Ann Perez Omenye – Assessments – International Institute for Global Leadership

As a Man Thinketh
Assessment by Ann Perez (Kenya)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

As a man thinks so he is. We are makers of ourselves. The outer conditions of a person’s life will always be harmoniously related to his inner state. Our thoughts and feelings shape and create who we are. We cannot think one thing on the inside about ourselves and be another on the outside. What is on the inside is automatically manifested on the outside. The author is trying to let us, the reader, realize that we create ourselves. Who we are today is a product of ourselves. It starts on the inside.

2. What were the seven ideas which were personally most important to you and why? List these seven ideas followed by an explanation after each one as to why it was important to you. Use personal examples from your own life.

i. Circumstance does not make the man, it reveals him to himself.

This particular idea made me realize that the “circumstances” I am in today reveal my thoughts in the last couple of years. I find myself in a position in my career and my life as whole that I ideally would not want to be in but I have worked myself into this position. “Circumstances grow out of thought” I truly cannot blame anyone for where or who I am today but myself….my thoughts. As the author so very well puts it “Men imagine that thought can be kept secret but it cannot. It rapidly crystalizes into habit and habit into circumstance-“– I got into the habit of settling for second best. Always thinking I could not do better. And so I created a circumstance that is not the ideal for me, not where I want to be but rather where my thoughts led me to.

ii. A man only begins to be a man when he ceases to whine and revile and commences to search for the hidden justice which regulates his life.

He ceases to accuse others as the cause of his condition- and this is where I am today. I have ceased to blame others for my conditions and am taking responsibility for myself. I have ceased to whine and have begun the search by joining the leadership institute and getting involved in activities and with people who will help propel me to where I want and need to be.

iii. There is neither progress nor achievement without sacrifice.

Everything we do in life is about sacrifice. The journey to where I want to be will require a lot of sacrifice from me and dedication. Basically the author reinforces to me that nothing comes easy.

iv. Your vision is the promise of what you shall be one day; your ideal is the prophesy of what you at last unveil.

I have a vision which now is a promise that one day shall come to pass helping me achieve the ideal that I am now prophesying. This I will one day unveil when my vision is fulfilled through a progressive consistent thought pattern. I create my vision and through my thoughts (by what I prophesy) will eventually unveil my ideal. I learn that I cannot have my ideal drop from heaven somewhere. I progress towards it.

v. Only the wise man, only he, whose thoughts are controlled and purified, makes the winds and the storms of the soul obey him.

Only when we are able to control our feelings can we truly master ourselves. Only then can we truly deal with the issues that surround us and everyday challenges. The challenges do not change us but rather we take charge of the challenges. I am on a journey to learn how to not let my emotions and thoughts master me. I am slowly learning the art of self -control, staying calm under all circumstances.

vi. One man is an oppressor because many are slaves – let us despise the slave.

I have always had an opinion about oppressors of whatever nature; the dictator, the mean boss, the bully etc. not realizing that those oppressed actually cause their own oppression- (read slavery) if they did not allow it then there would be no oppressor. I am one of those who has often believed in fighting for the oppressed. I now see this issue in a totally new light. We do not need to fight the oppressor but rather educate the “slave” to take up his position which he himself creates through his thinking. If he thinks as a slave he remains one. If he decides to change his thinking he stops being a slave and changes his circumstance.

vii. Calmness of mind is one of the beautiful jewels of wisdom.

It is the result of long and patient effort in self-control. Its presence is an indication of ripened experience, and of a more than ordinary knowledge of the laws and operations of thought. The idea of truly mastering what this book talks about is one I am interested in exploring.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so, how?

I now understand that we create our own circumstances and we can change these circumstances. How I am today, and how the world is today is as a result of what I have created, I and others in the world. I realize that I have often blamed people for my “circumstances” and the misfortune/calamities in the world, the injustices, when it really is in my power to change this. It will take a lot of sacrifice and I must have a vision of this better world. It will involve getting people to understand that everything around them is really under their control. They decide what they want. We must control our thoughts to create a better world. I now learn about vision and the key role it has in my life. With a vision I can then see my thoughts come into fulfillment. My vision is the promise I will now hold on to and work progressively towards it.

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“A man’s mind may be likened to a garden, which may be intelligently cultivated or allowed to run wild; but whether cultivated or neglected, it must, and will, bring forth. If no useful seeds are put into it, then an abundance of useless weed seeds will fall therein, and will continue to produce their kind.”

Truly summarizes this book for me- as a man thinketh so he is. What I think just like a garden is what I produce. If I seek excellence then I have to truly plant that in my garden or else I will actually harvest nothing. I cannot expect to be any better if I continue to feed my mind with the same old ideas producing the same crop. I feed my brain with great ideas, new thoughts and harvest a new crop.

“A man is literally what he thinks, his character being the complete sum of all his thoughts.”

Who I am today, I created. My character is reflective of my thoughts and I become what I choose. If I think negative thoughts then my character slowly develops into a persona that I may not necessarily like yet I create. I learn that to be a better me it begins with what I think, my thoughts. I decide who “me” becomes.

“They who have no central purpose in their life fall an easy prey to petty worries, fears, troubles, and self-pitying, all of which are indications of weakness, which lead, just as surely as deliberately planned sins (though by a different route), to failure, unhappiness, and loss, for weakness cannot persist in a power evolving universe.”- My purpose in life is important. Without a purpose I am truly headed nowhere. I have often ended up pitying myself, worried, fearful all because I was all over the place. No real purpose. Once this purpose is defined I realize that despite the challenges I truly do see where am going. I am then at peace despite my surroundings.

“Men are anxious to improve their circumstances, but are unwilling to improve themselves.”

I have always wanted things better in my life but have never really stood up to change/improve myself to get to where I want to be. It takes action to improve myself. I have to make the effort. My circumstance only changes when I do.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

I am yet to truly grasp the meaning of the statement, “The dreamers are the saviors of the world. Composer, sculptor, painter, prophet, sage- these are the makers of the after-world, the architects of heaven” I would want to understand how the dreamers then become saviors. They dream agreed but how then do they turn these dreams to reality?

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them helpful?

Subscribe to the weekly e-meditation which I have done. The articles I have received so far are very enlightening.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions? If so, please comment

The idea of truly mastering what this book talks about is what I am interested in exploring. A good read that needs to also provide the practicality of putting what it talks about into practice. How does one learn to control his thinking? How do we control our thoughts?

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

A. How interesting was it to read? 10
B. How helpful were the contents? 10
C. How easy was it to understand? 9
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 10

Jonathan Livingston Seagull
Assessment by Ann Perez (Kenya)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The main idea that the author is trying to covey in this book, in my view, is that “we can lift ourselves out of ignorance, we can find ourselves as creatures of excellence and intelligence and skill.” We can be what we truly want to be if we are able to rise above other people’s opinions of what is right or what is considered “normal.” It is not an easy journey but we eventually do get there.

i. Boredom and fear and anger are the reasons that a gull’s life is so short and with these gone from his thought, he lived a long fine life indeed.

The writer is showing us that feelings that we may have of fear, anger and sometimes boredom do not add anything to our life. These negative emotions do not improve us but rather stagnate us. I have over the years learned that to have a full life I have to nurture positive energy from within. Negative energy, anger, sadness etc. is the cause of many of us having high blood pressure, strokes. To live a full life requires a positive attitude.

ii. We chase our next world through what we learn in this one. Learn nothing, and the next world is the same as this one, all the same limitations and lead weights to overcome.

Nothing will ever change if we ourselves do not change. If as we move on in life we do not develop and grow nothing will be different in the years to come. Time will move on and we will be left behind. We cannot hope for something better if we do not learn how to create the better now. This says a lot to me because I have always looked forward to something more than I am today. I wanted something better but was really not doing anything to achieve that. I never seemed to learn from past mistakes or try to develop or grow in preparation for the future. I was chasing the next world when I still have so much to learn so getting there (for example starting a new job) there really was no difference. Same issues, same challenges.

iii. We should never give up. Keep trying no matter what.

Even when Jonathan was not getting it right he kept at it. More often people give up when they are just about to get it. Faced with challenges we opt out instead of pressing on and persisting until it is done and done right. Personally I have, when faced with challenges thrown in the towel. There is a difference when we don’t give up because the more one pushes the higher the probability of it happening.

iv. We need not accept and be satisfied with the way things are. There is much more if only we seek it.

“Most gulls don’t bother to learn more than the simplest facts of flight – how to get from shore to food and back again” I look at my past and like the gulls I was content to accept things as they are. Having the attitude of maintaining the status quo. The fear of rocking the boat. We should dare to step out of our comfort zone

v. There is a price to pay to achieve anything.

Jonathan became an Outcast to achieve his dream. He had to sacrifice his place among the gulls to be who he wanted to be. I know that to achieve my dreams I will have to be ready to sacrifice something, give up something. Sometimes it’s even people that you value in your life; family, friends etc.

vi. Have a passion.

