impressions. Knowing from the beginning that I should record “everything, even impressions that seem like interference” has helped me not to dismiss genuine impressions.

For instance, I’ve recorded the sound of a car, the noises of children, and other things that seem to b senseless but turned out to make sense.

iii. That I should arbitrarily use metaphors that will indicate a yes and no

This is important to me because at certain points in life I get important questions that demand a yes or no answer. I will be confused even with other logical answers available to me.

For instance, a friend of mine was overdue for child delivery and she asked me to help a look up a certain drug used to induce labour – whether she should use it or not. Even though I did a thorough research on it, I was still confused. So, I resorted to an intuitive metaphor and got a yes. She took it and didn’t come to any major harm, and to God be the glory, she delivered safely.

iv. That I should consciously supply checks by seeking “signposts”

This idea is important to me because, as the author says, life is hardly black or white. For instance, if I get an impression that someone is going to be transferred to another state by his company, I could supply a check by asking my intuition where the person will live next year.

Though I haven’t used it in any situation yet, I’m convinced it is certainly going to help me to be accurate in my intuitions.

v. Each person must find his or her on way to get in touch with the intuitive state

This idea is important to me because it helped me to realize that the approach that works for someone else may not necessarily work for me. I discover I get in touch with my intuitive state at dawn where everywhere is very quiet and still dark. I’m still monitoring it to find an optimum approach that works well for me, though.

vi. That I should deliberately label my impressions as I articulate them and divide them into three categories: genuine intuitive impressions, imagined intuitive impressions, and interference, then use feedbacks to discover which of these tend to be accurate “hits” and which are off the mark.

While intuiting, it’s always every easy for me to get distracted or bring in my memory and feelings into the equation. And when that happens, I always know. So, this idea helps me to categorize my “hits” and know which hits to go with as I make my decisions using the information my intuition supply.

vii. That I should seek my own intuitive style

The author suggests I should look over the type of information I receive whether I receive primarily letters or complete words, which sense is dominant, and so on.

In heeding this advice, I’m going to allow my intuition provide a structure for me of it operates in me and this will enable naturally open myself up to the style unique to me. This will help simply the process for me and make it more or less effortless.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas will help me to relax consistently, to be very conscious of what I’m feeling, hearing, and seeing around me, and how they are connected to me and the people I know. It will help me to be conscious of the questions I ask, and to ask the right questions in the right way and to help others do the same. In doing so, problems that could be averted will be averted and we can all live together with purpose when we ask the right questions and find answers to them.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “Gaining conscious control over your intuition is like learning to ride a bicycle – it takes some practice to get a hang of things, but once you have the knack it’s not difficult at all.”

This quote will help me to be patient as I practice using my intuition.

ii. “Each day when I went to the hospital, I felt an instinctive need to breathe in a certain way until my body got very warm. In my mind’s eye I could see the parts of her body that needed healing, and I would send this warmth – this energy – to them. After two weeks, my mother emerged from coma and went on to make full recovery.”

This quote is important to me because it reminded of the instinct I got to bathe my eyes with my tears day and night to heal me of the eye condition that’s still without cure in the medical world.

iii. “We don’t need to know how intuition works to use it.”

It helped me to drop my search for how it really works and to start using it and to help others understand this. After all, I don’t know how the television works, but I use it.

iv. “Your mind and body will need all the rest and care you can get. Eat good meals. Take walks. Exercise. Stretch. Get a massage.”

This quote is important to me because it helped me to see that everything is integrated, that if I want to get into an intuitive state, I must learn to take good care of my body.

v. “A question properly phrased is half answered.”

This quote makes me to sit back and time to phrase my questions and also to be conscious of the questions I perpetually and unconsciously ask myself.

vi. “Intuition is a capacity you’re born with as a human being, like the capacity for language or thinking or appreciating music. Intuition is not a power one acquires. It’s an integral part of every human mental, emotional, and physical process.”

I thought intuition was the exclusive preserve of a privileged few. But this quote opens my understanding to the fact we are all born we it. After all, the Bible calls us gods. (Psalm 82:6)

vii. “Each moment – right now – you receive information intuitively; you’re simply unaware of the process. You use your intuition in all those practical reasoned decisions you make every day from choices as mundane as what to eat for dinner to what to major ion or who to marry.”

This quote is important to me because it further helps me to trust intuition. It did so by reminding me of the fact that I chose who to marry largely based on intuition.

viii. “As creatures increasingly cut off from our environment by high technology, we have lost touch with our senses as well as our intuition.”

It helps me to take periodic breaks and commune with nature so I can receive information for my survival and success in life.

ix. “There are no coincidences. Every thing you perceive – everything you sense, or remember, or feel, or dream, or intuit, in short, everything you notice – has meaning. Everything… the trick is knowing what question the information is answering.”

This quotes helps me to take things that appear coincidental very serious. For instance, I called a brainstorming meeting to help out a certain youth who was confused as what to do first academically – whether to go to the university to study engineering or go to a seminary in order to become an evangelist (his lifelong passion). During the meeting two people keep using the phrase “count your cost” before you do anything. I had a radically different view from what they were saying, so when I open a book to read something to them, I saw the phrase: “count your cost. You must really take your time to cost your cost.” I was shocked. I didn’t discount it and I sincerely shared it with my team members who I didn’t agree with, then I agreed we should “count the cost.” We reached a decision that looked perfect and wise.

x. “You have to allow the meanings of your symbols to come to you, and this may take time. Trust your intuition. Don’t try to “figure out” the answer. Simply allow yourself to notice the images or symbols and other impressions a question brings out in your intuition.”

This quote will help me to be patient and not to force the process.

xi. “Intuition is often symbolic and fragmentary.”

Even though I read the book from cover to cover, I surprisingly missed the fact that intuition is symbolic until I came across this quote.

xii. “People tend to be intuitive in the areas their emotional occupations. A person fearful of losing his job during a period of corporate layoffs, for example, is going to have intuitive antennae fully extended to puck up any sign of danger. The intuition of a new mother is going to be finely tuned to pick up any information about her child.”

This quote is important to me because it helps explain how I easily get intuitive hits in certain areas and not in other areas.

xiii. “Intuition is knowing without knowing why you know.”

Another quotation that helps me to use intuitive data without really knowing why.

xiv. “With intuition, you can even answer questions about topics you know nothing about.”

Wow! This quote heightens my interest in using intuition full blast.

xv. “Symbols are a highly sophisticated form of communication. They convey a great deal of detail much more economically than do literal words.”

I argued with why intuition should be symbolic and not plain literal. This quote helps me to understand why it is so. After all, we all believe that a picture is worth a thousand words.

xiv. “All your senses respond to the questions our environment and our “body machine” pose – that’s their job. Your rational mind’s job is to interpret the information provided by these senses for more efficient survival. Your intuitive mind’s job is to interpret these senses for the same purpose.”

This quote provides an answer to the question I’ve been asking myself: “Why do we need intuition?”

xv. “Getting in touch with your intuition is a process of self-discovery. As you practice using your intuition, you’ll discover certain talents and habits, preferences and rituals that are more conducive than others. To take a simple example, you may learn that you work better in the morning rather than at the end of the day. You may find that you’re more efficient with your eyes closed than open. You may discover that you prefer questions written on paper or read aloud.”

This quote helps me to develop my own intuitive style.

xvi. “The best use of intuition is not to decide whether you should do something but simply to add information to what you already know and feel.”

Admittedly, I’ve used intuition exclusively to know whether I should do something or not. Now, I know better that that is not the best use of it.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6 . Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

There were many exercises and I completed them and I found them extremely useful.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

A. How interesting was it to read? 9
B. How helpful were the contents? 9
C. How easy was it to understand? 9
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 9

Change the World

Assessment By Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that every one of us can change the world by first changing ourselves.

i. That I should envision a productive community where everyone is a servant and all are equals while I am the chief servant or “first among equals”

This idea is important to me because in relationships and communities where I function as a leader, I always see myself as the superior and my followers see me as such as well. But the author has enlightened me that as a change agent, I should envision a productive community where I am the chief servant as taught by Jesus, Gandhi, and Luther King. This mind-blowing idea is going to help me re-brand myself and help shape my followers perception of me everywhere I lead.

ii. That I should first looking within myself when seeking change in any community

This idea is important to me because it compelled me to look inside of me for my recent relationship breakup, lack of growth in business, poor finances, and my health problems. I discovered so many things about me that if I could change will dramatically bring about the change I want. For instance, in my relationship issue, I discovered that the message I sent was not the one I intended, I intended to project myself as being capable of doing anything, but ended up projecting the opposite, among other weaknesses.

In fact, this idea has dramatically shifted my attention from my change target to myself. Hopefully, with the new set of actions I’m embarking on, things should turn around for good.

iii. That I should see and own up my hypocritical self

This idea was difficult to accept, but I realize it’s true. This idea helps me to see how I have been a hypocrite in many ways, in many relationships: I espouse one thing, but act another, while expecting change to happen. How funny to me now! Now, I’m embracing my hypocrisy and making some fundamental choices in my life.

iv. That I should face my fears and honestly ask myself why I am afraid

What a powerful idea! “Why am I afraid?” This idea led me to ask this powerful question of my fears. And I’m glad to announce that I have stripped my fears of their power over me and released their grip on me. For instance, in my business, in taking a loan from the bank I was afraid. Then I asked myself, What am I afraid of? The answer was that I am afraid that I couldn’t pay back in time. “Based on what?” I asked myself again. I was able to come with a workable plan that proved I could pay back, then the fear lost its power. Now, I’m going for the load with unflinching confidence.

v. That I should choose collective good over personal good

This idea is important to me because it reinforced my belief that the root cause of problem in the world, in families, in organizations, in relationships is selfishness. This happens when individuals choose personal good over collective good. And I strongly believe that this caused my relationship to breakup. This idea is going to help me choose collective good over personal good when the opportunity presents itself for me as a leader and change agent.

vi. That I should disturb the system

By disturbing the system, the author means that I should initiate change and welcome chaos as a necessary process to bring about change. This idea is important to me because when my relationship was on the verge of breaking up, we were both confused and I did the normal thing by trying to bring order instead of feeding the confusion so that we both could really appreciate some things and come upon order on the other side of chaos.

I’m going to radically apply this idea to my business and the youth ministry I serve in the Church.

vii. That I should surrender myself to the emergent process

This also is a difficult idea, but one that works wonders. It’s important to me because right now in my life a lot of things are happening in my relationship, business, health, and life generally. And my first-blush response is to fight it, instead of seeking for lessons to grow thereby.

Now, I’ve surrendered. It seems to be that all IIGL books I’m reading at a particular time always speak to my situation. It’s like this particular book was written for me and at a time like this, too.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas will help me look within myself for the change I wish to see in others, in communities; it will help me question my fears in every area of my life, it will help me to see my hypocritical self, initiate change, embrace chaos, and surrender to the emergent process. By sincerely doing all these, I believe the change I see will come naturally and the world will be a better place for it.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “There are three general strategies for change in a normal situation. The three strategies are telling (making logical arguments for change), forcing (using forms of leverage such as the threat of being fired or being ostracized), and participating (using open dialogue and pursuing win-win strategies).”

This quote helps me to know the strategies available and their weaknesses and to choose a transformational strategy for change.

ii. “Commitment and the courage to continue one’s course in the face of externally imposed punishments tends to change the perception of others.”

This quote is important to me because I have been criticized and ridiculed for starting and running a business instead of looking for job. Sticking with my course over the years has earned me respect and dignity. So, I find this quote as a positive reinforcement.

iii. “As we conquer ourselves, we come in contact with a source of internal power that is not experienced by normal people living normalized lives.”

Serves as an encouragement for me to live a transformational life.

iv. “We do not need to be in positions of high authority to be transformational. In fact, we need to have no authority except the authority of our own souls.”