We must believe in something and want something in our life. We must have that one thing that drives us and gets us moving. That one thing that we may perhaps have to even die for. I realize now that life without passion could very well be meaningless. If we don’t have that thing that gets us stirred up, excited then we really do not have much.

vii. Soon, Jonathan had become to Fletcher, what Chiang was to him. He taught Fletcher how to go beyond limitations and to touch heaven.

Jonathan passed on knowledge. He became a teacher. He did not keep what he had learned to himself but rather shared it with Fletcher. We need not only be students but teachers as well. I am learning more and more how to share thoughts, ideas instead of just learning. Teaching calls us to action. We find out who we really are when we reach out to others.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so, how?

The ideas and lessons will go a long way in creating a better me which in turn will help to create a better world. Letting go of the negative emotions of boredom, anger will make me live a fuller life and create positive energy around myself and the people around me. I choose not to give up and press on with passion in my day to day life accepting that there is a price I have to pay to achieve my dreams. I am open to learning and this will allow me to learn about the people around me much better and accepting their differences. Like Jonathan taught Fletcher I want to do the same in my quest to create a better world. Whatever “Chiang” will teach me I will use to make the world a better place.

I will no longer accept things as they are. I realize there is more. When I step out from my comfort zone I will be working on making the world a better place not just for myself but for everyone else. People will realize that they can be so much more. Empowerment, acceptance and passion will transform the world. We should learn as we move forward and not carry the limitations and challenges before as we move forward. The way to a better world starts with me.

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“Your whole body, from wingtip to wingtip,” Jonathan would say, other times, “is nothing more than your thought itself, in a form you can see. Break the chains of your thought, and you break the chains of your body, too.”

When we begin to believe then we can. Our thoughts shape our actions, they determine who we are. My thoughts then will break the chains (my limitations) setting me free to be whoever/whatever I want to be

“The gull sees farthest who flies highest.”

We can only truly see/imagine/ reach as far as we dare to go or imagine. We determine how far we want to go by how far we are willing to go.

“Like everything else, Fletcher. Practice.”

Continuous practice is important to achieve excellence. It takes patience and effort to get to the top. You have to work at it.

“You don’t love hatred and evil, of course. You have to practice and see the real gull, the good in every one of them, and to help them see it in themselves. That’s what I mean by love.”

We have to look beyond our differences and see everyone as we see ourselves. We may not agree or understand why they behave/act or think the way they do but must see beyond that and love them just the same. I am learning how to accept people of all cultures, beliefs not pegging them against my own.

“It always works when you know what you are doing.”

A truly inspiring statement. There is no point trying to do something that you do not understand because it will not work

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

“Heaven is not a place, and it is not a time. Heaven is being perfect. And that isn’t flying a thousand miles an hour, or a million, or flying at the speed of light. Because any number is a limit and perfection doesn’t have limits. Perfect speed, my son, is being there.” Quite a provocative statement here that I would certainly want to dwell and delve into more to truly understand. Especially the idea of “Heaven is being perfect.” I do not understand this very well and again the idea of “perfection” here could do with some elaborating.

Another statement that I would love to further discuss to clearly understand “The gull who speaks to an Outcast is himself an Outcast.” Further insight into this would be great. I would have thought that one can speak to an Outcast and not be one himself? Does he believe and accept what the Outcast is? Sometimes it may be to convince the Outcast to come back to the “normal?”

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them helpful?

None.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions? If so, please comment.

I think it would have been nice to discuss the other sea gulls. Why they were the way they were, why they saw Jonathan as a rebel. In life I believe the majority fall into the category of those who accept things as they are. Not happy but not really questioning either and live like that all their lives. Only a few who Jonathan represents here are able to truly break their chains and truly fly, soar. I think it helps understand Jonathan better too when we take the position of the other sea gulls. What makes us satisfied with where we are, not willing to move out of our comfort zone?

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

A. How interesting was it to read? 7
B. How helpful were the contents? 8
C. How easy was it to understand? 7
D. Would you recommend it to others? 8
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 7

How to Win Friends and Influence People
(Assessment by Ann Perez Omenye (Kenya)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book.

The author is trying to help the reader master the principles of human relations. He shows the reader how to increase his ability to deal with people and influence their behaviour. He writes on how to live a fuller, happier and more fulfilling life through our relationships. He teaches on practical skills that the reader can employ in all aspects of his life.

A. Criticism is futile because it puts a person on the defensive and usually makes him strike to justify himself.

This statement describes me so well! Often I have been criticized and instinctively I have always gone on the defensive to defend and justify myself. Strange that we react this way and expect others to act differently when we criticize them. Criticism wounds and I intend to avoid it at all costs.

B. A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still

We cannot force people to think the way we do. A man has to be convinced and not only convinced because he is forced to or because he wants to please another. I cannot force my ideals, my thoughts down people’s throats but rather bring them to the point where they themselves are able on their own to view/see things as I do.

C. By fighting you never get enough, but by yielding you get more than you expected.

We have often been taught to fight for our rights, stop being a doormat, don’t let other people walk all over you- so the idea of yielding did get my attention. I guess this is important to me because in the recent past I have been busy fighting with someone and have not got anything out of it. My approach has been wrong and I am looking forward to putting this idea of yielding into practise!

D. If you want enemies, excel your friends, but if you want friends let your friends excel you.

A powerful idea indeed. More often than not we are quick to showcase our achievements not even realizing the effect it has on our friends. I intend, moving forward, to let my friends “shine.” Make them feel important.

E. If there is any one secret to success it lies in the ability to get the other person’s point of view and see things from that person’s angle as well as from your own

I have had a particularly hard time seeing things from other people’s perspective. I have kind of always “worn my own shoes” and “looked through my own lens” not making an effort to really see things the other person’s way. I realize we can look through both lenses. My view point may not necessarily be wrong but it may also not be entirely correct. The same applies to the other person’s view point. We have to be accommodative of one another; that is the secret to success.

F. Sometimes the lack of experience, not lack of ability can be the reason for failure.

So true! I have failed quite a few projects not because I lacked the ability but rather the experience. Experience provides a rich reference point. If you cannot have your own experiences then tap into the experience of others.

G. The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated.

So well said. I have craved appreciation all my life. The feeling that someone appreciates me is priceless. My shortfall however is while I crave appreciation I do not give it much verbally. It is so easy for me to write a text message, a note maybe to say thank you but somehow never look the person eyeball to eyeball and really let them know how I feel. I am working on this area and am motivated knowing I can make a difference in someone’s life.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so, how?

These lessons will help me in my daily personal life because they touch the very core of my being. The richness of my relationships is dependent on these lessons. My career, my success is all tied to these lessons too.

Creating a better world begins with how I relate to people and influence them. How I treat people will contribute in a big way to how they view themselves and in turn how they treat others. If we are able to give people what they need most one at a time and they in the same way do the same we will be able to create a better world where each one appreciates and respects the other because they realise that their view points are just as important as their own and may not necessarily be wrong just because it is different. With this we learn to embrace all cultures and all people.

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“I have no right to say or do anything that diminishes a man in his own eyes. What matters is not what I think of him, but what he thinks of himself. Hurting a man in his dignity is a crime.”
An extremely important quote for me. This will be a quote that I will continually repeat until it becomes a part of me. What I think of another person, his ideals, way of living etc. is my business. It is not in my place to say to him things that are contrary to how he thinks or views himself. We are always so quick to judge yet we don’t even know why the individual is the way he is. We make assumptions.

“Of all the sure- fire, infernal devices ever invented by the devils in hell, for destroying love, nagging is the deadliest. It never fails. Like the bite of the king cobra, it always destroys, always kills.”

A quote that makes me smile each time I read it. I used to nag. I used to nag a lot! Looking at it now years later I see why certain relationships I was in failed. Nagging destroys and so while I smile at this statement I am also saddened that I did not know it before. Moving forward however, I am glad that I am now better equipped to handle intimate relationships.

“All men have fears, but the brave put down their fears and go forward, sometimes to death, but always to victory.”

Even in fear, I will move forward. Sometimes I have insecurities, uncertainties but staying at one point will not help me. I need to be brave and move forward. I will still be a winner.

“When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity.”

This goes well with another quote, “A drop of honey catches more flies than a gallon of gall.”

I need to get a few more sweet words in my vocabulary! I should learn to be more sensitive to people’s feelings and not always be ready to tear them apart each time an opportunity arises. I may be right, have the ideas but that does not mean I have to prove a point each time I can. I intend to learn the art of wearing other people’s shoes and “buttering” them up too- sincerely- because they deserve it.

“There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.”

Growing up and now living where there is a clear distinction of good and evil (bad) this statement speaks volumes to me. This basically means that I am able to decide for myself what is good or bad for me. Things/Ideas are not cast in stone as good or bad.

“Calling attention to one’s mistakes indirectly works wonders with sensitive people who may resent bitterly any direct criticism.”

I am one of those sensitive people. I am still learning how to deal with being criticized and have been hurt lots of times when attacked.

“I shall pass this way but once; any good, therefore, that I can do or any kindness that I can show to any human being, let me do it now. Let me not defer nor neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.”

A quote that I have now also pasted on my mirror to remind me to show kindness and love whenever I can because sometimes that is the only chance I will ever have but also because the other person deserves it from me.

5. is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them helpful?

This book calls the reader to action. To daily put into practise the principles put forward. They are very helpful because now before I do or say something I make mental reference to the principles. This has certainly helped me in so many areas that I was struggling with in my relationships. I can confidently say it works but requires a lot of self -control! I am confident that with continued practise, all these will become a way of life for me.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions? If so, please comment.

None.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

A. How interesting was it to read? 10
B. How helpful were the contents? 10
C. How easy was it to understand? 10
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 10

Keys to Success
Assessment by Ann Perez Omenye (Kenya)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The author conveys a powerful message: “whatever your mind can conceive and believe, your mind can achieve.” He brings out the idea that you can achieve success in anything and everything you do. The author highlights the principles of success and how when these are consistently applied will ultimately result in success. He particularly brings out Definitiveness of Purpose which is the starting point of all achievement. Drifting through life without aim/purpose is the first cause of failure.

A. Definitiveness of Purpose develops self reliance, personal initiative, imagination, enthusiasm, self- discipline and concentrated effort.

This idea is very important to me because it explains to me exactly why I am where I am today. I have never had definitiveness of purpose hence can never truly be self reliant or have personal initiative. I wish to be successful but without this key ingredient I labour in vain. I am now on the road to define my definitiveness of purpose.

B. If you can see opportunity as quickly as you can see the faults of others, you will soon succeed.

I am one of those who can quickly point out what I do not like in others though most times inwardly (still the same thing!) and yet can whine how there are no opportunities and am stuck in a rut! How things will be different moving forward. Using the same technique of fault finding I intend to find the opportunities around me.

C. Successful people make decisions quickly (as soon as all the facts are available) and firmly.

I procrastinate. I have the fear of deciding. I can never be successful until this changes. My personal life has been at a standstill for almost 10 years now because I cannot decide obviously then impacting on my professional life. I am on the road to decision making. No more excuses.

D. The only thing which you have complete right of control at all times is your mental attitude.

I have to learn the art of controlling my mental attitude. This has been my downfall. Letting all sorts of ideas, attitudes creep in over the years has not built me up but rather slowly brought me to a standstill. I need to get my mental attitude under my control.

E. You must be able to fix your interest on any person, place or thing and hold it there for as long as the situation requires.

I give up quickly! I have never been able to hold my attention towards something, an idea, a person long enough to the end. I am practising this idea of “fixing my interest and holding it there.” I believe I can.

F. The Golden Rule; “treat others as you would like them to treat you.”

This is an idea I hold true in my day to day life. I only treat others as I would like them to treat me. I must admit though that it is pretty difficult but doable.

G. Trust yourself and you will always have someone to rely on.

I should always be able to trust myself. Self-doubt has haunted me for a long, long time. I am not good enough. Now I learn that when I trust “me” someone always has my back. Someone that I can always rely on and that someone is me.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so, how?

Whatever my mind can conceive and believe I can achieve sums it all up. These lessons clearly show that I can be whatever I want to be if I actually change the way I am currently doing things. I can be a success and unlike my previous thinking, success is really not about material things. Success starts with me. From the inside. My personal life, professional etc are all intertwined and none works without the other. Creating a better world? By creating a better me. A better me infused into the world begins to change the world. A successful me in the world becomes a magnet to others around me who then seek to find what I have found. If we could call it “osmosis” from a region of high concentration (me) to a region of low concentration (the world) through a semi-permeable membrane ( my attitude, behaviour, successes).

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“Any decision is better than none.”

I have often and still have extreme difficulty in making decisions especially those that affect me personally and professionally. I hold back making decisions and would rather someone else did and to my own detriment. I now realise that to be successful I have to bite the bullet. I have to be responsible for the decisions in my life. I cannot be neither here nor there. I have to decide. Any decision I make right or wrong is better than making none. I cannot move forward when I make no decision.

“Success Consciousness: your mind becomes sold on success and refuses to accept the possibility of failure.”

This is a statement that keeps coming at me. My mind has to be sold on success and refuse to accept the possibility of failure. Through life the fear of failure has made me step back from doing so much that I would have done. The “What if”, ” How will it turn out” questions have made me hesitant. I have not been success conscious.

“No one can be successful without first knowing what it is he/she wants. I do not know what I want. How then can I be successful.”

Napoleon Hill speaks right at me with this. I have to know what I want if I want to be successful. It cannot happen any other way.

“Learn to close the door of your mind on all failures from your past.”

I live in the past. I have to, actually I must close the door of my mind to all my failures in the past and not continually dwell on them. I am now beginning this process.

“There are only two kinds of problems- those you can solve and those you can’t.”

I learn through Napoleon’s book that I am not a miracle worker. I cannot solve everything. There are those problems that I can figure out and those that I need to let go of. I bear burdens that I do not necessarily have to deal with!

“When you are an accurate thinker, you are not the slave, of your emotions.”

I have and still am the slave to my emotions. They dictate how everything around me happens. I am on a mission to change this by being an accurate thinker. I often use the phrase; “I wear my heart on my sleeve.” I guess that is ok but whether on my sleeve or not I should be in control. What people should see is not a woman overwhelmed with emotion but rather a woman who feels but is in control

“Distance yourself from anyone or any circumstance that makes you feel inferior.”

I always let people walk over me; I feel like a doormat; I feel small yet smile and take it all in my stride. So yes, I now know I need to distance myself from such individuals and relationships.

“Constant display of defeatism is a visible expression of selfishness and lack of self discipline.”

I have been selfish. Forever whining how things are going wrong, how people have been unfair. I had no idea that this constant display of defeatism or victim mentality is selfishness and show that I lack discipline! I now know better. I am seeing my weaknesses now. Weaknesses that I could not recognise before.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them helpful?

Plenty of ideas and exercises to put into practise on a day to day basis. Some will span over a couple of weeks to truly see them bear fruit. I’m working on them all a day at a time. Very helpful exercises bringing insight into so many areas of my life that I took for granted or neglected. Providing reinforcement to those that I was already aware of.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions? If so, please comment.

None

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

Psycho-Cybernetics
Assessment by Ann Perez Omenye (Kenya)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The author brings out the concept of “self-image”- the mental picture that each person has of himself/herself. Until our beliefs are changed our behaviour will continue to be the same. The author talks about how self image is changed for better or worse, not by intellect alone, nor by intellectual knowledge alone, but by “experiencing”. The book is all about “self-image” psychology.

A. The self image is a “premise,” a base, a foundation upon which your entire personality, your behaviour and even circumstances are built.

This idea basically means that the image I have of myself has been the foundation of all that I am today- it has made me who I am. My perception of me dictates how I think and act. I have not had a very good self – image and so does explain exactly why I am in the current circumstance that I now face.

B. To really “live” that is to find life reasonably satisfying, you must have an adequate and realistic self-image that you can live with.

You must find yourself acceptable to “you.” I am not happy with who and what I am today. My self-image is not satisfying to me and thus I am not really living. I feel inadequate and have often put the blame on everything else other than myself. This book clearly points out that to have a full life I must have an adequate self-image, a realistic one that is acceptable to me. I have started on the exercises in the book and slowly working on my self-image.

C. There is no such thing such as a “superiority complex.”

I have described people I associate with as having a “superiority complex” In the not so recent past I let someone who clearly in my opinion then displayed a superiority complex that always left me feeling inferior and basically useless. I know realise that this individual is someone who is probably dealing with feelings of insecurity and may even be worse off than I am. I also again realise that had I had an adequate self image then his superiority complex would not bother me at all. This is all so much learning for me.

D. Decide what you want- not what you don’t want.

I usually concentrate on those things that I don’t want to happen. Wishing that they do not happen. This clearly should not be the case. My mind needs to focus on what I do want. My thoughts should be centred on what I want to happen. It’s all about keeping my eyes on the ball and keeping my thoughts positive. Truly a tall order for me but an area am determined to change.

E. Don’t try to live in tomorrow or in the past.

And that is me. I never live in the now. Hardly ever! I am always worried about what tomorrow will bring and what happened yesterday. I have to learn to live in the now. Appreciating today and letting tomorrow take care of itself. Each day I am getting better at this because I now know it is the only way to truly live. A day at a time.

F. Happiness is simply a “state of mind.”

A powerful idea. All my life I have been searching for happiness. Someone, something to make me happy. I was seeking/looking for something that only I could give me. Happiness begins in my mind. It is a state of mind that I decide to have. It is not determined or influenced by anything except my mind. I am in charge of my happiness! And now I wonder why I am always sad!

G. It doesn’t matter who’s right but what’s right.

An idea that leads me to do a lot of soul searching. I have always thrived on being right not really looking at what is right. What is the right thing to do and not who will be right as a result. It truly does not matter who is right does it? Too many people get hurt when we try to avoid what is right by being right.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so, how?