This quote is important to me because it challenges a deeply-held believe that one has to be in a position of authority to effect change.

v. “KING: Nonviolent resistance does not seek to defeat or humiliate the opponent but to win his friendship and understanding… The aftermath of nonviolence is the creation of the beloved community, while the aftermath of violence is tragic bitterness.”

An important quote by Martin Luther King Jnr – it helps me to relax my drive to “violently” resist a way of thinking in my community that affected me so much.

vi. “It is normally assumed that parents are superior to children, teachers are superior to students, coaches are superior to players, bosses are superior to subordinates, and so on.”

This quote is important to me because it lets me know that it’s just an assumption and not reality and that such relationships should be a relationship of equals.

vii. “When differences exist, there is, of necessity, a hierarchy. This hierarchy is not like our normal picture of hierarchy. This hierarchy is paradoxical. People in higher positions see themselves as the servants of those in lower positions.”

Helps me to have a radically different viewpoint on hierarchy and why it is necessary.

viii. “SCHECHMAN: Hierarchies don’t do damage to businesses any more than alcohol creates drinking problem. Structures don’t create problems; people do.”

I like the analogy by Schechman; it helps me to understand better that there is nothing inherently wrong with hierarchy.

ix. “To be truly creative, we must be willing to accept punishment. No one in the academic world, not even the most brilliant superstar, feels accepted. There is always someone around to criticize what we do. We are punished for failure. Surprisingly, we are punished for success. If we succeed, we come to stand for something and that thing always gets criticized.”

This observation helps me to see criticism as something that comes with the territory when one is a change agent.

x. “We can learn our way through virtually any situation.”

This quotes gives me power, something to think about whenever I’m faced with difficult situations.

xi. “Whenever I am in a change situation, I almost always ask the terrible question: How am I practicing hypocrisy in this situation?”

Provides me with a powerful question to ask in a change situation.

xii. “CHATTERJEE: We can practice the law of transcendence by progressively letting go of our urge to hold onto things, objects, addictions, and our urge to be important or powerful. Letting go does not in any way diminish ourselves, it does not make us less influential or less powerful. On the contrary, it extends our human capacity for action in infinite ways.”

Helps me to immediately let go of my urge to be powerful or important. In fact, it helps me to imagine a situation where my power and importance will be challenged or something I hold so dear will be taken away from me and how I will just let it go.

xiii. “Real change leaders are willing to challenge their bosses. They do so not in an arrogant or offensive way but with conviction that everyone can benefit by following through on this challenge.”

Challenging my “superiors” is something I find very difficult to do. This quote gives me confidence and how to go about it effectively.

xiv. “We cannot really begin to understand a system until we try to change it.”

Empowers me to initiate change in order to understand a system.

xv. “Surrendering oneself to the process is a very difficult concept. It violates one of the primary rules of the normalized model: “Always appear to be in control.”

Empowers me to appear NOT to be in control and surrender myself to any emerging process.

xvi. “Be the message that you are trying to convey.”

Helps me to break away from the norm of hypocrisy.

xvii. “Excellence is a dynamic process that involves real-time learning.”

Gives me another powerful reason to engage in real-time learning for life.

xviii. “Change agents see the need to both challenge and support people, recognizing that only when they feel supported and relatively safe will they take risks.”

Helps me to powerfully understand human psychology and to use it to bring about change.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6 . Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

No.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Ratings:

A. How interesting was it to read? 7
B. How helpful were the contents? 10
C. How easy was it to understand? 9
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 8

The Power of Impossible Thinking

Assessment By Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that our mental models – the brain processes we use to make sense of our world – profoundly shape every aspect of our lives and determine the quality and direction of our lives. Therefore, to change our world, we must first change our own thinking.

i. That I should recognize the power and limits of mental models.

This idea is important to me because it helps me to look at different areas of my life to see how my own thought processes have been limiting me. I even see it in mundane situations. For example, I once led a team to do a certain job, while coming back, our bus refused to start. We tried many different things like pushing it, switching batteries, re-fuelling it, but it just won’t start – all because of our mental models. But someone came along and suggested we check the car security and when a security button was pushed once, the car started!

ii. That I should test the relevance of my mental models against changing environment, generate new models and develop an integrated portfolio of models

This idea is important to me because it helped me to sit back and reflect on the way I do things and why I do them, then test it against the results I’ve been getting from my environment. In so doing, I was able to discover new ways of thinking and generate a portfolio of models. For instance, in marketing my business, I’ve been over-relying on long-format sales letters online while relegating other approaches to the background. But looking back at it, I realize it can only take me so far. So, I decided to integrate it to other marketing approaches and I’ve been getting greater results.

iii. That I should overcome inhibitors to change by reshaping infrastructure and the thinking of others

This idea is important to me because it helped me to understand – first – that infrastructures exist that act as restraining forces to change – both and without. By recognizing this fact, I’m able to observe and isolate inhibitors to change and how to effectively reshape and deal with them so that the needed change can happen.

An instance is that of wanting to change my environment. I know it will help me achieve my goals faster but I kept putting it off because of the subtle infrastructures I’ve naturally built around it. By realizing it and reshaping my thinking, I’m changing my environment for good.

iv. That I should transform my world by acting quickly upon the new models, continuously experimenting and applying a process for assessing and strengthening my models

This idea is important to me because it’s helped me to act quickly on new ways of doing things driven by new models. I now act quickly because I see it as an experiment and an opportunity to rest or reinforce a particular model. For example, I experimented holding a seminar on a Thursday instead of the usual Saturday and I got very useful feedbacks which I’ll use to form an opinion in future when I want to hold another seminar.

v. That I should question my routine

This idea is important to me because it helped me to stop and question my routine – the time I go to work, the days I work, what I do, and so on – and to see if it’s strategic. By so doing, I was able to discover what I’ve been doing that made me ineffective. For instance, I rarely create time for reflection and meditation and I’m always distracted by the internet. So, what I did was to ensure I leave my computer and Internet in the office, work less, and reflect more. As a result, I was able to work strategically by using that time to reflect and to write which is contributing to my long term success in business.

vi. That I should engage in a continuous zooming in and out

The authors used the term “zooming in and out” to refer to looking at the details and the big picture. This idea is important to me because it helps me to look up and ask what I’m really working to achieve.

For instance, once in a while, during my working hours, I used to get calls from friends and family members who need my help. I usually ignore it, but with this idea, I now look at the big picture and see that even my work is about building relationships, then I’ll pause and go and attend to my relationship first instead of being slaved to my daily to-dos.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas will help me to observe my thought processes, develop and test new models of thinking everyday and help others to do the same. In so doing, I hope to transform my world and serve as a light to others.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “One of the most enduring – and perhaps limiting – illusions is our belief that the world we see is the real world.”

This quote is important to me because it’s helped me to question what I see as reality. I’m now more open instead of being absolute and rigid.

ii. “What we see is what we think and what we think is what we see.”

This quote helps me to be careful about what I feed my eyes on and what I allow myself to think.

iii. “Revolutions are not absolute, so we need to keep a portfolio of models and choose the one that works best for a given situation.”

iv. This quote helps to keep some of my old ways of doing things so I can call on them when the need arises.

v. “Sometimes we don’t need to merely “sharpen” the saw; we need to throw it out to pick up a power tool. If we are focused only on sharpening, then we might not see the opportunity to apply new technology that can radically change the way we approach the task. The sharpest saw in the tool box may be no match for a powerful new approach based on a new way of looking at the world.”

This quote offers me a radical new way of thinking. I’ve always been thinking in terms of sharpening the saw as a metaphor without any thought that a better tool may be available for me to use.

vi. “In today’s complicated and uncertain environment, the greatest dangers are not from beasts prowling around outside. More often than not they are in our own minds, our inability to see our own limits and to see things differently. It is these internal beasts that we seek to better understand and learn to live with, if not tame.”

This quote helps me to always see myself as the problem, and not think that the problem is out there – to realize that the way I look at the problem is the problem.

vii. “As a mature organization, you may need to create processes for reporting the information around the fringes rather than just looking at the big averages or the statistics that you have always tracked. These past statistics will tell you where you have been but not where you are headed. You need to look for differences that indicate your old model is not working or that the potential for a new model has emerged.”

This quote helps me to realize that just having statistics of the past is not enough.

viii. “The more you rely on systems to guide your actions, the more you may erode the intuition to see something new.”

This quote will help me not to over-rely on systems.

ix. “Rather than an absolute and irrevocable shift from one paradigm to another which is the way revolutionary advocates of new paradigms often paint the picture – new paradigms exist side-by-side. If we recognize this, we can take a pragmatic approach in choosing from new and old paradigms in addressing any given problem.”

This quote is important to me because while canvassing for a change in the church, I stopped attending meeting because I see it as our main problem – but this quote helps me to see it that the meeting has its own advantages and without it, we can’t make progress.

x. “While new models are usually adopted and applied based on their utility – the car is far superior to the horse for transportation – this one-way “religious conversion” can lead to zealous applications of the model beyond the point of true utility.”

This quote helps me not be over-zealous in the application of new models and NOT to say this way of thinking is necessary superior to that way of thinking. I always make this mistake before.

xi. “One of the oldest paradigms of human thinking is the need for a black-and-white world. If there are two choices, we want to choose either A or B as superior – not live with both of them. We want a clear winner and very uncomfortable with ambiguous situations.”

This helps me to understand human psychology and what to do when people think this way.

xii. “If we fail to engage in continuous experiments, we may find ourselves in a painful situation or suffer the traumatic failure of our current model. If we do not periodically test the strength of our relationship we might be surprised by the sudden failure of marriage. If we don’t experiment with new ideas and pay attention to the feedbacks from peers and supervisors at work, we may find ourselves out of a job.”

I find the quote important to me because it just happened in my relationship. And I learned the hard way.

xiii. “See your current model for what it is, a model, rather than treating it as a reality. View the decision you are about to make as an experiment and ask yourself: What are you hoping to learn from it? What hypothesis are you testing? Can you put mechanisms or review processes in place to monitor results and learn?

Helps me to experiment more and to document lessons learned from my endeavors.

xiv. “People may adopt new models by coming under the influence of a charismatic leader or organization, which supplies a new mental model as well as infrastructure to support it.”

Helps me to develop myself as a charismatic leader and to provide infrastructure when shaping people’s thoughts.

xv. “Whatever path we take to implement and embrace a new model in our lives, we almost always have to give something up, and this “something” is usually much more than a way of thinking.”

Helps me to understand my psychology and that of others and to be patient with myself and others when trying to shape their way of thinking.

xvi. “Our mental models potentially isolate us from others, and this isolation and separation can lead to problems.”

This quote is important to me because I isolate myself from church meetings thinking I was sending a message but the problems I was trying to solve persisted. I’ll start attending the meetings again.

xvii. “It isn’t always necessary to convert the whole world at once or even your target audience. You can sometimes start with the most receptive audiences, building a following and then come back en masse to the original group.”

This quote is important to me because it’s helped me to reshape my thinking and not to kill myself trying to convert a large number of people at once.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6 . Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

No.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

Principle-Centered Leadership Assessment

Assesment By Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that enduring leadership is one that is based on principles – a leadership model where leaders can expect to transform their organizations and their people by communicating vision, clarifying purposes, making behavior congruent with belief, and aligning procedures with principles, roles, and goals, and empowering people “to do it on their own.”

i. That I should integrate the following developmental process to my ongoing training program: First, capture the content of the material, the essence of what is presented – seeking to understand the basic principles. Second, expand on what you have learned – adding your ideas and thoughts. Third, teach the material – sharing what you have learned with others to increase understanding, to create a common vocabulary for change, and to unlock the perceptions that others have of you. Fourth, apply the principles – putting them to the test in your immediate circumstances. And fifth, monitor results.

This idea is very important to me because I want to start a leadership academy and this unique developmental process will come in extremely useful to create an effective training program. As a matter of application, I’ve already applied it in my business to train my customer-care and marketing representative. The result? It freed me up to work in strategic areas and the trainee came up with mind-blowing ideas of his own. Amazing stuff!

ii. That I should write commitment down and keep them in front of me.

This idea is important to me because when I read books especially personal development books, I’m easily inspired by them and convinced that if I apply what they teach, I’ll achieve the goals I set. But what usually happens is that I soon forget about them and this has not been helping me at all.

So, with this idea, here is what I now do: I type and print out the commitments and put it under my pillow and read it day and night. For instance, I’ve printed out commitments I made from the book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, and apply the idea above. Now, living the principles taught in the book has become second nature to me.

iii. That I should allow my growth process follow a natural sequence.

This idea is so important to me because the author makes me to understand that I am at different “days” (levels of growth) in physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual areas. He encouraged me not to rush it using the analogy of a child crawling before walking and walking before running. This idea helps me to be patient with myself in areas of generating income and business building, because at times, with all I know, I used to feel disappointed in myself in these areas.

iv. That my mission statements should reflect all four basic human needs: economic or money need, social or relationship need, psychological need, and spiritual or contribution need.

This idea is important to me because I’ve created mission statements for different projects but it never reflected all four basic areas of human needs. I see this as the reason that people don’t buy to it easily. Now, I’m going to recreate my mission statements to reflect these fundamental areas.

v. That I should make my business’ human resource development (HRD) program effective by making the learner responsible for his learning.

This idea is important to me because I applied it in my business and it helped me to empower my workers and free up my time, while setting their creativity free and helping them to be more responsible.

vi. That I should clear communication lines by adopting the following attitudes and behaviors:

Attitudes

– I assume good faith; I do not question your sincerity or your sanity

– I care about our relationship and want to resolve this difference in perception. Please help me to see it from your point of view

– I am open to influence and am prepared to change

Behaviors

– Listen to understand

– Speak to be understood

– Start dialogue from a common point of agreement, and move slowly into areas of disagreement

This idea is important to me because one of my key relationships is suffering from blockage in communication and I hope to use this idea to clear the communication lines and settle the issues between us.

vii. That I should develop a family mission statement

I’ve heard of mission statements in the business world, but haven’t heard of one for a family. Though I don’t have a family of my own yet, this idea has led me to create one for a relationship I’m in now hoping that it will lead to us forming a family. And the mission has been helping us navigate through rough times, we constantly remind ourselves of the mission when we go off course and it’s been helping us to get back on track.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas will help me to be a great leader by empowering people and leaving them to do their thing while I serve as a helpful resource; it will help me to teach the things I learn to better understand it while helping people attain their highest value at the same time. I believe that in so doing, I can develop myself and other people to create a better world.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “The vast majority of the work force possess far more capability, creativity, talent, initiative, and resourcefulness than their present jobs allow or require them to use.”

This quote helps me to delegate more to my team members and they have been surprising me with their ingenuity.

ii. “When trust is high, we communicate easily, effortlessly, instantaneously. We can make mistakes and others will still capture our meaning. But when trust is low, communication is exhausting, time-consuming, ineffective, and inordinately difficult.”

This quote helps me to know the basic cause of communication difficulties in my relationships and to deal with it.

iii. “Once you get principles at the center, you realize that the only way to treat people is how you want them to treat you. You see your competition as a learning source, as friends who can keep you sharp and teach you where your weaknesses are. Your identity is not threatened by them or by other external conditions because you have an anchor and a compass.”

This quote helps me to see my competitors in a new light, not to primarily seek to be number one in my field of endeavor.

iv. “Practices are the what to do’s, specific applications that fit specific circumstances. Principles are the way to do’s, the elements upon which applications or practices are built. Without understanding the principles of a given task, people become incapacitated when the situation changes and different practices are required to be successful. When training people, we often teach skills and practices without principles, we tend to make people dependent on us or others for further instruction and direction.”

This quote helps me to transform my business systems, processes, and policies by including the principles our practices and systems are based on.

v. “Trustworthiness is based on character, what you are as a person, and competence, what you can do. If you have faith in my character but not in my competence, you still wouldn’t trust me.”

Helps me to work on both my character and competence in order to improve my trustworthiness, and not just on one of them.

vi. “Principle-Centered people don’t overreact to negative behaviors, criticism, or human weaknesses. They realize that behaviour and potential are two different things. They believe in the unseen potential of all people.”

This quote helped to diffuse my anger about something that someone did to me recently and helped me to look upon her with compassion.

vii. “Replacing a deeply imbedded bad habit with a good one involves much more than being temporarily “psyched up” over some simplistic success formula, such as “”Think positively” or “Try harder.” It takes deep understanding of self and of the principles and processes of growth and change. These include assessment, commitment, feedback, and follow-through.””

This quote is important to me because I’ve been trying to break a deeply imbedded bad habit to no avail using some success formulas, now I know better.

viii. “We would soon break our resolutions if we don’t regularly report our progress to somebody and get objective feedback on our performance. Accountability breeds response-ability. Commitment and involvement produce change.”

This quote helps me to seek an accountability partner and to take the principle very serious.

ix. “Certainly we should be interested in the opinions and perceptions of others so that we might be more effective with them, but we should refuse to accept their opinions as facts and then act or react accordingly.”

Helps me to know what to do with people’s opinion of me.

x. “People with primary greatness have a sense of stewardship about everything in life, including their time, talents, money, possessions, relationships, family, and even their bodies. They recognize the need to use all their resources for positive purposes, and they expect to be held accountable.”

Helps me to be accountable particularly for what I do with my time.

xi. “People with primary greatness return kindness for offense, patience for impatience. They bring out the best in those around them by seeking to bless when being cursed, to turn the other cheek, to go the second mile, to forgive and forget, to move on in life with cheerfulness, believing in the potential goodness of people and the eventual triumph of truth.”

This quote helped me in my most trying moment to be kind to someone who betrayed me when all I seek was vengeance.

xii. “There are times to teach and train and times not to teach. When relationships are strained and charged with emotion, attempts to teach or train are often perceived as a form of judgment and rejection. A better approach is to be alone with the person and to discuss the principle privately.”

This commonsense quotation lets me know the right time to teach and not to engage in a futile exercise to teach when my relationships are strained.

xiii. “To improve, we must start from where we are, not from where we should be, or where someone else is, or even from where others may think we are.”

Helps me to own up my ignorance and look within and not without for where to start seeking knowledge from in areas where I’m lacking.

xiv. “The more a leader is honored, respected, and genuinely regarded by others, the more legitimate power he will have with others.”

This quote is important to me because it’s helped me to continuously work on earning my followers respect and honour so that I can have legitimate power with them.

xv. “From time to time we have experiences that change our frame of reference or the map through which we view the territory, the objective world. When this happens our behavior often changes to reflect the new frame of reference; in fact, the fastest way to change a person’s behavior is to change his map or frame of reference by calling him a different name, giving him a different role or responsibility, or placing him in a different situation.”

Helps me to understand the complex dynamics of human behaviour and how to quickly engineer behavioral change.

xvi. “Skills development takes practice. A person cannot improve his tennis game merely by reading tennis books or watching great tennis players. He must get out on the court and practice what he has read or seen, progressing slowly through different levels of proficiency.”

This quote helps me to have a different and empowering perspective on my financial skills, to roll up my sleeves and get on to the financial playing field, to take risks, to experiment.

xvii. “The natural tendency of most organization is to forecast by extrapolating trends and they call it strategic planning. The leaders of these organizations never really ask, “Where do we want to be in five years?” or “What kind of an organization do we want to have?” Instead they become very reactive to the environment, to the stream, it doesn’t reflect the vision. Other organizations become so mission- or vision-driven that their strategy does not reflect the stream. Good strategic planning reflects both vision and stream.”

This powerful quote helped me to pause and think about where I want my business to be in the next five years in a holistic sense.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

No.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Ratings:

Ultimate Guide to Google Ad Words
Assessment By Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that Google AdWords can increase the profitability of my business in a way and at a cost no other medium can because it connects me with people who are already “sold” on the business that I’m promoting; I don’t necessarily have to talk them into anything – they are already on Google looking for what I’ve got. And all I need to do is figure out the keywords they use so I can use them to describe what I offer to connect with them.”

i. That I should define my perfect customer

This idea is so important to me because for the first time in the life of my business, I was able to define my ideal customer in concrete words and suddenly, I discovered I’ve been trying to reach all kinds of customers and the wrong prospects have been visiting my website.

Now, all my marketing effort is focused on a particular group of people. And this is something that’s helping me with my workers as well because I’m now able to tell them who our real targets are.

ii. That I should identify the keywords my potential customers are using to search for my product or service

This idea is important to me because using the tool the author recommended, I was able to dig up the keywords people used when searching for the kind of service I render online and by making changes to my website content based on my discovery, my site is now ranked 14th in Google and 4th on Yahoo! for that highly competitive keyword. And I was absolutely nowhere before; I was not even in the top 100 before. And this happened in a matter of two short weeks! It’s amazing. And I haven’t even started implementing it to AdWords itself yet, but Google’s organic search.

iii. That I should eliminate negative keywords from my ad groups and website

I actually implemented this on my website because I was getting visits from people who didn’t fit into my perfect customer profile. By so doing, the numbers of these “negative visits” have dropped sharply while the kinds of prospects I want are on a steady rise.

iv. That I should split-test my ads

Split-test is testing one ad against another to determine the one that’s performing better, then delete the underperforming ad and try to beat the performing ad with another ad.

I’m in the process of implementing it. It’s important to me because it is fundamental to the success of my business. In fact, I’ve included it in my marketing plan as a critical strategy.

v. That I should put my keywords in my ad headline, in the body, and in my URL

This idea is important to me because I did it to my website and it contributed to the high ranking my site received in search engines in a few short weeks.

vi. That I should triple my traffic with Google’s Display Network

This idea is important to me because it will help me increase my brand awareness. I’ve been wondering how to do it for a long time. This book opened my eyes to it.

vii. That I should “hone my chops” on a local test campaign before I go national

This idea is important to me because before I was thinking of going national the first time out. But now I know better that it could be a waste of money and even a disaster. I have also included this principle as part of my marketing core.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas will help me to conduct effective research on consumer behaviors, create ads and marketing messages that speak to the heart and soul of my target audience, then to test it and improve on it consistently. In so doing, I hope to grow my business and develop skills which I can later transfer to people and to other areas of life and to help non-governmental organizations succeed in their undertakings.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “There are many assumptions Google will make about how to set up your account that are wrong, and if you blindly follow its menus, you’ll make some costly mistakes.”

This quote is important to me because it’s a kind of wake up call to engage myself in critical thinking before taking any decision using any of Google’s tools. And not to blindly follow them because of their big name.

ii. “Think of the lengths to which we entrepreneurs, business owners, and salespeople go just to get a company off the ground, just to get a sale. I could recount in agonizing details the years of my life I spent pounding the pavement, making cold calls, renting trade show booths, going to no-show appointments, booking meetings that are total waste of time. But not anymore. I don’t go to them anymore; customers come to me. It’s been that way so long, I’m very much used to it now. They’ll come to you, too.”

This quote is so important to me because it provides a proof for me that the unusual marketing dream and vision I have for my business is possible, after all.

iii. “One of the huge advantages of AdWords is that it links you with people who are already “sold” on the concept that you are promoting. You don’t have to talk them into anything – they are already on Google looking for what you’ve got. You just need to figure out the keywords they use to describe what you offer, so you can connect with them.”

This is Important to me because it gives me a powerful reason to leverage Google AdWords.

iv. “Every keyword is theoretically a different market, which means that each major one will need a bid price of its own.”

This quote is important to me because it shapes my thinking and will help me to be precise in my adverts.

v. “It is almost impossible to guess what is going to make people click; you need to let the visitors vote. So, write a second ad you think can beat it, and go back into your ad group to post it.”