This is a book that has to change my life giving it a total overhaul. The ideas and thoughts that it brings forth move the very foundation of my whole being. How I see myself clearly has to change now that I have learned these valuable lessons. My reaction to my environment is distorted because of how I view myself. If I am to change anything it has to begin with me. Everything and how I would like it to be is dependent on the image that my mind holds of me. I have to forgive myself too because without this I can never move forward no matter what. My new positive attitude that I am working on will mean nothing unless my emotional scars are dealt with.

To create a better world, I am creating a better me. I am not able to create anything better than what or who I perceive myself to be. The book brings it out so well when the author says “if our ideas and mental images concerning ourselves are distorted or unrealistic, then our reaction to our environment will likewise be inappropriate”. I am therefore not able to create a better world with my current image of me. I am seeing myself in a new role and this is propelling me to change. When I am done with me then I am able to also impart the same new found knowledge to another who seeks to find himself/herself like I do. And once again the ripple effect comes into play.

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“You will act like the sort of person you conceive yourself to be.

A statement that causes my hair to stand. I now see me in how I act. I often wondered why I am so uncertain about so many things, indecisive, nervous. It is because I conceive myself to be all that. A nervous, shy, not good enough woman. It then projects in all I do and more so in my personal life. I see myself as someone not worthy of love! All this then makes sense because I go into a relationship feeling unworthy of love and end up acting that way too. I now know why I destroy every relationship I touch. Yikes!

“Inferiority and superiority are reverse sides of the same coin. The clue lies in realising that the coin itself is spurious.”

Always feeling inferior and dealing with those I feel are acting superior. Looks like we really are all in the same boat. Feelings of inadequacy cause one to look/act superior or inferior. A wake up call for me. Now I know better.

“Continually criticizing yourself for past mistakes and errors does not help matters, but on the other hand tends to perpetuate the very behaviour you would change.”

The area of criticizing me is my speciality. Over and over again I have dwelt on my past mistakes. Using every opportunity to bring them up. It is time to let go.

“Consider the risk before the wheels start turning.”

Usually after I do something or make a decision then I begin to worry. This changes nothing. The action is done. Moving forward I must learn to let go. Once the wheels start to turn I choose not to consider the risk. Let the dice fall where it may.

“The attitude of unhappiness is not only painful, it is mean and ugly.

My attitude has been mean and ugly! I have had an attitude that depicts nothing close to happiness. I have been selfish always enjoying my pity party. I don’t want to be that unhappy person spreading sadness wherever I go with imagined problems! Am done being mean.

“Faith is not believing something in spite of the evidence but the courage to do something regardless of the consequences.”

Even with all the faith that I have, I must work on courage. Consequences force me to do nothing. This is an area that I truly need to face head on; Active faith.

“Emptiness is a symptom that you are not living creatively.”
I feel empty. I now know why. Obviously unless I deal with my lack of creativity this is not about to change yet I truly want to change it.

“A healthy strong ego with plenty of self-esteem does not feel itself threatened by every innocent remark.”

I am upset with the remarks that are sometimes sent my way. I am easily hurt. I often excuse it as being sensitive but now I know I have an unhealthy ego that must be worked on.

“The greatest cause of ulcers is mountain-climbing over mole hills.”

Every issue in my life is a mountain. After reading this book I seem to see all my circumstances and problems as imagined! They really are not that serious and are not a do-or-die affair. My perception has been clouded by my perspective and my mental image of me thus affecting my environment.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them helpful?

I am working on exercises to be completed within 21 days to be truly effective. The book has exercises that cause you to actually think; work on the deep and yet necessary issues. They are very helpful on the journey that is absolutely necessary to truly benefit from this reading.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions? If so, please comment.

None.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

A. How interesting was it to read? 7
B. How helpful were the contents? 10
C. How easy was it to understand? 7
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 9

Success Through a Positive Mental Attitude
Assessment by Ann Perez Omenye (Kenya)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The author is bringing out the idea that our mental attitude determines who we are and what we then become. He brings out the invisible talisman that has two amazing powers- PMA and NMA. It has the power to attract wealth, happiness and success and it also has the power to repel these things- our attitude which in this case is either positive (Positive Mental Attitude) or negative (Negative Mental Attitude) and dictate where we end up. Positive mental attitude allows some men to climb to the top and stay there and negative mental attitude that pulls other men down from the top when they have reached there.

A. Your mind is your invisible talisman

What the mind of man can conceive and believe; the mind can achieve with PMA. I now realise that my mind can work for me or against me. I actually do determine the end result of what I do and I am responsible for where I am today! It is really not a stroke of fate or destiny? The thoughts that I have had over the years which in my case were certainly not very positive, always expecting the worst to happen and indeed when they happen I say, “see I told you so”…all these times I determined the outcome. It was before it actually came into being because of my Negative Mental Attitude (NMA). I have only been using my NMA not my PMA more often than not.

B. Facts should be the stepping stone over the river of doubt- when we have the facts on the ground we should use these to move ahead regardless of how much doubt comes into play. Often I have given up even when the facts clearly show that something can be done because of my “self” doubt.

C. We need to learn how to look at our world with fresh eyes seeing the opportunities that lie about us but simultaneously looking into the future for the chances that are there- More often than not I have only looked at where I am now. Seeing things as they are and wallowing in what I now know as “circumstances” I created not seeing what good can come out of it all and therefore not even seeing beyond them. Opportunities are all around us. We just need to open our eyes and see things differently; with “fresh eyes” that sees possibilities. I am learning to look at the long term result, the future yet living today.

D. M an’s greatest power lies in the power of prayer – This sits very well with me because it reinforces my belief in prayer. With the right attitude and prayer nothing is impossible and all is possible. Our greatest power indeed is prayer as I have seen on a day to day basis in my life. All else without the ability to pray is meaningless.
E. With every adversity there is a seed of an equivalent or greater benefit for those who are motivated with PMA to become achievers- With every problem/struggle that comes our way there is something to be gained. We become achievers when we are able to rise above our adversity, above our struggles. I have been able to learn a whole lot more from my troubles/disappointments then my successes. And now with a positive mental attitude I know that it will even get better. The moment I am able to see beyond my struggles my rewards are even greater. I can become an achiever and not a victim. It really is about me and my mental attitude. Basically I decide.

F. Emotion and reason should be in balance in everyone’s life- Neither should always hold the controlling hand- My emotions have always had the better of me. My emotional state has always affected my reasoning. I have done things, made decisions using my emotions and when looking at them later wonder why I did what I did then. I now know that it is not about having empathy for another too but being reasonable in what I then decide to do. Just because I have the emotion “love” does not mean I should lose reason and forget totally about “me”. I am now working on having my emotions and reason in balance. My emotions no longer control me but are slowly coming into par with my reasoning.

G. If a man is right his world will be right- If I am right from within then everything else around me has to be right. It cannot be otherwise. I cannot expect to have negative energy flowing from within and positive energy coming towards me from without. I have now learnt that it really takes me to have the kind of surrounding (world) that I desire and it all boils down to my attitude. What comes to me is what I attract thus my world.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so, how?

All the lessons/ideas will go a long way in helping me in my daily life. They already are actually. My change of attitude is changing how I see the world, how I think and then eventually those around me will notice the difference too. My way of doing things and people, “circumstances” etc will all be with a better understanding of myself not like before. I now know what it takes to get things different. It begins with myself from within and if I am to create a better world then it will take one person at a time. People getting to the point where they know and understand themselves. Only then can the world really be better. People with positive attitudes working towards creating a world that is “right.” My leading statement then would be “when a man is right, his world will be right.”

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“Everyone has some creative ability but most people haven’t learned to use it.”

I belong to this category that do not believe I have creative ability. The author says everyone some creative ability. I am determined to find out what mine is.

“Time after time the pattern repeats itself; problems and difficulties turn out to be the best things that could have happened to us provided we translate them into advantages.”

A statement that rings absolutely true with me. I have over and over again seen so much come out of my troubles. I have always ended up being at a better place than I was before yet my attitude through it all was negative. How much more would have come out of it had I had a positive attitude!

“You have the tendency to see what you want to see.”

An amazing statement! We see what we want to see. How I see the world is how I want to see it. How I see people, myself is how I want to see them. Once I change how I see then it really means what I see will be different. I set the precedence.

“Hope is the magic ingredient.”

Hope is what has kept me over the years. Even when things were so bad I never lost hope and now I learn it truly is the magic ingredient. I couldn’t agree more.

“Active faith steps out on its belief and risks failure because it assumes it will succeed.”

I knew about faith and now I know about active faith. It goes beyond just believing. It involves doing.

“Anything in life worth working for is worth praying for.”

Prayer has always been a part of my life and this statement affirms this conviction for me.

“The characteristics, abilities and capacities that make you happy and successful in one environment may create an opposite reaction in another square the hole or round the peg.”

I am living this statement at this point in my life. I feel like I am in that place that I do not truly fit. I am in an environment that holds me down and requires a conservative nature yet my spirit feels like flying. Another place another time, I fit but now I need to square the hole or round the peg.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

The dreamers are the saviours of the world. Composer, sculptor, painter ,prophet, sage- these are the makers of the after-world, the architects of heaven- I have read this statement quite a couple of times but still struggle to comprehend it.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them helpful?

Yes the book had quite a number of exercises. I was able to complete them and are working on others as they are continuous.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions? If so, please comment.
None

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

Giant Steps

Assessment by Ann Perez Omenye (Kenya)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The author is trying to inspire and funnel the reader’s energy into measurable results by consistently getting the reader to take simple actions. The author is getting the reader from the simple steps to the giant steps to improve quality of life

A very powerful idea for me today as is clearly reflected in my life. The decisions I have made or rather not made brought me to this point in my life today. Had I made different decisions- more daring ones perhaps- I would be at a totally different place. Yet again I realize that all is not lost. We all have dreams, aspirations- because they are delayed does not mean they will not be. We still get to make the decision.

ii. Beliefs have the power to create and the power to destroy.

All personal breakthroughs begin with a change in beliefs so profound a thought! My belief system over the years has basically controlled how I think and behave. Because of my beliefs I had to do this or the other. Not because I wanted to but because of the power my beliefs had over me. Beliefs most certainly do create or destroy- depending on how we use them.

iii. We must take personal responsibility for our change.

No one can make you change but you. Shake off cultural hypnosis and realize that new actions will produce new results now. No one could make me change. No books, no talk shows, no pep talk or motivation speeches. I needed to do it on my own- myself. Take the ownership and responsibility for my change. When I finally did this, results were evident!

iv. In order to produce the most profound and rapid improvements in the quality of your life, you must shift, change, or expand your identity.

A broader sense of who I am- this has been my biggest challenge at the time I came to IIGL. A lot has changed since then! I have gone through an amazing transformation. I am still answering the question “who am I” but from a totally new standpoint. I am creating my identity and this has changed the quality of my life. I have expanded my identity. I see the bigger picture of me and who I am yet to become.

v. The more decisions you make, the better you’ll become at making them.

The author illustrates this with the use of muscles. They get stronger with use. I could never make decisions. I preferred to let someone else make decisions for me. I have slowly began doing this. One at a time leaving me empowered.

vi. Having a powerful enough why will give you the necessary how.

This basically means that I have to have compelling reasons to get to where I need to be. I was always at cross-roads lacking the how to do something. Believing there are no solutions. My “whys” were just not powerful enough.

vii. Trying to achieve the pleasure of success without risking the pain of rejection would never work.

My fear of rejection has made me sabotage all my possible successes. I avoided taking risks because what if people don’t like me anymore?

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so, how?

I have learned the art of decision making and continue to exercise this every day. I have allowed myself to question beliefs that I have always held true and even the fear of rejection that I previously held is taking a back seat. I have learnt and know that caring about myself and wanting the best for me is not selfishness. I cannot create a better world for others if I am unable to create a better world for me. I must change and own my change. No one is responsible for me but me. I cannot blame the government or society for where I am or who I am. People who changed the world had defining moments in their lives. Heroes contribute to their world even under trying circumstances. I want to contribute to my world. As said our everyday decisions will shape the world we pass on to the future generations.

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“If you trust in the cycle of the season, you know that in the long term you will reap the harvest you have sown.”

Life has its seasons; this is so inspirational and so true for me. I have seen the seasons of life. Spring, summer and winter. Indeed nothing is permanent. No situation is.

“If you ever found yourself taking two steps forward and one step back, invariably it’s because you have mixed associations (associate your goal to both pain and pleasure).”

I am now in a place where I understand what mixed association is and why I seem to stagnate. One day forward and the next back. It just never made sense to me before. Knowing this now makes a whole world of a difference for me

“Rather than feeling trapped, use your pain as your strongest ally (emotional threshold).”

I have been able to use my pain to move me; make me take action. Propel me to the next level. I used to feel like a prisoner. Trapped with no hope of parole. Reaching my emotional threshold I was compelled to take action.

“Some of the simplest things can make the biggest difference.”

Everything counts; there really is no small. And even those we consider small, change everything.

“Knowing what to do is not enough; you must do what you know.”

And for years I knew what to do but did not do it. Procrastinating, waiting does not change the situation. I have to take action. I have to do.

“Live life fully while you’re here. Experience everything. Take care of yourself and your friends. Have fun, be crazy, and be weird. Go out and screw up!”

I laughed when I read this. I have often been so careful! I never knew it was ok to screw up? It really is ok to be crazy. I don’t have to have it together all the time. I should allow myself to explore, learn, and do something different. I have only just began to live.

“When people derive a secondary benefit from the very painful behavior or emotion they’re trying to change, this is called secondary gain. The need to preserve the secondary benefit is often one of the greatest inhibitors of lasting change.”

I am working on the need to preserve the benefits I get from emotional pain. My feelings of inadequacy and pity that I got from the emotional pain from past relationships validated my position of helplessness. I justified my behavior. Secondary gain for me was I had a reason to be where I was. This is work in progress and I am letting it go. I focus on one day at a time.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

No, nothing was unclear to me.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them helpful?

The book had plenty of exercises. The 10 Day- Mental Challenge is worth mentioning. I found it to be quite helpful.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions? If so, please comment.

None, no further comments.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

The New Dynamics of Winning

Ann Perez Omenye (Kenya)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book-

The main idea the author puts forth is that we all have the potential to live our dreams. He seeks to impart practical mental skills to achieve peak performance in any setting. The author inspires and guides the reader to achieve their personal best.

i. If the commitment is there the achievement will follow.

I am one of those people who get fired up to start something, I begin, continue and slowly fizzle out. I have wanted to be a writer since I could read a book! It has still not happened 30 + years later. I have all these big dreams about inspiring people with my writing but I have never been able to. And now this sentence sums it up for me. There has been no commitment from me in getting down to actually writing hence no book- no achievement. I can continue to wish all I want about being an author but it will never happen until am committed to achieving this dream. I look at other areas of my life and I see this trend of lack of commitment being responsible for so many other things I have not been able to achieve. I should have graduated with an MBA by now but yet again I was not committed to actually putting in what is required for me to achieve this.

ii. Most of our hurdles in life are self- imposed limitations that can be overcome.

Looks like Waitley is talking about me here! I saw limitations even where they actually did not exist (or better still I used to see hurdles because since I began this program am seeing things through a different lens altogether) I had never been able to see my strengths as clearly as I saw my limitations. The hurdles I have seen along my way particularly career wise are all self- imposed. “I cannot lead others, I am not educated enough, I don’t have the experience, that is a big corporation.” Now I have overcome these self-imposed limitations. I reigned from my “comfortable” job where the buck did not stop with me and willed myself to a higher position where I have to do what needs to be done. I willed myself to a place where I cannot let these self-imposed limitations thrive. I nipped them in the bud. I brought myself to a place where I have to play on my strengths.

iii. Set your own internal standards for success.

Here is a good one: “All my college mates are now CEOs;” “My siblings own houses;” “My friend has a thriving business” – that was me. I have continued over the years to benchmark my success on other people’s successes. I now realize I need to decide what success looks like for me. What do I consider as success? If I look out for success I now see that I will never truly be enough for me. I will never see my success as enough

iv. We all have a moment of truth that can alter the course of our life forever- only if we catch it and make the most of it.

I have had my moment of truth that is now changing my life a day at a time. My moment of truth came when I got up one morning and realized how empty my life was. I needed a partner, I needed someone to share my life with. I had pretended for so long that things were ok the way they were but deep down I knew they were not. I needed to “shed” off those persons that were making my life “stagnant”. I had to let go of my past and move forward. I made decisions I should have made 15 years ago and begun my journey forward. I know with time I will be able to describe this moment in detail because others need to know about it. A lot of people, women particularly, never truly acknowledge this moment of truth in their life because it has to do with their relationships that they hold so dear that they let the moment go and never catch it.

v. Voices of the past.

This is my undoing every day. The mistakes I made, what I should have done keep going on in my head. Indeed voices of the past! I am learning to quiet them though! It is getting easier with time because I see and feel how much I have changed!

vi. Unholy trinity of denial.

Negating the validity of fine performance! I am never good enough! Have never been good enough! It’s amazing that I never realized how I never ever complimented myself for good performance. I simply brushed it aside. Others could see how good I was but not me.

vii. What you see is what you will be,

Kind of ties to number 6 for me. What I was seeing of myself is what I was turning out to be. IIGL came at the right time for me because I was at the point where if I did not start seeing myself differently I was headed downhill. I was seeing myself as a non-performer, someone with no friends, a doormat and that is what I was turning out to be!

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so, how?