This helps me to eliminate guesswork in my marketing campaigns and allow the marketplace to decide what’s working and what’s not.

vi. “The number-one mistake people make is hastily organized campaigns.”

This has helped me in my last two non-Google AdWords campaigns. I wanted to rush it, but when I remember this quote, I took my time and was better for it.

vii. “It used to be that the more keyword you could find, the better. Not so anymore. The most recession-proof AdWords advertisers carefully choose the one hill in their market worth dying on and build their business around it.”

This quote will help me to stay focused instead of scatter-shooting in a market that is merciless on those who make even the minutest mistake.

viii. “The ads that bring in record-high numbers of clicks are never the most flashy, the most outlandish, the most brilliantly composed copy you’ll find. Never. They’re simply a function of saying the right thing at the right time to the right people.”

It’s important to me because it’s based on fundamentals.

ix. “You’re a smart Google advertiser when you know your numbers: how much each click is worth, what you can afford to spend to get a customer… tracking clicks to sales is not optional, by the way – it’s mandatory if you want to get all the profit that’s available to you. In a competitive market it’s the only way to survive.”

This quote is important to me because I’ve been running away from knowing my figures – which I know is crucial to my business success. This “preaching” on it motivated me to pay someone to handle this critical area of my business.

x. “People are drawn to you when you’re relevant. The formula for success on Google is relevance. When you’re relevant, Google will explicitly reward you for it, your costs will drop, and your profits will grow.”

This quote inspires me not to try to game the system as others do but to focus on doing what’s right and wait patiently for my reward.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6 . Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

There were no exercises to complete.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

Made to Stick
Assessment by Edwin Joel Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that some ideas survive and stick because they have the following elements: simplicity, unexpectedness, concreteness, credibility, emotions, and stories, while ideas that die don’t have these elements.

i. That I should find the core of my idea and communicate it first.

While reading this book, I read it with a business mindset and I kept an eye out for things I could implement immediately in my business and the communication projects I am working on and “finding the core” turned out to be the most important principle I discovered in this book because it enabled me to strip my communications off the fluff and find the core. And another thing was for me not to wait till the middle or the end to communicate my core, that it should be the first thing I convey.

I find it very powerful because, online, people don’t give you much attention – in fact, those who do give as “much” as 3 seconds, so I realize I don’t have the luxury of time. So, what I did was to overhaul the sales copy on my website and lead with the core of my message right in the headline and the paragraph introduction. Here’s how I put it: “Send bulk sms exactly when you want to all networks in Nigeria starting from just N1 or your money back!” That’s my core.

ii. That to make my ideas stick, I should tap into what already exists in the memory of my audience.

This is a breakthrough idea for me because it saved me a lot of time and words. I mean, I don’t have to belabor myself anymore to explain what I do or to sell my ideas. For instance, in my profile, instead of staying I’m an infopreneur, motivational speaker, author, and all that, I simply say, “Edwin is Nigeria’s Brian Tracy.” That does a better job of telling people what I do.

Another example is trying to explain to my prospects how sending online bulk text message works. Instead of going all academic or technical on them, I now say, “Sending online text message is like sending email” then I draw parallels from there. Great idea!

iii. That I should use generative analogies to communicate my ideas in a sticky way

According to the authors, generative analogies are metaphors that don’t merely shed light on a concept, but actually become platforms for novel thinking. For example, the metaphor of the brain as a computer has been central to insights generated by cognitive psychologists during the past fifty years. Another example is Disney who calls its employees “cast members” and customers “Guests.”

This idea is very important to me because it led me to call my own employees “family” and customers “friends.” And here’s how it now affects me: Whenever I want to take a critical decision concerning my customers, I simply ask, “How would I handle this if it were my friend?” For instance, in marketing to them, I don’t do mass marketing, I take the pains and time to do personalized marketing and call them by name because I figured out that if I were to sell to my friends, I’ll call them by name.

Because of this simple shift in thinking, I’ve created many loyal customers. I used it also in my Church where I lead the youths; I call them soldiers – soldiers of Christ, that is. And that is what we’ve been using as basis to reach critical decisions. For examples, when I call up people for a prayer vigil even in a moment’s notice, there are no excuses; most of my “soldiers” always show up.

iv. That to engage my students in a new topic, I should start by highlighting some things they already know

As a teacher, speaker, and writer I always have a tough time explaining new concepts to my students. For instance, recently I was trying to explain neuro linguistic programming to a client, I got stuck.

To find a breakthrough, I started by highlighting what he already knows: playing music from a CD. I explained to him that it’s just like overwriting a music CD with another song, so that when one pushes the play button, a new music plays instead of the old one. He understood it immediately and we rolled from then on.

v. That I should use props to make people’s thoughts focused

This idea is important to me because I seemed to have forgotten about props in effective communication. The examples the author gave opened my eyes to the power of this concept.

I have not actually used it recently because I intentionally shelved some speaking engagements, so I can’t give a personal example here. But I’ve noted it and will use it in the days ahead, not only physically when I’m communicating but I also hope to use it in my writings.

vi. That I should serve big established clients to inspire credibility

This idea is important to me because I’ve been battling with credibility problem in my business. When customers ask, “Why should we choose you?” the answer I usually give them is unsatisfactory, even to me. This idea gave me an easy way out. For instance, if I serve the Lagos state government, when customers ask me why they should use my services, I’ll simply give them my standard answer and add that I serve the Lagos state government. They’ll think that if I could serve the Lagos state government, then I can serve anyone.

vii. Appeal to people’s self-interest

I learned about this principle in copywriting but I paid little attention to it. But with the examples the author gave I realized how effective it is. So, I now lead my persuasive communications with it. For instance, I recently ran a marketing campaign where I led with this self-interest appeal: “Become nationally known.”

Results of my tests showed that the message with the self-interest appeal generated more response than the message without it.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

I’ve seen relationships collapse and die because two individuals didn’t know how to communicate what’s most important to them, what’s on their mind in a way that gets through. So, these ideas are going to help me to shape my communication so that I can communicate what’s most important effectively and teach others to do so in an effective way as well. I believe this will eliminate unnecessary bad blood and misunderstandings generated by ineffective communication. This will go a long way to creating a better world.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

i. “If you have to tell someone the same thing ten times, the idea probably wasn’t very well designed.”

It shifted my thinking from the need to repeat things to communicating effectively the first time out because I don’t have the luxury of speaking to the same people again in the same atmosphere.

ii. “To strip an idea down to its core, we must be masters of exclusion. We must relentlessly prioritize.”

It compelled me to do away with stuffs I thought was necessary to my communication and to focus on the most important.

iii. “The Curse of Knowledge: Once we know something, we find it hard to imagine what it was like not to know it.”

It helps me to put myself in my prospects shoe whenever I want to convey something. That way, I communicate in simple terms, instead of falling to the urge to impress.

iv. “If you want to spread your ideas to other people, you should work within the confines of the rules that have allowed other ideas to succeed over-time. You want to invent new ideas, not new rules.”

This quote is important to me because it reminds me not to reinvent the wheel but to leverage on time-honored principles of communication.

v. “If you say three things, you don’t say anything.”

Powerful quote, it helped me to come up with an effective catchphrase for my business. I was saying two things before, now I’ve reduced it to just one thing that matters to my audience.

vi. “The more we reduce the amount of information in an idea, the stickier it will be.”

It inspired me to reduce the amount of information in my website sales copy.

vii. “Nordstrom is a department store known for outstanding customer service. That extra service comes at a price: Nordstrom can be an expensive place to shop. Yet many people are willing to pay higher prices precisely because Nordstrom makes shopping so much pleasant.”

It gives me a picture of the kind of business I want to build.

viii. “When Boeing prepared to launch the design of the 727 passenger plane in the 1960s, its managers set a goal that was deliberately concrete: The 727 must seat 131 passengers, fly nonstop from Miami to New York, and land on Runway 4-22 at La Guardia. (The 4-22 runway was chosen for its length – less than a mile, which was much too short for any of the existing passenger jets).”

This quote is very important to me because it provides me with a benchmark for goal-setting – very concrete and specific.

ix. “When people think analytically, they are less likely to think emotionally.”

An important idea because it teaches me to communicate in a way that people think emotionally, because it is when people think emotionally that they are more likely to take action.

x.“Belief count for a lot, but belief isn’t enough. For people to take action, they have to care. As an example, most teenagers believe that cigarette smoking is dangerous. There’s no credibility problem with that message. Yet teenagers still take up smoking.”

Helps me to understand that it’s not enough to make people believe in my ideas, that it is not enough to be credible, that I also need to make people care about my ideas in order to act.

xi. “The most basic way to make people care is to form an association between something they don’t yet care about and something they do care about.”

Provides me with a simple way to make people care. I’d have found it difficult to do.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

No.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

Yes, there were exercises and I completed them. It helped me to better understand the ideas the authors convey.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

A. How interesting was it to read? 9
B. How helpful were the contents? 9
C. How easy was it to understand? 9
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 9

In Search for Meaning
Assessment by Edwin Joel (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that we cannot control what happens to us but we can control how we respond and cope by finding the meaning inherent in it.

i. That I should promise myself firmly that I will not descend into self-destructive habits when I face crisis in life

The author wrote that on his first evening in camp, he promised himself firmly that he would not “run into the wire.” This was a phrase used in camp to describe the popular method of suicide – touching the electrically charged barbed-wire fence. This idea is important to me because when I was faced with trials recently and was in a terrible emotional state, I thought of many bad things including dying. “After all,” I thought, “All my good has not been appreciated. So what’s the point of going on?”

By merely promising myself that I will face my trial with courage and dignity, I stopped thinking about hitting back and started doing all I can to uphold my promise and integrity.

ii. That I should let fate take its course

This idea is important to me because I have been troubling myself trying to be the “master of my fate” as the poet famously put it. I try to be the complete director of my fate; I try to understand some deep things of life that will not necessarily change my situation. I discovered that in so doing, I’ve been setting myself up for failure and anguish and that I was not 100 percent responsible for my fate and that there are no certainties in life. By taking this idea to heart and acting on it, I’ve had a considerable peace of mind.

iii. That I should NOT aim at success for the sake of it

This is how the author puts it, “Don’t aim at success – the more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it. For success, like happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue, and it only does so as the unintended side-effect of one’s dedication to a cause greater than oneself or as the by-product of one’s surrender to a person other than oneself. Happiness must happen, and the same holds for success: you have to let it happen by not caring about.”

This idea is important to me because it gave me some food for thought. It changed my mindset radically. And I thought about the lesson of nature: how plants when planted grow effortlessly; all we need to do is clear the weed and water it when required for it to grow as it should. This idea helps me not to “fight it”, but to allow success happen by pursuing a course greater than myself. In this wise, I have decided to do something that will outlive me, I’ve decide to write and publish a daily devotional and write books that will touch people’s lives in great ways.

iv. That I should learn to laugh about my problems no matter how miserable I might think it to be

The author recounts, “Most of us were overcome by a grim sense of humor. We know that we had nothing to lose except our so ridiculously naked lives. When the showers started to run, we all tried very hard to make fun, both about ourselves and about each other. After all, real water did flow from the sprays!”

When I read this, I was deeply touched that in that condition, people could still create humor. Then it dawned on me that the saying, we can decide to be happy anytime we want, is true, after all. It’s not really so much about what happens to us as it is how we respond.

I read this at a time when I was on the brink of a nervous breakdown. And because I was around people, I felt it was customary to be sober and look depressed after going through what I went through. But after reading this, I thought, “Heck… bitterness, anger, hate, guilt are not the only emotions available for me to feel. More so, I’m in control of my emotions, so I might as well dust myself up, laugh, crack jokes as I used to do before, and be courageous. After all, the feelings of dejection and depression weren’t helping me.”

v. That I should make a fundamental change in my attitude and perspective that it doesn’t really matter what we expect from life, but rather what life expects from us

This idea really changed my perspective and attitude greatly. It shifted my focus away from what life can do for me to what I can do for life.