Commitment on my journey towards change for myself is key if I want to truly experience change and grow. I cannot move one step forward and then two steps backward. Consistency for me is of paramount importance at this stage in my journey. My going backwards to the voices in the past will be an impediment to me moving forward but only if I allow it. My past failures and the failures I am yet to experience will no longer be a reference point for me. Because I “messed” up then does not mean I will mess up now. In my effort to create a better world I am now able to see people holistically and not just what I knew about them then. Because they did what they did then does not mean I have to judge them based on that. We have to give benefit of doubt in the now. My perception of success is changed too. Success for me is no longer in material/physical terms alone. Looking at the richest man and the richest woman and looking at where I am in my life at that point and seeing failure! I now learn and know that we set the standards of success as individuals. This then also means that I cannot look at another and see failure if I do not know what their measure of success is.

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“Fixation on that single imperfection can needlessly destroy any sense of personal accomplishment.”

I am the kind of person that continually dwells on that one mistake that I made never praising myself for my successes. Waitley pointing this out makes me see how much damage I do to myself when this happens because I cannot celebrate “me.”

“Find the courage to enter your own arena and embrace the risk that every champion takes. You must accept the rewards and the consequences of your own behavior.”

And that is what I am doing right now. Working on courage every day to enter my own arena. To stand on my own and take responsibility for my actions.This has been most difficult for me because of my inability to make decisions and fear of repercussions. I am learning to own the consequences of my behavior and not pass the buck. It stops with me.

“Losers let it happen, winners make it happen.”

Winners are naturally action oriented- I am quite passive- have been quite passive that is- waiting for things to happen for me. They never do. I have to make them happen. I have to take action and not be a passenger in my own life.

“Life is not a treasure hunt. Life is the treasure.”

And here I was looking for the treasure when I already am in the treasure! Every day I am learning that life is precious, it’s the one that actually matters. All these things we spend our moments chasing do not really matter. If we truly breathe in life and live to the fullest the rest does come to pass too.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

There is a statement, “What you show to the world on the outside is a reflection on how you feel on the inside.” I am not sure I agree with this really. It may be true but perhaps not totally? There could be exceptions. I will look at the example of the late Robin Williams. He, plus many others who have taken their own lives, never let the world see that they were helpless, troubled, feeling lost etc. In fact they look to the rest of us like they have it all together which obviously through their actions we learn that this is not the case at all. What they were showing to the world is not a reflection of how they feel on the inside? Was it? I will come closer to home and talk about me. I have always felt lonely, alone, unwanted etc. yet when people that I interact with see me they don’t see all this stuff. They see confidence, passion, a go-getter etc. but this is because that is what I want them to see. Not because I feel that way on the inside

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them helpful?

The 21 day program which I have started on.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions? If so, please comment.

None

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

Real Magic

Assessment by Ann Perez Omenye

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The author is making an effort to teach the reader how to create a higher level of awareness. It is the writer’s blueprint to assist the reader develop this awareness and apply it in his personal life and his relationships with the larger world. The writer tries to show the reader how to create what he may have previously thought impossible for his life. He is teaching the reader to go beyond believing and goal setting to a new place within himself, the place of knowing. He takes the reader to the realm where miracles are produced.

i. Spiritual beings do not order their lives to be against anything.

This was a real opener for me. If one is against hunger then they should promote abundance not be campaigning against starvation! We promote that which we want not that which we are against. I have always been against one thing or the other e.g. Corruption which is rampant in my country. What I should instead be doing is promoting honesty, transparency and integrity instead of speaking up against corruption. I have often felt the need to speak up against those being unfair to women in my work place yet what I ideally should be doing is promoting an environment that would make them feel oppressed instead of highlighting what they lack I should be able to help them see and appreciate what they do have at the work place. Fighting poverty in Kenya will not cut it- what I now need to promote and work for is how to create abundance and bring enlighten on how to get out of the situations they find themselves in

ii. Life gives exams and unless you learn from your mistakes you are doomed to repeat them again.

So true a statement. I have had the same results over and over particularly in my relationships where I have felt used and taken for granted. I used to follow through the same pattern and indeed expected different results! I had not learnt the lessons I needed to learn from the mistakes I had made and this kept on following me. Joining IIGL and getting my “awakening” brought real change to me that is actually visible. I had to learn from my mistakes. The mistakes in those relationships that I had kept on repeating. Once I was able to acknowledge these mistakes and not repeat them I have been “promoted” to another “class”. I am done with those particular exams in my life because I have learnt what they were meant to teach me. Repeating the mistakes would no longer validate them as mistakes but something I am knowingly doing and knowing what the end result would be.

iii. You overcome weakness by leaving them behind; you cannot outthink your weaknesses and limitations.

And this could not have been put any better. One can only overcome weakness when you actually leave that weakness behind them. The art of letting go. I struggled with this for years too. Never wishing to walk away from things and people that were obviously destroying me thinking I could defeat them with my will to change. It never works. I had to stop certain friendships that promoted my weakness because there was no way I was going to have the will to say no. I had to physically remove myself from them to be able to grow out of my weakness. I was once very gullible, always eager to please and some friends took advantage of this quite a bit. I often resolved that they would not “make” me do this or the other but I was only able to have a mind of my own when I disengaged from them and was able to see things from my own perspective. I now know that it is ok to walk away. I am one of those that basically holds on to people and things even when deep down I know and realize that they are working against me.

iv. Create an openness to the possibility rather than continuing to subscribe to the impossibility.

And that was me a year ago. Always seeing what cannot be! The impossibilities were always so clear to me but the possibilities I could not even begin to imagine. I could go on and on about how I could never be, I have shortcoming, life is unfair, I don’t have the capacity. I worked on all the reasons why it was impossible but never once looked at why or perhaps how it could be. Joining IIGL and reading “As a man Thinketh,” by James Allen brought to my attention something I never even remotely imagined. I could think myself to these “impossibilities”- as a man thinks so he is! Now Dyer in this book brings even more meaning to it with the art of creating miracles. I can actually think my way into my miracle. I am now a year later a notch higher in my career, something I did not even think possible and had a million reasons to support the impossibility too. Now I am open to anything! I see, I breathe and feel my possibilities. I no longer believe it is impossible for me- if others have achieved this thing that I am aspiring to achieve, why not me? I could not stand before a group with ease and deliver a presentation before. I would fret and worry about what they would think about me. I know go with confidence, feel confident and exude confidence and the result is amazing!

v. The idea of developing authentic power for yourself.

And this I am still working on and learning how to do every day. I am no longer victimized emotionally- I do not need any specific external conditions for me to feel loving and purposeful and to enjoy the present moments of my life- not too long ago this would not have been possible. My happiness and how I felt on the inside was determined by external forces. What someone did, what they did not do, what do I lack, what do I need, my fears, my wants. I had no power within me to determine how I feel. Others made me feel. I still do have challenges with this but every day I will myself to develop this authentic power. I know with daily purposeful practice of the same I will get there.

vi. We grow up believing in so many limitations that after a while our lives actuallymanifest these limitations.

This made me laugh! How so true. – My favorite statement for a long time was- I can’t help the way I am. I have always been that way- so not true. This is a limitation I put on my life and reinforced over the years. I behaved exactly as I believed myself to be. Nothing more, nothing less. I actually manifested my belief about myself and carried it with pride- this is who I am! We do this all the time not even realizing what we are doing! A real wake up call for me. Blaming everyone; my family is responsible for my personality? No, I am responsible. The choice is mine and has always been mine. I grew up knowing people in Africa are poor and food donations come from the West because they have everything. Laughable when I think about this now because poverty is a limitation we have continued to put on the continent and go ahead to manifest it. This with organizations like IIGL is bound to change as we churn out people who do not believe in limitations and don’t create them either. We are looking at a generation that sees beyond the present circumstance and are able to call forth the “impossible”.

vii. Ask nothing of anyone and practice unconditional acceptance.

A powerful lesson. Finally realizing that people actually owe me nothing and I should expect nothing from them. Often I have felt pained when someone I expected something from failed me or they did something I did not expect them to do. In reality I was not meant to expect. Asking nothing of anyone actually does give freedom. I am learning to accept people for who they are and not who I expect them to be. I am learning the art of not judging.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so, how?

All powerful ideas that are intertwined with my personal life and helping me create a better world. Once I am able to use these ideas in my personal life they will then roll over. I will create miracles in my life and then manifest these into my world, my society. It begins with me. I can begin to see the impossibilities turning them into possibilities. Instead of fighting for a cause I will work towards and support a cause. I am a miracle and I will create miracles in my world for a better world. My culture, my society, where I come from will no longer be a limitation.

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“The ability to create magical relationships in your life begins and ends with you – you do not define others with your judgment.”

My relationships and how they turn out are determined by myself. It is all about me. What am I bringing on board and not what I expect someone else to bring.

“Being broke is a temporary state of affairs that afflicts almost everyone at one time or another but being poor is an attitude, a set of beliefs that gets reinforced when we shift to blaming life circumstance for the eradication of poverty.”

I always thought I was poor J It was all in my mind. I am rich, I am powerful beyond measure. My brokenness is indeed temporary. I cannot blame life but rather work with life to prosperity. And prosperity is really not just material. It goes way beyond

“When you have mastered the art of giving to others, then practice the equally important art of giving to yourself.”