As the author observed, life is making demands from me every hour every moment — both in little and great ways. And it is what I do in these moments that will ultimately shape my destiny. Now, when I’m faced with moments that want me to do something that will add to people’s quality of life, I think about this idea and go right ahead to give it my all.

vi. That I should do all the good I can even when I’m hurting

Like I’ve said, I got to a point in my life where everything seemed to be falling apart. At that point, I swore to look after myself and myself alone. I didn’t care about what happened to others even if it was in power to help them. But then came this idea. The author writes: “We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”

I was touched very deeply. And I dusted myself up, and with a frail body and little strength still left in me, resumed my role as a Change Agent. And I’m not looking back.

vii. That I should trust in the potential goodness of people

Sincerely, with what happened to me – the betrayal I faced in my most cherished relationship, the jealousy of friends, the selfishness of people who only remembered me when they needed my help, the lack of unwillingness of anyone to seek understanding of what I was going through – I lost complete faith in humanity.

But again, what the author recounts compelled me to do a U-turn. He related, “I remember how one day a foreman secretly gave me a piece of bread which he must have saved from his breakfast ration. It was far more than the small piece of bread which moved me to tears at that time. It was the human “something” which this man also gave to me – the word and look which accompanied the gift.”

I realized that, maybe, there are still a few good men and women out there.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

This idea will help me to see life as it is – that there are no certainties, that things far beyond my control can happen to me. These ideas will help me to do all the good I can wherever I am whenever the opportunity presents itself. These ideas will help me to choose the right attitude and take courageous and noble actions in all circumstances. In so doing, I will provide one more proof that, indeed, everything could be taken from a man but his freedom to choose how he responds. Hopefully, this will help create a better world by stopping people from committing suicide or engaging in some destructive habits when in the storms of life but rather choose to face it with courage and dignity.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“Life holds a potential meaning under any condition even the most miserable ones.”

This helped me to look for the ultimate meaning in my circumstances.

“I would like to mention a few surprises on how much we could endure… for instance, a light sleeper, who used to be disturbed by the slightest noise in the next room, now found himself lying pressed against a comrade who snored loudly a few inches away from his ear and yet slept quite soundly through the noise.”

This quote is important to me because it reinforces my believe that we can alter our states in any condition and determine how things will affect us not necessarily when we are in situations similar to concentration camps but when we want to do something but don’t feel like doing them.

“For the first time in my life I saw the truth as it is set into song by so many poets, proclaimed as the final wisdom by so many thinkers. The truth – that love is the ultimate and the highest goal to which a man can aspire.”

It’s an important quote to me because it got me thinking. It helped me to eliminate the anger and bitterness I felt from the betrayal of a friend.

“I practically trained a friend of mine who worked to me on the site to develop a sense of humor. I suggested to him to that we would promise each other to invent at least one amusing story daily, about some incident that could happen one day after our liberation.”

It inspires me and offers a possibility of the good things I can do even in the most miserable condition.

“In Auschwitz I had laid down a rule for myself which provided to be a good one and which most of my comrades later followed. I generally answered all kinds of questions truthfully. But I was silent about anything that was not expressly asked for. If I were asked my age, I gave it. If asked about my profession, I said “doctor,” but did not elaborate.”

This quote provides proof for me that one need not fear anything when one is living his life based on natural principles.

“There is only one thing I dread: not to be worthy of my sufferings.”

This is a quote by Dostoevski quoted by the author and worthy of mentioning. It helped me to consider myself privileged to suffer what I’m suffering.

“Martyrs whose behavior in camp, whose suffering and death bore witness to the fact that the last inner freedom cannot be lost. It can be said that they were worthy of their sufferings; the way they bore their suffering was a genuine inner achievement. It is this spiritual freedom – which cannot be taken away – that makes life meaningful and purposeful.”

This quote gave me a powerful new way to think: That the way I bear my suffering can be an achievement.

“Suffering is an ineradicable part of life, even as fate and death. Without suffering and death human life cannot be complete.”

I say touché to this because even the bible says it. This quote is going to help me absorb whatever shock the future has in store for me.

“The prisoner who had lost faith in the future – his future – was doomed. With his loss of belief in the future, he also lost his spiritual hold; he let himself decline and became subject to mental and physical decay.”

This quote got my attention because during my grief I miraculously started thinking about my personal vision. And during the process of creating one and working towards it I notice that I became genuinely happy and look forward to the future with hope.

“Those who know how close the connection is between the state of mind of a man – his courage and hope, or lack of them – and the state of immunity of his body will understand that the sudden loss of hope and courage can have a deadly effect. The ultimate cause of my friend’s death was that the expected liberation did not come and he was severely disappointed. This suddenly lowered his body’s resistance against the latent typhus infection. His faith in the future and his will to live had become paralyzed and his body fell victim to illness.”

This serves as a reminder for me to choose positive emotions over negative emotions since they affect my immunity. And I don’t want to die because I lost hope, I want to die for something, I hope to die courageously.

“We needed to stop asking about the meaning of life, and instead to think of ourselves as those who were being questioned by life – daily and hourly. Our answer must consist, not in talk and meditation, but in right action and in right conduct. Life ultimately means taking responsibility to find the right answer to its problems and to fulfill the tasks which it constantly sets for each individual.”

This quote changed my perspective about life and I received the encouragement to live right.

“Someone looks down in each of us in difficult hours – a friend, a wife, somebody alive or dead, or a God – and he would not expect us to disappoint him. He would hope to find us suffering proudly – not miserably – knowing how to die.”

This quote gives me several pictures of people looking at me, begging me not to disappoint them, begging to me to rise up and be the good role model that I am.

“The crowning experience of all, for the homecoming man, is the wonderful feeling that, after all he has suffered, there is nothing he need fear any more – except his God.”

This quote reminds me that “what doesn’t kill me makes me stronger” – which is one of the purposes I go through the fiery trial in the first place.

“In some way, suffering ceases to be suffering at the moment it finds a meaning, such as the meaning of a sacrifice.”

I love the use of words and the commonsense therein. And it compels me even more to look for the meaning of what I’m going through so that I don’t see it as suffering anymore.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

No.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

No.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

A. How interesting was it to read? 8
B. How helpful were the contents? 8
C. How easy was it to understand? 9
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 7

Fire in the Soul
Assessment By Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that there are times in life when we go through pain, she says this is normal and designed to purify us.

i. That what if…?

This is about the greatest idea for me in this book, because it forced me to ask myself questions that helped turn the pain I was going through on its head.

Some of the questions the author asked in the “what if game” are: What if those things that seem unfair turn out to make sense? What if pain is also an act of service? What if we find our freedom through struggling with darkness?

I see the truth in the above questions, because during those times I was in pain, people very close to me lost their dear ones in quick succession and I was vested with the difficult task of comforting them in their grief. It was very easy for tears to flow from my cheeks as I reached deed down into their souls to feel how they were feeling. It was a great learning experience for me. Then I realized that the emotional pains I went through was an act of service, after all.

ii. That I should make a point of paying close attention to my physical needs such as proper breathing, exercise, dieting, and sleeping well.

This idea is important to me because it served as a gentle reminder to things I need to develop as habits. According to the author, physical needs such as proper breathing, exercise, proper dieting and sleeping will often go down the drain during hard times, adding physical stress to mental stress and creating a vicious cycle.

I find this to be true. It was as if the author was speaking to me. So, to make changes I had to be conscious of my breathing and sleeping patterns and asked a footballer friend of mine if I could join their club so that I can be exercising with them.

iii. That I should make time during the day to be alone – not to read or watch TV – but to be quiet

This has been the most difficult thing for me to do. I’m not worried about watching TV because I’ve trained myself to do away with TV, but I’m addicted to books. I don’t feel well if I don’t read books at least twice a day.

What this idea did to me was make me to be conscious of it. As a result, I occasionally take breaks to be alone and do nothing. Not surprisingly, it’s helped me increase my alertness level and I easily pour out my mind effectively through writing. It also helped me to sleep and eat well unlike before.

iv. That I should put the serenity prayer into action: “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.”

Like many of the ideas in this book, this also served as a reminder to me to not just memorize the above prayer but to implement it.

This came at a time I was at my lowest ebb psychologically and spiritually because of what happened to me in my relationship. And it made me to categorize the things I couldn’t change and accept them, and to categorize the things I could change and work on changing them especially my attitudes and emotions.

v. That if an enemy or a person with whom I have a problem comes to mind, that I should always shift my whole mood by blessing them instead of staying stuck in anger or feelings of victimization.

I read this at time I was still feeling the pangs of the betrayal of a friend, of a loved one. I was consumed with rage, anger, and disappointment.

These emotions were affecting me really bad – it was affecting my health, my relationship with other people, and my relationship with God. Blessing them was not an easy thing for me to do, but I did try and gradually things begin to change for the better for me.

vi. That I should find a beautiful setting to walk in if I can, that any place will do, even a small room will suffice.

This idea is important to me because occasionally at dawn I used to take a walk to meditate, to ponder on many things, to pray. I didn’t see it as very important. But by reading it from a person such as this author, it made me see it in a new light, as beneficial. And since then, I’ve increased the frequency of doing it.

vii. That I am not 100 percent responsible for creating my own reality

Before coming across this idea, I’d been thinking that I was 100 percent responsible for what befell me in my relationship, I was angry with myself, very angry. But I gained freedom when I came across this idea. According to the author, “While we certainly participate in creating the events of our lives, the idea that we are 100 percent responsible for creating our own reality is a psychologically and spiritually impoverished notion.”

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

This idea will change my mindset; in fact, it has affected my mental models for good. In my daily personal life it will help me to reframe my beliefs, to look at the brighter side of situations especially the ones human beings habitually see as bad. It will help me create a better world in that it will help me be at peace with people who offend me and also with myself. That way, the vicious cycle of hate and violence will be broken and replaced with love and tolerance.

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“It is most often from suffering that kindles love, loss that deepens understanding, hurt that opens the eyes of the heart that see forgiveness as a way of life, and peace of mind as our birthright.”

This quote helps me to see that there are some things I now understand more deeply as a result of the emotional pains I went through.

“Pessimism compromises immune function, makes it difficult to learn from our experiences and leaves us depressed and powerless.”

It makes me to be aware of the danger I was posing to myself as a result of my pessimism and to make a positive change.

“If we are willing to give up our stories of fear and gaze with new eyes into the face of love, perhaps someday we will find a new meaning in our suffering and, as Kahlil Gibran promises in The Prophet, “come to bless the darkness as we have blessed the light.””

This powerful quotation that helps me to see darkness is just as good as light. Heck, it’s God that created darkness – both literally and metaphorically – in the first place, and He must have a purpose behind it.

“Knowing who will be on the other end of a ringing telephone, an impulse to turn around in your car because you sense that someone in another car is staring at you and precognitive dreams are common experiences that challenge the localization of mind to the brain and suggest that it might instead extend through space.”

This quote helped to reinforce my belief that we are spiritual beings with intuitive abilities, that I am intuitive because I used to experience the things the author observed above.

“We cannot hurt any living thing without hurting ourselves, nor can we nurture anything or anyone without also nurturing ourselves.”

The first part of this quote gave me consolation that those who are hurting me will also feel hurt. The second part inspired my confidence that my good works is not in vain, that I will be rewarded ultimately.

“Your own Higher Self and your guides – teachers and comforting presences in the nonphysical realm who accompany you throughout life (some people think of these beings as guardian angels) – are always trying to get your attention. Many people who have near-death experiences meet these guides when they are out of their bodies and subsequently maintain a conscious communication with them. But whether you are conscious of them or not, they are always trying to communicate with you.”

This quote makes me to tune in to hearing from my guardian angels.