A reminder to myself to take care of me too. I am always about giving but have notlearnt how to give myself too. I am important too

“You must be willing to give to others even when your coffer is not full for this is your purpose.”

I am to give not because I have. When people give it is not that they have abundance but because it is their purpose. IIGL makes a lot of sense for me with this statement. Particularly the donors. It is not that they have more than we do but they are willing to sacrifice to fulfill a purpose. Our purpose is independent of coffers! A real challenge for me to act on.

“Rejoice in the prosperity of others.”

I have never done this before. I am now looking at others and not wishing what they have but rejoicing with them at their accomplishments.

“The great and glorious masterpiece of man is how to live with purpose.”

I must live with purpose. That is the only way to live. I choose to live that way. Without purpose then we never really cannot live a full life. Until I discovered this I was always feeling lonely and lost.

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them helpful?

Yes it did including meditation which I want to explore further.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions? If so, please comment.-

None.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

A. How interesting was it to read? 9
B. How helpful were the contents? 10
C. How easy was it to understand? 9
D. Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 10

Nonviolent Communication
Assessment by Ann Perez Omenye (Kenya)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

Marshall Rosenberg seeks to share language and communication skills that strengthen our ability to remain human under trying conditions. He brings out the idea of non-violent communication. He reminds us about how we are meant to relate to one another and to assist in living in a way where we can express ourselves with honesty and clarity, while simultaneously paying others respectful and emphatic attention.

i. Life alienating communication traps us in a world of ideas about rightness and wrongness- a world of judgments.

This idea is an area in my life that I can truly connect with and relate to. Growing up I knew that one thing was wrong and the other was right. There never was really anything in between for me. I was conditioned to identify ideas about bad things- sin- and also know what was good. I was taught to judge. The life alienating communication that was pumped into me grew with me. It is only now years later more so after beginning the IIGL program that I have truly began to see things as neither black or white, right or wrong….I am able to see beyond my ideas of right and wrong. I am able to see gray too. I had been trapped in a world where I passed judgment and felt “righteous” about it.

ii. Expressing our vulnerability can help resolve conflicts

This is beyond an idea for me. It actually is my reality. Only that it worked in the opposite direction for me. I did not know any better. Expressing vulnerability was and had never been something I have been able to do. I thought being strong, or rather pretending to be strong would resolve the conflicts I was dealing with. I was conditioned to not show weakness. I only now realize that had I expressed my vulnerability I probably would not have had to even deal with some of the conflicts I have dealt with. Never showing weakness/vulnerability is actually not an indicator of being strong. Rather we are weak. Being vulnerable brings you to that point where you are able to acknowledge that you are capable of pain, that you are a feeling being- only then can one work towards conflict resolution.

iii. When we express our needs we have a better chance of having them met

How profound an idea. Related to 2 above I never expressed my needs until quite recently. It’s like I expected people to deduce what I needed! And of course my needs were never met. Leading to resentment, bitterness and loss of relationships when all along the people I expected to meet my needs never even realized I had the particular need. All I needed to do was open my mouth and talk. I am getting better at expressing my needs but I am not really there yet. I am making progress J

iv. Most of us have never been taught to think in terms of needs. We are accustomed to thinking about what’s wrong with other people when our needs aren’t being fulfilled

Again related to the previous idea put across. When people did not or rather do not meet my need I see them as self- centered. Selfish people who only think about themselves and not about me. I look at them and wonder, “How can they be like that?” Ideally I should probably be thinking “How can they not be like that?” They may have an unmet need that makes them the way they are, a cry for help that I do not even hear because am standing there waiting for them to fulfill a need of mine that they have no idea about and have passed judgment on them already anyway. I am learning to hear more than what is said and to look beyond my physical eyes see. I am learning to think of people beyond their actions towards me. I finally realize that indeed it is not always about me!

v. Compliments are often judgments however positive of others.

I often compliment when I get the opportunity! A totally astounding revelation for me. I never realized that by the time I compliment I have judged. Looking at it from the author’s perspective I realize that judgment is not only in the negative but falls in the positive sphere as well. Giving out compliments should be on the basis of real events/actions not generalized or imagined because of how we judge.

vi. Avoid “shoulding” yourself

I am a culprit. “I should have done this business”, “I should never have gone into this relationship, “I should never have resigned from my government posting” and the list goes on and on. Looking at “should” from where I was standing seemed like all was lost. False. It should have happened, it did not but that does not mean it is over. Am done “shoulding” myself. I was the master of the blame game- only the person I often blamed was me.

vii. The most dangerous of all behaviors may consist of doing things “because we are supposed to.”

And this most dangerous behavior is what I exhibited for years. I did most of the things I did because I was supposed to do them. When I think about it now I cannot even figure out what or whom I was benchmarking my “supposed to” with. Through the years I lost me and the resulting person was one I hardly recognized. It has taken a lot to find me and start being me! I wore my hair in a certain way because that is what pretty girls did. I tried make-up because I was supposed to, I went to certain places and stayed in relationships because I was supposed to. I agree with the author- “because we are supposed to” is the most dangerous of all behavior.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so, how?

As I learn to express myself with honesty and clarity I will be moving from the old pattern of withdrawing and defending in the face of judgment and criticism. This will not only enhance my relationships but will give those that I relate with opportunity to be who they really are and not what they are supposed to be when around me to avoid upsetting me or getting judged. When this kind of relationships grow in the society we live in we will be slowly causing a ripple effect and begin to create a better world. A world where we actually communicate and communicate authentically. A world where we realize that we do not have to be violent communicators. We can truly live in harmony because we have moved from the point of defending ourselves one to another. These ideas incorporated into our lives moves us from the point of looking beyond the obvious whenever we encounter one another.

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“Focus on what we want to do rather than what went wrong.”

What went wrong had been my focus for a long time that I did not even know what I wanted to do now. I spent my time dwelling on the past. Over time I realize that what went wrong went wrong, I cannot undo it but I can use the “wrong things” that happened to help me focus on what I want to do. I now concentrate on what I want and not what I do not want

“Despite our unease in receiving appreciation, most of us yearn to be genuinely recognized and appreciated.”

This statement resonates with me. While I have often felt rather uncomfortable being appreciated I realize that I yearn to receive to be recognized and appreciated. Has been a little difficult for me to understand how this is so and was quite interesting to read it in this book.

“It is impossible for us to give something to another if we don’t have it ourselves.”

Absolutely! We cannot share what we ourselves do not have in us. I have had people expect me (or I imagined that they expected me, now that I know better) to treat them in a certain way, understand them over something and even love them perhaps in a certain way but it has been impossible for me. Maybe because this thing they needed from me needed to first develop in me. Things like, trust, patience are some things I have found truly difficult to give. They have had to grow in me first.

“Self-judgments, like all judgments are tragic expressions of unmet needs.”

I have been the worst judge of myself. I have often judged myself harshly- now that I look back- I had needs, I still do that were obviously unmet hence the harsh criticism about me and the person that I am. I had unmet needs, unfulfilled desires that somehow had no one to meet them.

“The more directly we can connect our feelings to our own needs, the easier it is for others to respond compassionately to our needs.”

And how did I expect anyone else to understand what I needed when even I did not know what I needed, felt or wanted. It has been a long journey to walking the path of self -discovery for me particularly in relation to my needs. I have had a hard time connecting my feelings to what I need and yet expected other people to respond to this need that I myself did not truly understand. I often never even acknowledged what I was feeling so obviously was unable to clearly put forward what my need is- I often ended up feeling alone. Like no one cares.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them helpful?

Yes it did. Was a great learning time for me.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions? If so, please comment.

None

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

The Law of Attraction
Assessment by Ann Perez Omenye (Kenya)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book?

The author is trying to bring a clearer understanding on the law of attraction. He tries to help the reader understand how and why the law of attraction happens. The author writes on why we experience what we do and more importantly helps us discover how to use the law of attraction more deliberately.

i. The Law of Attraction does not care whether you are remembering, pretending, playing, creating, complaining or worrying. It responds to your vibration and sends you more of the same.

This is a very powerful idea. To realize that my now is affected by the vibration I am sending out. I have often been on “a roll” of good things then I begin recalling the past “injustices” and unknowingly send out negative vibes and suddenly everything is going crazy and I have never truly understood why. The Law of Attraction responds to my current vibration! Where I come from people often equate this to witchcraft – when each time something is going ok and then it always begins to fall apart. And this happens all the time. Could be something about the Law of Attraction!

ii. Most affirmations don’t work because the Law of Attraction does not respond to words – it responds to how you feel about the words you use

So so true! I read affirmations, recited them in-front of my mirror each morning (as recommended) but nothing really changed. The Law of Attraction does indeed respond to the feelings and not just hollow words. I could recite affirmations all day long and nothing would ever change unless my feelings were in sync with my words. Yet at different point in my life, after joining IIGL, I affirmed myself about a relationship, totally believed each word I was saying and it came to pass- even better than I thought or even remotely imagined. I continue to attract goodness into that relationship through positive word affirmation and feeling.

iii. The least amount of time you spend putting your attention, energy and focus toward contrast the better.