“All the help I need is available to me. I can receive it by asking.”

It helps me to be hopeful, optimistic, confident, seeking, and prayerful when there seems to be no way and when I face an uphill task to accomplish.

“The power to love and serve grows through pain. I can offer healing to others as I heal myself.”

This helps me to see my suffering as necessary and as a service.

“Forgiveness means coming to some understanding of why abusive people abuse – it is usually out of their own pain and abuse – and coming to some closure that sets one free from the hatred that gives the abuser continuing power.”

I just love the definition and description of forgiveness and a new understanding I now have of it. It actually helped me to forgive someone that hurt me really bad.

“A wound with meaning is much easier to heal than a wound that is meaningless or that, worse, is interpreted as divine punishment or other evidence of personal unworthiness.”

True! It helped me to find meaning in my pains.

“If a boy wrestled you to the sidewalk and made off with your wallet, you would probably be angry at first, and your anger might serve you well. Perhaps it would warn you not to walk alone in certain parts of the city or encourage you to take a course in self-defense. If your anger turned to empathy it might lead you to join a big-brother or big-sister program or to champion the disadvantaged. But if you held onto your anger it would eventually turn into a liability. Perhaps it would ferment into prejudice, an attitude of victimization or a desire for revenge. These attitudes would erode your peace of mind and weaken you physically and emotionally.”

An important quote because it shows that there are different ways I can respond to the same situation.

“In his translation and commentary on The Upanishads, Swame Paramananda says this verse: “He who perceives the Self everywhere never shrinks from anything, because through his higher consciousness he feels united with all life. When a man sees God in all beings and all beings in God, and also God dwelling in his own Soul, how can he hate any living thing? Grief and delusion rest upon a belief in diversity, which leads to competition and all forms of selfishness. With the realization of oneness, the sense of diversity vanishes and all the cause of misery is removed.”

This is a revolutionary quote I intend to build my entire life on and to help others to do the same. So help me God.

“Technically, meditation is intentional concentration on a selected focus.”

Powerful definition! I have never seen it elsewhere. It encapsulates what meditation is really all about.

“Meditation is a habit. In order to form most habits, you need to repeat a behavior until it becomes second nature. Choosing a consistent time of day for meditation and making a commitment to do it daily is the easiest way to get started and to keep going. It is best to practice for a minimum of twenty minutes.”

Before now, I didn’t see it as a habit. Now I do, even more, as a way of life. It helps me to meditate consistently and a particular time.

Young Dutch Jew Etty Hillesum. After she perished in Auschwitz in her late twenties, her diaries were found and published as An Interrupted Life: The Diaries of Etty Hillesum 1941 – 1943. On September 23, 1943, she wrote in a letter to her friend Klass: All I really wanted to say is this; we have so much work to do on ourselves that we shouldn’t even be thinking of hating our so-called enemies. We are hurtful enough to one another as it is… and I repeat with the same old passion, although I am gradually beginning to think that I am being tiresome, “It is the only thing we can do, Klass, I see no alternative, each of us must turn inwards and destroy in himself all that he thinks he ought to destroy in others. And remember that every atom of hate we add to this world makes it still more inhospitable.”

It shifted my focus from seeing the fault of others and focused on working on myself. I made me see myself as a hypocrite and to first remove the plank from my eyes so that I can see to remove the speck from others’ eyes.

xvi. “If you don’t seem to be getting what you asked for, despite doing your part to make it happen, perhaps you are getting what you need.”

I value this quote because it provided me with good food for thought.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

No.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

No.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

A. How interesting was it to read? 6
B. How helpful were the contents? 7
C. How easy was it to understand? 8
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 7

Meeting Excellence
Assessment By Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that there are better ways and immutable principles that if applied will help leaders hold excellent meetings that get results.

A. That I should always ask, “Is this meeting necessary? Is there a clear purpose for this meeting?”

This idea is important because I facilitate a fixed monthly meeting in my Church and there are times that some meetings are just plain unnecessary – at times, there will no concrete thing to talk about except pass information which could be done via text message. So, this idea gives me the courage to not hold such meetings and save ourselves of some valuable time.

B. That I should communicate with the key players in the meeting to know if they are ready.

This idea is so important to me because several times during many meetings I’ve led, I get angry because those vested with the responsibility to make a presentation or report on an unfinished business usually aren’t ready or come prepared or left the job half-done and even undone.

These usually happen because I don’t always check on them before the meeting. I usually expect them to be dedicated to the work as much as I the leader am dedicated. Now I know better to ask, “Is your presentation ready? Are you aware of the likely questions about the issue? Are you prepared to handle the questions?”

C. That I should establish ground rules.

This is a super-idea that brought order to the hitherto sometime-rowdy meetings I used to lead. There are usually some things that happen during a meeting that I don’t like; things like making and receiving calls, pressing the phone for purposes not related to the meeting, leaving the meeting without any permission, two people talking at the same time, distracting side talks, and so on.

This idea gave me a way to handle those undesired mannerisms. I had everyone sign the ground rules if they were to be part of the meeting.

D. That I should distribute the meeting notice and agenda prior to the meeting.

This is one of the greatest ideas I got from this book because it’s commonsense. I discovered that most of the things we used to discuss in our meetings require deep meditation, reflections, consulting, and prayers in order to generate the needed ideas and to reach the right decision.

But most team members usually get to know about the issues during the meeting… and deep meditation can’t be done during the meeting. That’s why at times I get blank stares from members. Now, I’m wiser, I instruct the secretary to send agenda and expected outcomes to every member so they can come prepared with their contributions. And the good news is that this single strategic move dramatically cut down the amount of time we spent in meetings.

E. That my scribe should take notes rather than minutes.

Before now we used to take minutes that include many irrelevant details and take an inordinate amount of time to read at next meeting. According to the authors, notes has come to mean a record of the meeting highlights. While minutes include a detailed report on everything that took place during the meeting, notes present a summary of the key meeting outcomes and action items.

In addition, the meeting notes the authors propose include a table that presents the status of the team’s action items which also include the What, Who, When. I so much value this idea because it saves time and at the same time empowers people responsible for getting things done to get them done.

F. That I should have a timekeeper

The role of the timekeeper will be to help the team stay on track by making everyone aware of time. The timekeeper knows the time allocated for each agenda item and will let the leader or facilitator (and the presenter, if any) know when the limit is about to be reached on an item.

This idea is so important to me because we usually spend an inordinate amount of time doing meetings so much so that members were reluctant to attend meetings because of the long time we usually spend. As a meeting facilitator, I usually double as the timekeeper, but I usually fail at it because of the many demands of leadership. I’m convinced that having someone else keep time will help me finish meetings on set time.

In fact, I now start meetings by announcing the objectives and the TIME we’ll finish the meeting.

G. That I should give out a “Five-Minute Meeting Evaluation” to collect feedback on the effectiveness of my team meeting and identify ways to improve in the next meeting.

I’m habitually in love with evaluation and feedbacks but I never thought of applying it to meetings. What a great idea! It helps me to fine-tune our meetings to ensure excellence.

Part of this idea is to set aside a time for it on the meeting agenda and ensure everyone have a copy before the meeting. I’m implementing this immediately.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas will help me fine-tune and streamline the meetings I lead in my business and in my Church. It will help me to focus on the important things, lead excellent meetings, and achieve the results I set out to achieve in the first place. These ideas have empowered me with the knowledge and wisdom to train others in holding excellent meetings in order to help create a better world.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“If the purpose of the meeting is to communicate information such as status updates, it may be more efficient and just as effective to use an appropriate electronic method. Consider sending e-mail with an attachment or posting the information on the team space. If the purpose of the meeting involves only two or three members, perhaps an informal subgroup session would be a better alternative. If the purpose involves information gathering from some members, one-to-one meetings or telephone conversations with these individuals may be a preferred method.”

This quote is important to me because it helps me to know what to do based on the purpose of a meeting.

“Provide a beginning and ending time for the meeting. The starting time is not enough, as members need to know when the meeting will end so they can plan the remainder of their day.”

This quote is going to help me to stay on point and not to digress as I usually do sometimes in meetings.

“Always list agenda items in order of their importance. The first item is the most important and is usually associated with the key meeting outcome. The obvious rationale for rank order by importance is that it ensures that the most important items get considered, get considered when the energy of the members is highest, and, if necessary, get additional time to fully explore the issue.”

Wow! What a great quote. It opened my eyes to the missing link in the meetings I facilitate. Many times, I’ve arbitrarily ranked a key item lower on the agenda and we don’t get to discuss it because of time factor and I always feel guilty. Now, I know that prioritization can and should also be applied to meeting agenda.

“Be specific. The topics selected for the agenda should be as specific as possible. For example, rather than “Update on B-47,” it is more helpful to say “Determine the next steps of the B-47 marketing plan.” In addition to specificity, all agenda items should be stated in terms of an outcome or objective. In other words: What do we need to accomplish to satisfactorily complete the agenda item?”

Wow! Wow! Wow! What a powerful frame! It gives me and my team what to really focus on as far as the items on the agenda are concerned.

“Estimate the time necessary to complete each item. As a planning tool, this will help determine if the number of agenda items is appropriate for time set aside for the meeting. The result may be a need to revise the agenda or the length of the meeting. It is clearly an estimate of the time. During the meeting it gives the meeting facilitator some options. For example, as you approach the end of the time allocated to an agenda item, the facilitator can ask the team if they wish to continue, move the item to the next meeting, or ask a subgroup to handle it. Each of the options has consequences, but the question places the decision in the hands of the members.”

Helps me to be conscious of time spent on each item and to estimate how long a meeting will take so that I can inform my team members at the start of the meeting.

“Someone—either a member or a guest—should own each agenda item. It is the responsible person’s role to prepare and provide the materials, present the information, answer questions, and be a resource. Sometimes the issue owner also facilitates the discussion. One benchmark of a successful meeting is the sharing of responsibility for meeting effectiveness.”

I see this quote helping my team members to be committed to our cause.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

No.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

No.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

Deep Change
Assessment By Edwin Joel Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that one person can change the larger system or organization in which he or she exists.

i. That to bring about deep change in others, I must first reinvent myself.

This idea is important to me because it made me to sit back and assess myself whether I have all it takes to bring about the transformation I dream about in the organizations in which I exist. It led to an important discovery that I lacked some of the core skills, habits, and character needed to see my dream to the end.

For instance, I realized I needed to sharpen my public speaking and writing skills and also to develop spiritual warfare skills.

ii. That I should break the logic of task pursuit.

This idea is important to me because it made me to be really and fully aware of the mistakes I made in the past and why things didn’t work out in my key relationship, health, and finance.

It made me to be aware of the pattern in me that pursue tasks once my goals are set and will never stop to “sharpen the axe” or reevaluate whether the tasks are still worth pursuing in the face of new and emerging realities.

iii. That I should reexamine and enlarge my perspective.

This idea is another self-discovery idea. I discover that I usually fall prey to the human tendency to stick to one point of view – once I take a stance on something, it’s almost impossible to see it the other way round. For instance, I recently got into a serious debate with by alliance partners and freelancers about the best Content Management System (CMS) online to use for a certain project. The more we argued, the more I saw that we were being biased.

During the meeting, I remembered this idea and I decided to reexamine my perspective. I went online for an intense research, and shockingly, I discovered this tendency in others, too. But after my research, I discovered that the wisdom lies in knowing WHEN to use a particular CMS. While my colleagues can only use one CMS, I can use both well and I know when to use which – and even developing a checklist for it – something they don’t have or know.

iv. That I should “build the bridge as I walk on it.

The author observed that when we have a vision, it does not necessarily mean that we have a plan. We may know where we want to be, but we will seldom know the actual steps we must take to get there. We must trust in ourselves to learn the way, to build the bridge as we walk on it.

This idea means a lot to me because I often worry about the resources and how to achieve my vision so much so that I’m paralyzed to get started. This idea has deeply affected my thinking pattern for now and for good – to always get started with the faith that the provision for my vision will show up, to build the bridge as I walk on it.

v. That I should confront the tyranny of competence by encouraging teamwork

Teamwork is a value I have yet to really build into my consciousness. This idea not only serves as a reminder but as a motivation to subordinate individual competence and technical ability to teamwork in my business and in organizations which I lead. For instance, in my business I have deliberately swap job functions in order to build a cross-functional team.

vi. That I should confront the “undiscussable.”

This idea is important to me because it gave me the courage to confront and address a very important issue that’s been affecting everyone in one of my organizations. And that is the issue of time allocated to our weekly meeting. The time is always overshot because the head of the team, in making closing remarks, often speak for too long without regard for time.

We always lament the case in private with no one courageous enough to mention it in our meetings. After encountering this idea, I approached the team head and discussed the issue with him and we were able to reach a consensus on the agreed time. He also gave me the green light to reorganize and systemize things.

vii. That I should subject my vision to reality check by asking: “Who’s willing to die for this vision?”

I’m always in love with soul-searching and breakthrough questions. This is one of them. It’s so important to me because I’ve been creating visions for different areas of my life, business, relationships, and organizations, but I’ve never subject it to this reality check.

Now, before I go live with any vision, I’ll first ask myself if I’m ready to die for the vision even before asking others. And if I ask those who will be working to achieve the vision and they say they can’t die for it, then I will scrap the vision and recreate it in a way that people are willing to die for it.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas will help me to reinvent myself first before embarking on helping people change, to question every point of view I’ve cling tightly to, and take everything one step at a time towards the accomplishment of my vision. And by encouraging teamwork, I hope to tap into the collective power of the group to help create a better world.

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“Deep change differs from incremental change in that it requires new ways of thinking and behaving. It is change that is major in scope, discontinuous with the past and generally irreversible. The deep change effort distorts existing patterns of action and involves taking risks. Deep change means surrendering control.”

An important quote because it defines what deep change is all about, its scope, and power. It kind of paints a picture for me about what deep change is really about. The definition also makes deep change compelling and attractive for me.

“In today’s organizations, many people are dying, not physically, but psychologically.”

This quote got me scrambling for ways to make the work in my business psychologically challenging and fulfilling for my employees and team members.

“Making deep change in ourselves is not something we do for ourselves. It is the choice to be alive.”

The quote adds further motivation for me to seek deep change.

“We are so into the sense of defeated and frustrated self that we do not recognize that our best self is not the old self but a new self that is slowly emerging.”

This quote empowered me to stop looking mournfully at the past and to start welcoming and rejoicing in my new self that is emerging after the heartbreak I recently went through.

“Most of us have very high expectations of our leaders, and are easily and quickly disillusioned by their failure to meet our expectations. We seldom, however, hold the same expectations for ourselves.”

Touché! Got me thinking about my personal leadership and the need to hold myself to high standards.

“People seek solutions to new problems in the same places where they found the old ones.”

I nodded my head in agreement when I read this and started asking myself how I am practicing this now. What I discovered shock me and I started looking for solutions elsewhere.

“In pursuing a task, we naturally follow our existing paradigms, scripts, or frameworks. These maps are the key to our past success. The problem is that when we experience success, we change, and so does the world. A map we have used in the past might be of limited value in new territory. In a new situation, we cling to our old map, we might become deeply frustrated. At such times, we often become trapped in the logic of task pursuit.”

What an observation! It helped me to be aware that what made me successful in the past won’t necessarily make me successful now or in the future, that I should constantly reevaluate my old and existing maps.

“For most of us, under pressure, the pursuit of task drives out any thought of maintenance. Our individual drive toward task completion thwarts the need for routine maintenance.”

I see this in the light of my health and it’s helping me to do routine maintenance, to develop it as a habit because it’s so difficult to break. I always want to work, work, work.

“Enlarging our perspective is very difficult. For one thing, the degree to which past successes have etched a given map, script, paradigm, or myth into our brain affects how we process information. They are extremely formidable barriers to tear down and replace.”

This quote helps me to take the process of enlarging my viewpoint very serious and to persist since it is not easy to do.

“When one discovers what is right and begins to pursue it, the necessary people and resources tend to turn up.”

This quote helps me to reinforce my belief on this. And I recently experienced this in my business when someone turned up “out of nowhere” and promised to help me use his influence to raise finance to grow my business.

“The fact that we have enough trust and belief in ourselves to pursue our vision is what signals to others that the vision is worth investing in. Our message is filled with integrity and good intentions. However, it is usually our actions, not our words, that send the message.”

This quote adds to my strategy to do less talk, more action.

“Our educational systems and our career experiences in organizations naturally socialize us to the technical and transactional paradigms. The strategies of these paradigms are reinforced in nearly all our interactions.”

Another quote that creates awareness for me and helps me to know when and how I’m being scripted and to resist scripts and paradigms that are adversarial, solely technical, and transactional.

“I define a team as an enthusiastic set of competent people who have clearly defined roles , associated in a common activity, working cohesively in trusting relationships, and exercising personal discipline and making individual sacrifices for the good of the team.”

This definition makes me to look at the teams I belong to and the ones I lead and ask, “Are we really a team?” and use the above definition as a barometer.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

No.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

Yes. There were so engaging and transforming.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

In Search of Excellence
Assessment By Edwin Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the authors convey is that the secret of successful companies is staying very close to their customers to satisfy their changing needs.

i. That I should stay close to my customer – learn her preferences and cater for her.

This idea is important to me because I’ve been erroneously thinking that when starting a business that I should hire a customer service manager to interface between the business and our customers. But now, I’ve learned a lot and made many critical decisions that have shaped the destiny of my business simply because I decided to be the customer service manager from the beginning.

My customers have told me many things, opened my eyes to so many crucial things that no customer service manager would have seen the way I see them or even communicate them to me. I’ve since hired a customer care rep, but I have him log everything the customer say or request so that we can learn her preferences and cater for her.

ii. That I should empower my employees to think independently and competitively.

When I bring new a team member on board, he or she always sees me as the founder, as the “alpha and omega” when it comes to thinking. This idea has helped me to include thinking independently and offering ideas as part of my expectations of them and also as part of their job profile.

And just recently, my customer service manager supplied me with three great ideas that I wouldn’t have thought of myself. We implemented the ideas immediately and we are seeing positive results. His ideas bordered on time allocated for work and how we communicate with our customers, and how and when we should make special offers to our customers.

iii. That I should be value-driven in my business.

This idea has helped me to make very critical decisions in my business. For instance, I’ve had offers from people who want to use my business platform for scam. They usually come with their tempting “bloody” money, but ideas like this one reinforced my belief that the last men standing in business will be those who are honest and value-driven.

In other areas, I’ve refused to market to my customers on a mass basis, instead we take the pain to send marketing messages to our customers one by one and addressing them in their own names. These are just a few ways I’ve applied this idea. Recently, a customer called to commend us for addressing him by name in our messages.

iv. That I should focus on the core of my business and not dabble into businesses I don’t know.

As a business founder, I’m always tempted to try that business opportunity and that new money-making venture. But the way the author highlights and trashed it empowered me to stay focused on the core of my business. And that if I want to diversify, I should stick very close to my knitting.

As a result of sticking to our knitting and doing one thing and doing it excellently well, my company has set a standard in the industry so much so that we’re being clearly copied by as much as seven other businesses in the industry!

v. That I should see my employees as a source of ideas and not just a pair of hands.

This idea is important to me because I realized that the society has scripted me to see my employees as a pair of hands. This idea helped me to rescript myself and to tell my workers so. This idea helped to reinforce the way I see my workers – as family members and not just a pair of hands. This metaphor of seeing my employees as family members alone has created an amazing atmosphere in my business that has become some sort of a competitive advantage.

vi. That I should keep my staff simple and lean.

Because of what I learned in project management, I designed a staff form that is large for the kind of business I do. I’d thought that by so doing it will help ensure that things are get done and done excellently. But this idea has helped me to reevaluate that paradigm and see that it is not necessarily true.

As a result, I’ve streamlined my organizational chart, eliminate some administrative layers, and created a lean team of staff obsessed with service and excellence. And did I say that my team members are surprising me with things I thought they couldn’t do well?

vii. That I should prefer to do something – anything – rather than sending a question through cycles and cycles of analyses.

The underlying assumption here is that it is better to do something than wait for perfect condition before acting. It is also that of testing and experimentations. I find this idea very useful recently when my team and I needed to decide whether to register one of our products, buy a new business tool, or invest in marketing with the limited resource we have.

Some of them said they will think it through. And they were not forthcoming on time. So as the leader I decided to do something – anything, to test, to experiment, and not wait for perfect conditions. And it turned out to be the best decision at that time.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas will help me to establish core values not just in business but in any venture I’m engaged in and to be service and excellent oriented. These ideas will help change my fundamental operational paradigms that have been responsible for my lack of results. And in creating a business based on these ideas, ideals, values, and principles, I hope to create a platform that will become a case study and an inspiration to people. I believe this will help create a better world.

4. Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“Another friend described for us why, in a recent major computer system purchase for a hospital, he chose International Business Machines. Many of the others were ahead of IBM in technological wizardry,” he noted. “And heaven knows their software is easier to use. But IBM alone took the trouble to get to know us. They interviewed extensively up and won the line. They talked our language, no mumbo jumbo on computer innards. Their price was fully twenty-five percent higher. But they provided unparalled guarantees of reliability and service. They even went so far as to arrange a backup connection with a local steel company in case our system crashed. Their presentations were to the point. Everything about them shacked of assurance and success. Our decision, even with severe budget pressure, was really easy.”

This quote provides proof for me that having a better product don’t necessary matter, that what really matters is understanding customers, treating them well like all human beings deserve, and going out of my way to serve them.

“An excellent example is McDonald’s. As successful as that corporation was in the United States, doing well abroad meant more than creating an international division. In the case of McDonald’s it meant, among other things, teaching the German public what a hamburger is.”

When I read this statement, an idea came to my mind to educate my customers about my products and services.

“We desperately needs meaning in our lives and will sacrifice a great deal to institutions that will provide meaning for us. We simultaneously need independence, to feel as though we are in charge of our destinies, and to have the ability to stick out.”

This quote provides me with a way to motivate my workers and to create a meaning for my business, to turn my business into a cause that people are willing to sacrifice their time and talent for.

“TI and Tupperware insist that teams set their own objectives.”

This quote gave me another idea based on principle to empower my workers to set their own goals as a way of motivating them.

“The systems in the excellent companies are not only designed to produce lots of winners; they are constructed to celebrate the winning once it occurs. Their systems make extraordinary use of non-monetary incentives. They are full of hoopla.”

I have yet to have this kind of system in my business. So, this quote puts the idea in my mind to create such a system as soon as possible.

“Both Warren Bennis in The Temporary Society and Alvin Toffler in Future Shock identified the need for the adhocracy as a way of corporate life. In rapidly changing times, bureaucracy is not enough. By “the bureaucracy,” they mean the formal organization structure that has been established to deal with the routine, day-in, day-out items of business – sales, manufacturing, and so on. By “the adhocracy,” they mean organizational mechanism that deal with all the new issues that either fall between bureaucratic cracks or span so many levels in bureaucracy that it is not clear who should do what; consequently, nobody does anything.”

An eye-opening quote that establishes for me the need to have an adhoc team in place in my business and in other organizations I lead to plug the leaks in our systems created by changes in reality.

“He [Joe Girard] doesn’t think statistically, but emphasizes that he has sold “one at a time, face-to-face, belly-to-belly.” “They are not an interruption or pain in the neck. They are my bread and butter.”

As business people we have been programmed to think in numbers and statistics and to categorize customers and treat every customer much the same way, but this quote pick holes in such a way of thinking. And I’m thinking that if this mentality and way of selling to customers made Joe Girard the world’s greatest salesman then I’m going to deploy it fully in my business.