Absolutely. I spent a lot of time whining about all things wrong and indeed got a triple dose of it. Kept on attracting the wrong friends, wrong jobs. I spent too much time focusing on contrast. While it was important to identify what I did not want it was not necessary to swim in it. Observing contrast however helped me clearly identify what I did not want.

iv. The most common source of doubt (negative vibration) is from your own limiting beliefs

I used to be a “doubter”- not anymore though. I am a believer in “all things possible”- This sentence rings true for me because I used to have limiting beliefs. I never believed certain things would ever be so of course I doubted. My limiting beliefs made my doubt so huge that my life was stagnant. Once we are able to conquer these limiting beliefs doubt fades away. I am a living example of that. I have been able to go past my limiting beliefs and doubt for me is never “in my face” as it used to be before. Limiting beliefs fuel doubt in a really big way going ahead to affect every area of an individual’s life.

v. Decide more often. You will feel instant relief from the positive emotions that come with each act of deciding

And this was me- always undecided. I could never ever make a decision. Always on the fence which has caused me loads of negative emotions, I was always on the edge. I never truly knew what next. The power to decide or rather the ability to decide is able to give relief, no matter what the decision is – as long as you make it. Deciding and continuing to decide more often than I used to has allowed me positive emotions that have propelled me forward in every area of my life particularly my relationships.

vi. Your job is not to try to figure things intellectually, but to let the Law of Attraction figure it out.

Yes, sometimes, if not all times we just need to let things be. We don’t always have to have a plan. We know what we want, we don’t know how yet so let the Law of Attraction figure it out. It’s not our job to do the math but to set the stage for the math to be done. I have learnt to let things be- I don’t fret too much. I breathe easy. So different from me almost suffering anxiety attacks in the past as I tried to intellectually figure out things.

vii. The Law of Attraction responds the same way your mind does; it hears what you don’t want.

A friend used to tell me to think about what I don’t want –I really should have been thinking about what I want because that is what would come to me. We thought that by thinking about what we did not want we would not get it. I often think about all the things that I don’t want to happen. I now know better. I attract what I think about. Positive or negative.

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so, how?

An understanding about the The Law of Attraction is what my “world” needs. We attract what we think- what we don’t want and what we do want- The world will be a better place when we are able to share and teach these principles. Poverty, wars etc. would all be dealt with- each one attracting positive vibes allowing problems (or perceived problems for that matter to be dealt with) it begins with me. I create a positive environment using the Law of Attraction and this in turn rubs off on the Negative Nelly in my life who then also rubs off on another Negative Nelly and the ripple effect takes over. Creating a better world starts with me- at home, in the office, in social settings. I choose to attract a better world.

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

“Never expect a thing you do not want, and never desire a thing you do not expect.”

I have been very good at expecting what I do not want. I actually wait for it to happen. It often does J Additionally, I have in the past desired things that I did not expect and naturally I remained with unfulfilled desires. Now I expect what I want. I desire and expect. I have the evidence of this working perfectly!

“Giving anything attention of any kind enhances it in your current vibration.”

A statement that propels me to give little or no attention to certain things that “irritate” me and think more about the happy things that are going on for me. I am working on a positive vibe 24/7.

“Take the time to appreciate anything. It’s the feeling that is attached to your appreciation that is important.”

Something I have always been great at. It is an amazing feeling.

“Always say yes to money.’

I have in the past avoided saying yes to money. I did not want to look greedy! I know better now. An offer for lunch will no longer be turned down. I am currently using the Law of Attraction for my finances and am confident that things are about to shift for the better. In a big way.

5. Is there anything in the book that you do not understand or are unclear about, or are there ideas which you disagree with and, if so, why?

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them helpful?

Yes it did. Quite exciting worksheets to work with long term.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions? If so, please comment.

None.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

Seven Habits of Highly Effective People

Assessment by Ann Perez Omenye (Kenya)

1. What is the main idea that the author is trying to convey in the book-

In The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, the writer gives insights/teachings into habits for personal dealings. The author is giving practical solutions to people who want to take control of not only their lives but businesses and careers as well.

i. If we wanted to change the situation, we first had to change ourselves. And to change ourselves effectively, we first had to change our perceptions.

An idea that I have personally experienced in my life over the past year or better put since starting my studies at IIGL. My situations have changed but I had to change first. My perceptions took a radical shift and indeed so did my situation. I have since moved from a position of “helplessness” to one of “empowerment”

ii. If you want to have a happy marriage be the kind of person who generates positive energy and sidesteps negative energy rather than empowering it.

And this is an idea I believe applies to all relationships but indeed more so to marriage. It is an idea I want to carry along with me into marriage- a lasting marriage where I can add value and not empower it as I have often done in other relationships. Generating negative energy and sidestepping positive energy by whining!

iii. We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is not an act, but a habit.

I am soldiering on, keeping at it! So indeed excellence for me is not a one off but something I am growing into every day. It then is bound to become a way of life for me, a habit. Nothing happens without persistence-an important lesson I have had to learn.

iv. “Lift off” takes a tremendous effort, but once we break out of the gravity pull, our freedom takes on a whole new dimension.

I recall almost two years ago when I started studies at IIGL. I am so different now. It has taken tremendous effort to get me here and am still getting better! The freedom of both heart and mind for me is overwhelming. Starting off was really hard. I had to change, “lift off” from where I was to get to where I needed to be. Once you are able to actually begin the journey is so much easier.

v. The independence of character empowers us to act rather than be acted upon.

Often the way others have acted toward me has led me to be indifferent or perhaps act like they do. I have often done this without realizing it though. I have not empowered myself to be independent of character until now. My character at any one point is ideally not supposed to be determined by others. I choose what character to have and this character does not have to change with how people are acting or not acting around me.

vi. Reactive people build their emotional lives around the behavior of others empowering the weakness of other people to control them

And this statement hits right home. My emotional life or world was and has for a long time been built around others. This relates strongly to number 5 above. Because I was not independent of character I was then reactive letting my emotions go up and down on a rollercoaster of sorts because other people’s behavior affected me. My happiness or lack of it was not mine to choose. I empowered those I considered my “persecutors”- sulking and believing life was an unfair was the order of the day for me.

vii. Until a person can say deeply and honestly, “I am what I am today because of the choices I made yesterday, that person cannot say, “I choose otherwise.”

And I joyfully relate to this; I can now say “I choose otherwise.” I am empowered. From the time I was able to honestly admit that I am what I am today through my own making I have had the power to work on changing that. I live by, “A day at a time.”

3. How will these ideas or lessons help you in a practical way, both in your daily personal life and in helping you to create a better world? If so, how?

We are responsible for ourselves and we determine how the world becomes. We are individuals who should be proactive rather than reactive improving our world. We are repeatedly what we do and if each one of us can understand this causing a ripple effect (as I have seen to be the best way to create a better world) one person at a time. I believe this is what IIGL is doing too- ripple effecting- changing individual lives one at a time through enlightenment- which is then shared with those that they interact with and creating a better world.

4. Quotes: Are there any statements which the author made that particularly got your attention? If so, please quote them and comment as to why they were important to you.

Here are the quotes I found to be the most important:

“Love is a verb. Reactive people make it a feeling. They’re driven by feelings.”

When I first started my primary school education I was taught that a verb is “a doing word” I now meet love as a verb- something I do and not just feel. My feelings have often got in the way of my expressing love. I have been reactive giving and withholding love based on my feelings. It is a wonderful feeling to realize and know that I have moved beyond being reactive in love and are in control of how I behave. My feelings do not determine my expression of love.

“Happiness like unhappiness is a proactive choice.”

Yet another nail on the head. My happiness is my choice to make. My victim mentality that my happiness was determined by others no longer stands.

“Wisdom is your perspective on life, your sense of balance, your understanding of how the various parts and principles apply and relate to each other.”

A statement that speaks for itself. Profound words about wisdom that I am now embracing.

“Effective people are not problem minded- they are opportunity minded. They feed opportunities and starve problems.”

I smile at this sentence. Somehow I no longer see problems! I used to see them everywhere. Clearly shows me that I am moving closer to being effective J I dare to do more. I take risks and see opportunities in them

“Anytime we think the problem is “out there,” that thought is the problem. We empower what’s out there to control us.”

And this sums up what we are learning in all the books and possibly what IIGL is about. It is never about others but about us. The problem is not out there. We determine our world.

None.

6. Did the book contain exercises for the reader to complete? If so, did you complete all of the exercises and did you find them helpful?

The book had several exercises. Some that can be worked on immediately and others that will require more time. I found them to be very helpful when done and they go a long way to helping the reader (myself) to understand the rest of the book.

7. Was there anything you read in the book that you would like to comment on that was not covered in the previous questions? If so, please comment.

Nothing I can think of.

Please rate the following questions on a scale from 1 to 10. Ten is good and one is poor.

A. How interesting was it to read? 9
B. How helpful were the contents? 9
C. How easy was it to understand? 9
D.Would you recommend it to others? 10
E. What is the overall rating you would give it? 9