“I was at a meeting of sales managers with Mr. Watson [Senior] one time,” says Gordon Smith, recently retired from Memorex. “The purpose was to assess some customer problems. On the front table there were eight or ten piles of papers, identifying the source of problems: ‘manufacturing problems,’ ‘engineering problems,’ and the like. After much discussion, Mr. Watson, a big man, walked slowly to the front of the room and, with a flash of his hand, swept the table clean and sent papers flying all over the room. He said, ‘There aren’t any categories of problems here. There’s just one problem. Some of us aren’t paying attention to our customers.’ He turned crisply on his heel and walked out, leaving twenty fellows wondering whether or not they still had jobs.”

I like it. It shows me how to dramatize to my workers the need to treat customers individually.

“Getting the order is the easiest step; after-sales service is what counts.”

This quote reinforces my mentality of following up on customers after they’ve bought and to make it a pervasive culture in my business.

“IBM backs its close-to-the-customer beliefs with intensive training. Basic sales training is fifteen months: 70 percent of the time is spent in the branch, and 30 percent in university-like settings. Advanced training follows like clockwork. For example, more than 1,000 people per year go through the President’s Class. It is conducted by eight Harvard professors and six IBM professors, and its purpose is to “teach people how customer presidents think.” Roughly another 1,000 salesmen go through a financial officers think. It is part of a program that adds up to an estimated 15 days spent on formal training for everyone, every year, regardless of seniority.”

Wow! This quote inspires me to take all my workers through series of intensive, comprehensive, and rigorous trainings before I allow them anywhere near my customer.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

No.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

No.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

The Autobiography of Martin Luther King, Jr.
Assessment By Edwin Joel Akpan (Nigeria)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea the author conveys is that one can overcome violence with nonviolence, hate with love.

i. That I should resist evil as a moral obligation

This idea is important to me because I’m the kind of person that would rather bite my tongue and keep a sealed lip in the face of evil or when things aren’t going right rather than speak out against it and resist it. The words of Martin Luther King, Jr seems to stir my soul like it did the Negroes of yester years to fight for their freedom and the freedom of generations yet unborn.

As a result, I’m setting up a blog to bring people’s awareness to the things that are not going right in my world and to speak eloquently on ways to mitigate these evils.

ii. That I should beware of the false idealism of only believing in man’s potential for good and not his potential for evil.

What an illuminating insight this idea is for me. In the past, I’d unrealistically and profoundly believed only in man’s potential goodness and not also in his potential badness. As a result, when I was betrayed in most trusting relationship, it was just too hard for me to bear. It was as if the whole world had fallen on me.

Now, I’m wiser and this idea makes me to see my relationships in a whole new light. Now, I temper my trust in people with cautious pessimism and stand guard lest I be taken advantage of unnecessarily.

iii. That I should give my life to something eternal and absolute

This idea is important to me because recently I’ve been thinking about all the works I’ve been doing in my life, all my daily activities whether they are really worth my time, energy, and effort. I’ve been thinking and reflecting on what I should be focusing on daily to live a fulfilled life. On stumbling on this idea, I knew that I’ve found the core criterion to make the decision on what to focus on daily. This idea became a kind of filter for me to screen what I should be doing daily.

For instance, in taking on new activities, I ask, “Is this going to have an eternal implication?” If it doesn’t, I simply shelf it. If it does, I joyfully and totally immerse myself in doing it.

iv. That I need to create the opportunity to develop myself.

I particularly like the logic and the way he framed it, “When I hear, people aren’t ready,” that’s like telling a person trying to swim, “Don’t jump in that water until you learn how to swim.” When actually you will never learn how to swim until you get in the water. People have to have an opportunity to develop themselves.”

I see this in the light of starting my own family. People have said, “Hey Edwin, you aren’t ready and all sorts things.” And I kind of saw it that way and soft-pedaled. But this logical reasoning has rekindled the desire and plan to start my own family and not wait till every condition is perfect.

v. That my ultimate aim in conflict resolution must be the creation of a beloved community.

As I write this I’m faced with three personal conflicts with people, this idea changed my approach radically. I had wanted to choose the warpath since my peaceful entreaties were yielding practically no positive result.

And I must say that in applying this philosophy to one the conflicts I’m facing, I ended up winning a friend instead of becoming a lifelong enemy with him. And that happened with one of my competitors.

And I’m delighted to add reconciliation to my conflict-resolution system. As the author puts it, “There is another element that must be present in our struggle that then makes our resistance and nonviolence truly meaningful, that element is reconciliation.”

vi. That in bringing about quantum change, I should concentrate on a single and district facet of it at a time instead of scattering my efforts in a general attack.

In the words of the author, “If I had to do it again, I would guide the community’s Negro leadership differently than I did. The mistake I made there was to protest against segregation generally rather than against a single and district facet of it. Our protest was so vague that we got nothing, and the people were left very depressed and in despair. It would have been much better to have concentrated upon integrating the buses or the lunch counters. One victory of this kind would have been symbolic, would have galvanized support and boosted morale. But I don’t mean that our work in Albany ended in failure. And what we learned from our mistakes in Albany helped our later campaigns in other cities to be more effective. We never scattered our efforts in general attack of segregation, but focused upon specific, symbolic objectives.”

This powerful idea has helped me to streamline my plan for a revolution in the community of Christians that I belong. I’d wanted to take on the problem generally. But I now see how it won’t work. This also reminds me of the military principle of “quick victories” which I strongly believe in.

vii. That the means I use must be as pure as the ends I seek.

I constantly find myself in personal conflict of choosing between a pure means and a bad means to achieve a good objective. And it always take my time when I reflect on the right choice to make. Either way, I sometimes feel guilty even when I accomplish my objectives.

But this idea forces me to think that if I think and look hard enough I’ll find a moral means to get the moral end I seek. No more guilt trips.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so how?

These ideas will help me to make better decisions quickly as it pertains to what I give my life to doing. Every day I will choose activities to do based on the positive consequences they will have in eternity. These ideas will help me devote my time to writing books and creating resources that will make a lasting impact in people’s lives, that will outlive e when I’m gone from this life, that will help make the world a better place for us all.

4. Quote: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“Noncooperation with evil is as much a moral obligation as is cooperation with good.”

This inspires me to speak up and do something about evil systems in my community.

“Any religion that professes concern for the souls of men and is not equally concerned about the slums that damn them, the economic conditions that strangle them, and the social conditions that cripple them is a spiritually moribund religion only waiting for the day to be buried.”

I belong to a body of Christ that separates its concerns for the soul of men from its concern for their socioeconomic wellbeing. This statement gives me food for thought.

“Our concern would not be to put the bus company out of business, but to put justice to business.”

This quote really helped me to separate my basic motive in making a public statement against someone who infringed on my copyrights.

“What we were really doing was withdrawing our cooperation from an evil system, rather than merely withdrawing our support from the bus company. The bus company, being an external expression of the system will naturally suffer, but the basic aim was to refuse to cooperate with evil. From this moment on I conceived of our movement as an act of massive noncooperation. From then on I rarely use the word “boycott.”

I marvel at the author’s depth of thinking and his masterful use of words to communicate the core his message and what the struggle was really about. I’m inspired.

“Despite this success, so profoundly had the spirit of the protest become part of the people’s lives that sometimes they even preferred to walk when a ride was available. The act of walking, for many, had become of symbolic importance. Once a pool driver stopped beside an elderly woman who was trudging along with obvious difficulty.
“Jump in, Grandmother,” he said. “You don’t need to walk.”

She waved him on. “I’m not walking for myself.” She explained. “I’m walking for my children and my grandchildren.” And she continued toward home on foot.””

It reinforces my belief that people are ready to sacrifice their comfort, time, and resources if a cause is right and worth pursuing.

“There are those who would try to make of this a hate campaign. This is not war between the white and the Negro but a conflict between justice and injustice.”

Another masterful use of words to clearly convey what the movement was about and to shift people’s attention back to the real, fundamental issue.

“Don’t ever let anyone pull you so low as to hate them. We must use the weapon of love. We must have compassion and understanding for those who hate us.”
I need to frame this and put it on my wall because right now I’m facing hate from some people and I really need to put this philosophy of love for hate into practice.

“Meanwhile I reconsidered. How can I serve as one of the leaders of a nonviolent movement and at the same time use weapons of violence for my personal protection? Coretta and I talked the matter over for several days and finally agreed that arms were no solution. We decided then to get rid of the weapon we owned. We tried to satisfy our friends by having floodlights mounted around the house, and hiring unarmed watchmen around the clock. I also promised that I would not travel around the city alone.”

I like this statement because it was a courageous decision and it empowers me a great deal not to resort to armed protection when I’m working for God and under attack. I also loved “the third alternative” where he did something to satisfy his worried friends and extended family.

“At the jail, an almost holiday atmosphere prevailed. People had rushed down to get arrested. No one had been frightened. No one had tried to evade arrest. Many Negroes had gone voluntarily to the sheriff’s office to see if their names were on the list, and were even disappointed when they were not. A once fear-ridden people had been transformed. Those who had previously trembled before the law were now proud to be arrested for the cause of freedom.”

Another inspirational happening that reinforces my belief that nothing can stop an idea whose time has come.

“I have always felt that ultimately along the way of life an individual must stand up and be counted and be willing to face the consequences whatever they are. And if he is filled with fear he cannot do it. My great prayer is always for God to save me from the paralysis of crippling fear, because I think when a person lives with the fears of the consequences for his personal life he can never do anything in terms of lifting the whole of humanity and solving many of the social problems which we confront in every age and every generation.”

Helps eliminate the fear I’ve been having in bringing about many social changes in my community.

“We have seen truth crucified and goodness buried, but we have kept going with the conviction that truth crushed to earth will rise again.”

A profound truth to add to the way I think.

“One of the prayers that I prayed to God everyday was: “Oh God, help me to see myself in my true perspective. Help me, O God, to see that I’m just a symbol of a movement. Help me to see that I’m the victim of what the Germans call a Zeitgeist and that something was getting ready to happen in history. And that a boycott would have taken place in Montgomery, Alabama, if I had never come to Alabama. Help me to realize that I’m where I am because of the forces of history and because of the fifty thousand Negroes of Alabama who will never get their names in the papers and in the headlines. O God, help me to see that where I stand today, I stand because others helped me to stand there and because the forces of history projected me there.”

This quote helps me to see myself in much the same light as the author saw himself and it provides me with a prayer point as well. Plus, his humility inspires me.

“We will have to repent in this generation not merely for the hateful words and actions of the bad people but for the appalling silence of the good people.”

When I read that, I decided, “It’s time to repent and speak up, Edwin!”

“Human progress never rolls in on wheels of inevitability; it comes through the tireless efforts of men willing to be co-workers with God, and without this hard work, time itself becomes an ally of the forces of social stagnation. We must use time creatively, in the knowledge that time is always ripe to do right.”

I’ve erroneously been sitting back and say, “God will fight His battle in my church.” But this quote makes me think, “What if I’m the soldier God wants to use?”

“At one school, the principal gave orders to lock the gates to keep the students in. The youngsters climbed over the gates and ran toward freedom.”

It tells me what can happen when there is a cause to die for.

“A social movement that only moves people is merely a revolt. A movement that changes both people and institutions is a revolution.”

Helps me to rescript my strategic objectives as per a social change project I want to launch.

“We are 10 percent of the population of this nation and it would be foolish for me to stand up and tell you we are going to get our freedom by ourselves. There’s going to be a coalition of conscience and we aren’t going to be free here in Mississippi and anywhere in the United States until there is a committed empathy on the part of the white man of this country.”

Teaches me that to bring about a lasting change in a community I should seek to involve all parties.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

No.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them useful?

No.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions?

No.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.